Bedtime often goes to sh*t in a hurry because kids are tired and parents are out of patience. Be kind. If your kids are anything like you, they’ll need extra tenderness at bedtime: cuddles, soft words, prayers. Forgiveness for the ridiculous tantrums over silly stuff. Take pity on them, their little bodies are tired and they haven’t learned how to function on empty.
1-4
Name a few male celebrities you would feel safe with alone in a room. Keanu Reeves, Jack Black, Barack Obama, to start us off.
11, 13, 15
Screw “achievement.” Do things you enjoy, share experiences that expand your capacity for joy and compassion. It doesn’t matter if you’re any good, it just matters that you’re in your groove.
16, 21
The Buddhists say “life is suffering.” I think struggle might be a better word. Struggle is unavoidable, and it would do us good to stop expecting otherwise. And yes, everybody experiences pain and loss, etc. but I don’t believe we should expect our lives to be full of suffering.
17, 21
You never know what people are going through. Depression, PTSD, anxiety could look like avoidance, anger, risk-taking, promiscuity, etc. Look out for friends, coworkers and loved ones who may be in pain. You don’t need to solve their problem, just allow for the possibility that they’re going through something. Try to give them the benefit of the doubt and not write off “bad” behavior as a character flaw. Offer a non-judgmental ear.
15, 20
Recipe for happiness that stands the test of time: Be who you are, and figure out how you are uniquely equipped to serve.
15, 21
“Things are not perfect, because life is not TV and we are real people with scarred, worried hearts. But it’s amazing a lot of the time.” - Anne Lamott
14
“People are in your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. Pain comes when we try to put them in the wrong category.” - random therapist I never met.
16
People are insecure. Be mindful of fragile egos (we all have them to a degree.) Avoid implying that people aren't doing a good job.
20
Keep porn to a minimum. Never at school or work. It's normal to be curious but it's really not a healthy representation of sex. Porn is a business. It's designed to get you off, not to be realistic or educational. That's not the way sex looks or how you're expected to behave. Try O.school instead.
15
Drinking doesn’t work like climbing a hill, it works like surfing waves. “More” is not always better. Once you feel tipsy, drinking more will make you feel *worse*. Remember “more alcohol will ruin my buzz.” Coast, recover, then okay to start again.
14. 15. 17. 18. 21
Write “thank you” notes, send pics of them wearing the outfit Grandma gave, etc. You get so many gifts...Be a grateful recipient.
7
We can learn, we can evolve. Let yourself be moved by the spirit. More beauty, more service, more humanity, deeper (or questioned) faith, more love. Always more love. That’s the best I can hope for: that you live a life full of love.
21
The $@!#% never ends. Dealing with the $@!#% IS your job. If you think you’ll ever reach a “post-$@!#%” stage in your life, you’re wrong.
14, 19
Have them sort change, and eventually to count it. It teaches them to gather things that are alike, it's an introduction to money and it occupies them for 15 minutes! Just make sure they're old enough to be past the point of putting coins in their mouth.
3-5
No one knows what they’re doing. Just be kind and brave and curious. You don’t have to have it figured out.
17
Spend time with people you admire, in person and biographies, documentaries, novels and movies.
14-17, 21
Having an opinion is not the same thing as having an informed opinion. If you don't know enough about a subject to speak intelligently about it, keep quiet and educate yourself.
12, 18
Practice making yourself do something you don’t feel like doing. Practice and it gets easier
10, 12, 15, 18, 21