Set up automatic payments so they are initiated on your end, so that you send out money to the bill/ company you’re paying instead of giving them access to take money out of your account.
Have a yearly “review” right before school year. Raise allowance as appropriate. If they want more money, they’ll have to take on more responsibilities.
Failed?
Lift yourself up, or live there.
You know the work you need to do, be it physical, mental, emotional or spiritual, etc. So do it. Do the work.
The only bitterness in failure comes from not having the guts to get back up again.