When you feel sad, mad, confused or in any way upset, go to a quiet place to catch your breath. If you can sit with it and let it tell you what it wants to tell you, then you become its friend. But if you try to deny the feeling, or numb it, it grows much stronger and it fights you.
9, 13, 19
Start saving money early. Save as much as you can. There are plenty of things worth spending your money on, but be mindful about your money - Don’t p*ss it away.
15, 20
Start explaining wants vs. needs. Continue explaining for the next 30 years. We don’t always get what we want. That’s okay. 4 year olds can begin to understand this.
4
You don’t have to be friends with people you don’t like. But you can’t decide you don’t like someone unless you get to know them. (Rather than a look or a reputation or a difference, etc.)
10
Grandpa never wore a watch. (This was way before cell phones existed.) Still, he always knew what time it was, and he was never, ever late.
14
Institute a “Wall of Fame” for accomplishments and victories, big and small. AND a “Wall of Shame” for minor infractions such as not changing the toilet paper roll, etc. We have to be willing to put ourselves on the wall of shame too - and that’s the lesson: We all make mistakes but we own up to them, fix them if possible and learn from them always. Also good fun. Start our with actual paper version but transition to a shared iCloud album to post wall of shame pics once they are old enough for phones. Maybe even continue through adulthood if they “shame” themselves!
5-15, 18, 21
Toddler not interested in food? Hand them a random kitchen gadget to play with while you’re feeding them dinner, they’ll eat more if distracted.
1,2
Make yourself a good hand. Don't wait to be asked, just jump in when you see a need. Wash a dish, make a bed, change a tire, help out a friend or a stranger whenever you can.
14-20
Keep a pair of nail clippers in the car - much better lighting outside. Clipping tiny fingernails is terrifying!
Infant-1
Your spouse will be absolutely unbearable roughly 10% of the time. So will you be, by the way. Give grace. Receive it too. Also, physical distance helps, even for a few hours.
21
Be a good guest. Never arrive to a dinner or a party empty handed. Bring a gift: flowers, food, drink, etc.
18
If you’re having trouble finding your passion, read biographies and memoirs of people from all walks of life. There are so many worlds out there! You’ll find one that excites you, where your unique talents and skill set can shine.
19
When the child is feeling upset or out of control, that is not the time to teach a lesson. Share your calm, be a safe place for them. When they’re feeling better, THEN teach the lesson.
1, 2, 3, 4
Sometimes when you win, you lose. And when you lose, you win. Meaning that sometimes when you get what you want it doesn’t work out well. And sometimes wonderful things happen as a result of a failure or disappointment. Chin up. There’s a million paths to happiness and fulfillment. If one doesn’t work out your will find another.
12, 21
IMPORTANT: If you borrow money from someone pay it back as soon as possible. In full. If you borrow an item, return it in excellent condition. I’d say if you borrow a car, return it with a full tank of gas but hopefully by the time you’re driving there won’t be any combustible engines. So return it fully charged!
12, 14, 16, 21
“For better or worse means no matter what life throws at us, not no matter what you do to me.” - Brenda Linn
19, 21
You can be angry. But you can’t drive while angry or talk to a child or work, or do anything dangerous when you’re angry.
15, 20
When making decisions or setting goals etc, approach from the perspective of your truest self. That’s integrity.
14, 18, 21
My favorite Chinese food order is chicken Kung Pao, shrimp fried rice and beef lo mein. That way we all get a little of each meat.
16
When it comes to clothes and makeup, women have one dress code: whatever the f*ck they want. Hijab or bikini, it’s not women’s job to appeal to men. It’s not women’s job to keep men’s appetites subdued.
14, 17, 21