Talk to people like they belong and are valued exactly as they are in that moment.


12-14, 21



Don’t offer them advice until you ask questions: What does a good outcome here look like for you? How much energy are you willing to put into this? Do you feel like you’re being asked to sacrifice a part of who you are if you do this? Is the fear you’re feeling maybe just that initial reaction we all get when something is new and unfamiliar? Stuff like that. Mostly they just need help understanding themselves and encouragement to stay true to themselves.


4, 7, 12, 15, 18, 21



Put down your phone and be in the moment. Teach this. Model this.


7



Talk about what’s normal and what’s abnormal reactions to alcohol and drugs. Basically all kinds of feels from euphoria to paranoia to jealousy or infatuation, etc. Getting sick is normal but blacking out is not. *Anything that could interfere with breath or circulation is dangerous.


13, 15, 17



Read Harry Potter series to him / with him.


9-10



“Where you stand depends on where you sit.” It means your personal situation informs your stance on issues. Try to imagine how you’d vote if you were sitting at a less privileged place.


15, 21



You are never too old to play in the snow.


16



Try not to say insulting or hurtful things, but NEVER write them. (Texts, notes, emails, etc.)


11



Golf lessons. Grampa loved golf, if he were here he would have taught you himself.


9



Addiction is when you can’t get through the day without something. It’s not that you need to feel high, it’s that you can’t live without what gets you high. Humans are all wired to be at risk for addiction


13, 15, 18, 20



Jazz in the Garden free outdoor concerts at National Gallery of Art. Fridays during summer months.


7



“Pain that is not transformed is transmitted.” Fr. Richard Rohr


14



An album is like a book, meant to be taken as a whole. It tells a story, has its own vibe. Let’s listen to an album together every week.


12



Let's find little ways to practice self-control and build that muscle.


11



Say it early and repeat it often, so that it sinks way down deep: There is nothing you could do to make me stop loving you. No mistake, no failure, no decision, nothing. There is no hole so deep that if you fell into it I wouldn’t climb down to help you out of. I love you no matter what.


7



Sometimes when you win, you lose. And when you lose, you win. Meaning that sometimes when you get what you want it doesn’t work out well. And sometimes wonderful things happen as a result of a failure or disappointment. Chin up. There’s a million paths to happiness and fulfillment. If one doesn’t work out your will find another.


12, 21



No one knows what they’re doing. Just be kind and brave and curious. You don’t have to have it figured out.


17



Relationships can end beautifully and bravely. They’re not all going to be forever. It’s much better to grieve the end of a relationship than to endure an unhealthy one.


15, 19, 21



In the wise words of Taylor Swift, you don’t have to forgive or forget in order to move on. You can just…move on.


15, 21



Start explaining wants vs. needs. Continue explaining for the next 30 years. We don’t always get what we want. That’s okay. 4 year olds can begin to understand this.


4



When they confide in you or tell you something that makes them so vulnerable u don’t know what to tell them, just sat “I’m so glad you told me.” (You’re not alone, I heard you, I’m here and will stay with you until it’s resolved.) re-ticket yearly.


9



When u drop someone off make sure they’re safely inside before you drive away.


15



Career is so important to your life satisfaction. Do what makes you happy. If you’re really at a loss for what you want to do for work, then go where you’re needed.


18, 21



Worry less about molding them and focus on loving them.


2, 4, 6, 8, 10, 12, 14, 16, 17, 18, 19, 21



Resource: the website Ask, Listen and Learn has great material about how to start a conversation about the dangers of under-age drinking. asklistenlearn.org


9



Theme this year: Self Control (Repeat every year until age 99)


6



Healing takes time. You can't rush it. Whether it's your body, your mind or your heart that's hurting... you just have to let it heal in its own time. What you CAN do is to take good care of yourself: eat, rest, stay close to loved ones. Do things that bring you joy. Revel in the smallest steps forward. You'll heal, things will get better. Trust. Love. Serve. Live.


20



Date all kinds but marry someone who loves you for who you are, with whom you feel most yourself. Someone who will encourage you to grow more into the person you want to be. (And be good at encouraging them to do same.) Never fear or stifle each other’s growth. Celebrate it. Support it. Encourage it.


21



No matter how successful you become you’re still expected to act with integrity and respect.


14, 18, 21



Read biographies. So much to learn and discover by reading about the lives of great men and women. Ducksters.com is a great resource. Amazon and The Learning Well also have great lists. Just Google "biographies for kids."


5-15