Every “yes” to something is a “no” to something else. Take your time processing the choices - write in your journal, sweat it out, listen to music, talk to someone you trust, read books from experts. Once you’re clear about what you’re giving up, let it go and don’t look back. (Remember there’s no advice that’s right more than 99% of the time. Always trust your gut. Just remember an impulse isn’t the same thing as a gut check.)


15, 16, 19, 21



Purpose is more important than happiness. Having a purpose (or looking for it) will save you. (And sometimes finding a *new* purpose is what you need.)


16, 21



Your mother and I would never want you to sacrifice the wellbeing of your own family for us. They should always be your priority. In the years ahead, make the choices that affirm that.


21



You an learn just about anything on Google or YouTube! Spend some time exploring together and caution about how to search safely.


9



Read maps.


9-14



“Love is giving your heart without expectation.” - Dan Fogelman


16, 21



Buy life insurance when you're young.


21



“A recipe for being mistaken: 1. Dislike someone who's often right. 2. Never agree with someone you dislike.” ——- Paul Graham


16



Quoting Glennon Doyle: “Things can feel hard and sad and still be exactly right, all at the same time.” She’s referring to her divorce but the sentiment applies to all kinds of tough choices that we all make. Very few choices feel 100% right.


17



“Pain that is not transformed is transmitted.” Fr. Richard Rohr


14



That trope “everything happens for a reason” is, I think, b.s. But I absolutely agree that you can find meaning in anything good or bad.


17



Eat with purpose, not for it. Sometimes the purpose is fuel, sometimes celebration. Eat accordingly!


19, 21



Geocaching


5-11



Resist the urge to blurt out and over share when you’re feeling pressured to say something. Have a few “go to” phrases in your back pocket. “I’m at a lack of words” or “vibe check” or “let’s take a beat.” Come up with your own. Calm, kind, respectful. xoxo


11, 12, 14, 17, 21



Reinforce this at every opportunity: “You matter.” Kids respond to this message deeply, whether it comes from a positive source (parents/teacher/coach) or people who are only trying to exploit them.


2-18



Explain the concept: "You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar."


6



Be respectful with regard to how you treat girls:. How you talk to them, how you talk about them, and even how you think about them.


11-14



Replace “but” with “and.” “I love you but...” Becomes “I love you and that’s why...” etc.


9



Learning to keep your composure and maintain a respectful tone when you’re frustrated/angry/afraid/upset, etc. is a skill. PRACTICE it.


4, 5, 6, 7, 10, 12, 14, 16, 19, 21



Dream big. Work hard.


18



Men worry about getting laughed at or rejected by a woman. Women worry about getting killed when they reject a man. Let that sink in.


15, 21



Explain what “On my honor” means.


8



Throw leftovers and some cut up veggies in an omelette/ frittata. Cuts down on food waste and saves money.


17



Have a yearly “review” right before school year. Raise allowance as appropriate. If they want more money, they’ll have to take on more responsibilities.


7-17



1

Model being a considerate person.


2-18



Sailing lessons.


14



I’m going to start you in Mathnasium or some other STEM (math) activity. Not because I want u to score high on your SAT but because I want You to be confident in your math skills you will use it every day and it will come in handy no matter what you choose to do for a living


7



Don’t ask for anything until you’ve done what has been asked of you.


5



A simple trick to calm your nerves: Name 5 things you can hear right now.


5-15



1