Have the first of many talks about what consent means. Tell them (boys AND girls) that consent needs to be informed, enthusiastic, sober, ongoing and freely given. Stress that, in no uncertain terms, the absence of consent is rape. Discuss the legal, moral and emotional consequences.


12



Read “Raising a Screen Smart Kid” by Julianna Miner before you consider giving him a phone.


10



Read Big Magic by Liz Gilbert. Re-read every 5-10 years.


19, 21



One of my favorite things is the smell of celery and onion being sautéed in butter. It’s the smell I woke up to on so many Thanksgiving mornings as my mom was making the stuffing.


21



Watch movie Sky Walk (2019) it’s about a school paper.


14, 18



Failures are part of life. Feel free to fail. But behave with honor. Never do anything to tarnish your good name.


14, 18



Listen to Celebrate Calm podcasts for help dealing with defiance.


4, 9, 15



In 2024 there’s a medical test to screen for cancer that involves collecting one’s poo and sending it off to the lab. They just called me to tell me they canceled my test due to a clerical error on the order. I was so mad. The thought of doing that poo test again was freaking me out. Why didn’t the flunky who handles the specimens call before they pitched it? Then it dawned on me: it’s someone’s *job* to process poo specimens. Probably hundreds a day. It’s okay they didn’t stop to call and straighten out my test.perspective!!


17, 21



Every “yes” to something is a “no” to something else. Take your time processing the choices - write in your journal, sweat it out, listen to music, talk to someone you trust, read books from experts. Once you’re clear about what you’re giving up, let it go and don’t look back. (Remember there’s no advice that’s right more than 99% of the time. Always trust your gut. Just remember an impulse isn’t the same thing as a gut check.)


15, 16, 19, 21



The opposite of addiction is connection. Genuine connection can take lots of forms.


14, 17, 19, 21



“Never be sorry for not knowing


17, 21



You’ll miss me when I’m gone, but if I did my job right you won’t need me.


21



Ask: What are you responsible for?


15-18



“First things first!” It’s a constant struggle to get out of the house or complete a task. Hammer home “first things first!” After they’re dressed (or whatever task) THEN they can have screen time or playtime free-time, etc.


4



Worst thing in the world is spending your life with the wrong person.


21



Today is not the day to lose your sh*t. Deep breaths, cold water, do your hair. You’re gonna be just fine.


1-21



Do feel like you’re where you’re supposed to be?


19, 21



Let's find little ways to practice self-control and build that muscle.


11



Teach them about shaken baby syndrome.


13



Be generous in all things. That is my hope for you.


14, 18, 21



Check out the Wolf Trap Children's summer theater.


4-11



Always wear an undershirt underneath a dress shirt.


13



Toddler not interested in food? Hand them a random kitchen gadget to play with while you’re feeding them dinner, they’ll eat more if distracted.


1,2



Go easy on the cologne, perfume, scented lotions, etc. People shouldn't be able to smell your perfume a mile away, only up close. Also, it's generally not appropriate for work.


17



“Natural” deodorant doesn’t work. Go with trusted brands here. There are times when it’s fine not to look your best, but stinky is never okay.


13, 18



Begin planning trip for 10th bday. Maybe to Atlantis in Bahamas or someplace he’d be excited about._____Get him involved in planning and saving.


8



If someone doesn’t want your attention or warrant your attention, don’t give it.


15



I love the quote “The call towards authenticity is sacred” by Paula S. Williams I think it means that a few things: Being called. We are called by something higher to grow and stretch, to evolve. That evolution is a journey that should be undertaken with humility, compassion and love. To impede one’s quest to be authentic, be it our own or another’s, is a grave injustice and should be avoided at all cost.


13, 15, 21



Put together a PowerPoint project outlining addiction: substance, gambling, shopping, hoarding, eating, etc. Have them so the research and put it together. Discuss. Reward its completion with a fun activity or trip.


15



Your sex life should be safe, happy, healthy and consensual. It may or may include going all the way. There’s no rush, every relationship is different. You should feel safe and so should your partner. A lot will be a mystery but you should feel safe. You should be able to trust that your partner won’t intentionally hurt you, emotionally or physically. If you don’t trust your partner to keep you safe, get out.


17