Listen to books of love letters. I forget the title but one of the Bush twins wrote a book about her grandparents (George and Barbara). Stories about real love, real life. Fiction is great too but having a real world examples of happy partnerships is gold.
18
Your mother and I would never want you to sacrifice the wellbeing of your own family for us. They should always be your priority. In the years ahead, make the choices that affirm that.
21
When you have no idea what you’re doing, just be kind. Be brave. Think critically and make the best decisions you can in the moment. If possible, find resources to learn what you need to know. Ask for help if help is available. Do your best and don’t sweat it.
18
Change always brings feelings of unease. It’s easy to confuse that feeling of unease with the feeling that something must be wrong. Give yourself time to adjust before deciding if a new thing is bad..
14, 18, 21
Take heart. There are lots of terrible things in the world - Poverty, disease, injustice, natural disasters...Thankfully, good FAR outweighs the bad: Love, Faith, Art, friendship, healing, creativity, community, innovation, beauty and renewal to name just a few. Focus on the good. Relish in the countless expressions of goodness. Work hard to preserve, protect, and advance them.
18
Toddlers fall... a lot. Most falls are harmless but sometimes bad accidents happen. Head injuries are scary because they bleed and swell. If bleeding doesn't stop within a few minutes or you can see it's a big gash, head to the urgent care. And remember if the swelling goes out (“goose egg”) that’s a good thing: Better out than in.
2
An album is like a book, meant to be taken as a whole. It tells a story, has its own vibe. Let’s listen to an album together every week.
12
When someone introduces themselves as transgender, it’s no big deal. Simply say “nice to meet you” or “cool.” Then politely ask “What are your pronouns?” And then you know how they prefer to be addressed.
13
Songs hit so much different (better) when you read the lyrics while listening. Headphones help heighten the experience too.
12, 14, 19, 21
Just let a sweet moment be. There’s a time for jokes or small talk, but sometimes silence is best.
15,21
Failures are part of life. Feel free to fail. But behave with honor. Never do anything to tarnish your good name.
14, 18
Putting up the Christmas tree the weekend or next after Thanksgiving, then watching Polar Express in the glow of the lights. Maybe the smell of gingerbread cookies baking too.
5-9
Watch film “Radio” (2003) and talk about being brave. Teach them that doing what’s right takes courage.
8
Teen years are a whole other ballgame. Find a community and stay up with trends and news. Check out the website Raising Teens Today.
12
Drinking doesn’t work like climbing a hill, it works like surfing waves. “More” is not always better. Once you feel tipsy, drinking more will make you feel *worse*. Remember “more alcohol will ruin my buzz.” Coast, recover, then okay to start again.
14. 15. 17. 18. 21
Of all the things I worry about, addiction is very high on the list. Begin talks (age appropriate) about addiction.
7
Third or fourth grade is usually a time of friendship drama. Hurt feelings abound. Treat yourself and them gently. Hold space for sadness and frustration. The last thing we ever want to do is to change who we are (what we like) in order to fit in. Good friends encourage you to let your light shine, they don’t mock your light, or imply you should dim it. I don’t care who’s popular, good looking etc, beware of anyone who thinks mean is cool. Gravitate towards kind, weird, talented, interesting, funny, etc. Good vibes are always better than “cool.”
8, 9, 10
Get up early on a Saturday and go downtown. See how fun it is to be up before the rest of the world.
7-9