Never follow an “I love you” with a “but...” Instead, follow it with “and...” or “that’s why...” Remember this when they’re young, teach it to them when they’re older.


10, 20



“Abhor what is evil. Hold fast to what is good.”


10, 12, 14, 16, 18, 21



Discuss difference between foods that taste good vs. foods that make you FEEL good.


12-14



Girls forget a good bit of compliments they receive but they remember every single insult. Speak gently, remind them they’re beautiful. Never qualify it.


12, 14, 17



Don’t give up on your dreams, but remember there will be plenty of times when you have to tweak them a bit…or a lot. I think of all the couples who were slated to get married in 2020. They either postponed or scrapped the big wedding for a backyard ceremony and bbq. How many brides had to *massively* shift heir vision and let go of what they assumed their wedding would look like. This happened to my friend and she cried and cried, of course. It was a big disappointment. But then she and her fiancé had the most charming backyard ceremony. It was small but so romantic.Now she says she wouldn’t change a thing about her wedding. I’ve got a silly example from my own dreams. I had long hoped to spend my 50th birthday on Maui with friends and family all staying at the Four Seasons. Fifty happened during Covid so I moved my dream celebration to sixty. And then come to find out tourism isn’t considered a good thing by locals in Hawaii, so will choose a different destination where tourism is encouraged and sustainable. I’m still dreaming my dream, even it looks different than I thought it would. All this to say, don’t lose heart when stuff happens and your plans are upended. Be honest about your disappointment about what’s been lost, but then be open to opportunities this new turn of events brings with it. There are always blessings hidden among heartbreak.


13, 17, 21



Healing doesn’t mean becoming the best version of yourself. It’s learning to love even the worst parts about yourself.


17, 21



Mackinac Island trip


10



“When happy, be kind. When sad, be kind. When ever…be kind.” - Cory Booker


9, 12, 15, 19, 21



Sometimes I think the best way to take care of them is to teach them to take care of others: Littler kids, sick or disabled, those who’ve been left out.


5-7, 1Infant-12



I like to say a Hail Mary just to join the chorus, to add my voice to the millions who are praying in that moment. The world has plenty of people thinking or doing horrible things, we need to add to the good, add to the beauty as much as possible at every turn. Saying a quick prayer is sometimes all I can muster.


9-19



Rain, snow or sleet...Always return the shopping cart to the proper spot in the parking lot.


17



To calculate military time starting at 1300, subtract 12.


15



Test


1-2



When driving in the car with your kids, ask them to count motorcycles, cyclists, pedestrians. Prize to the highest count! This will train them to be on the lookout for them.


10



Fall in love with a person, not a feeling.


19



Write your own job description. When you've been around long enough to know what you're good at and can identify what needs in the company you can help with.


21



It’s hard to want something and not have it. Kids have to learn how to sit with that.


3-17



I’d rather you be brave than perfect. Take chances. Fail, then pick yourself up and keep going.


18



When you begin dating it’s all butterflies and moonbeams. Eventually you’re going to do or say something that hurts the other person and vice versa. For that matter, eventually you’ll disagree about something. It’s VERY important to consider how they handle it. Nobody is perfect, it may not be pretty but it had better be civil. If not, don’t think for a second that they will change. Get outta there.


15, 21



Read Just Mercy by Bryan Stevenson together.


17



The most important things I can teach you is how to love and be loved


14, 19, 21



You’re not obsessed with that person you’re just hyper fixating. It’s ADHD.


12, 16, 19, 21



Ability is distributed equally across all demographics, geniuses, artists, musicians etc. are not more likely to be born in a rich community-but they are far more likely to emerge from one with their gift’s having been nurtured. Ability is evenly distributed but accessibility is not. How many lives could be saved if the brilliant surgeon never gets to college? It’s a core mission of mine to do my part to help change that so that all children can realize their dreams if they work for it. No locked gates!


12, 18, 21



Your good name is the most important credential you’ll ever have. Act with integrity in all things, that ben if it means short-term pain. Build a reputation for honesty, dependability and trustworthiness.


14, 17, 20



Never enter into (or stay in) a relationship with someone based on their “potential.” It’s a recipe for misery, resentment and frustration.


19



Keep in mind the human tendency (rightly or wrongly) to think “how it ends is how it was”. Could be a work shift, a class, a relationship, etc. try to end on a good note.


16, 21



Be supportive of someone who is trying to better themselves.


16



When you’re tired, the next best thing to sleep is a shower.


16



Healing happens when you give up the hope that the past could have been any different. xoxo


20