“Beer muscles” is when guys gain a sense of indestructibility, an exaggerated sense of their own strength. Fights and aggressive behavior ensues.


15



Go as a family to local high school musical productions.


9-13



1

The Language of the Universe: A Visual Exploration of Mathematics https://www.amazon.com/dp/1536215058/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_fabc_R83V51QC1RGYVEZ4ESMQ


8



Your brain seeks novelty. Try new things as long as you live. Take risks (but not safety risks!)


20



No one knows what they’re doing. Just be kind and brave and curious. You don’t have to have it figured out.


17



Self-care is active not passive. (Zoning-out on the couch or sleeping all day isn’t self-care.)


13, 15



“God is gentle and loving. He desires you to have a deep sense of safety in His love.” - paraphrasing Henri Nouwen


16



Born To Dance has lessons and also does birthday parties. A dance class is a good way to get up and out of the house on Saturday mornings during the winter months. It'll be fun at this age - while he's still young enough to enjoy it without being self-conscious. Also a good way to get exercise before he's ready for organized sports.


4-5



The version of you that will handle whatever problem comes your way will be born into existence in the moment when it happens. Trust your future self to handle future challenges.


12, 15, 21



Read The Invisible Boy by Trudy Ludwig.


4



You’re not going to be everyone’s cup of tea. What’s something worth being hated for?


11, 14, 17, 21



Take the family on periodic “spending fasts.” As an exercise, go a day, a weekend or a week without spending any money. Make due with what you have. Encourage participation. Tie in spending fasts with holidays, lent or in support of a cause.


7



Grandpa never wore a watch. (This was way before cell phones existed.) Still, he always knew what time it was, and he was never, ever late.


14



You’ve been entrusted with so much. Think about how much of an honor that is, and how big a responsibility.


16, 18, 21



An exercise in assumption. Have them answer “Just because I _______” doesn’t mean _________”.


10



Ask “What are you going to teach ME?” Let him work on something to teach.


11



Define success for yourself. Be wary of becoming a corporate coal miner. Why bust your $@!#% for years and in school so you can bust your $@!#% for years in a soul-sucking job? Regardless of compensation that is not success in my book. How do you define success? For me it's "Do good. Have fun. Belong to a tribe. Meaningful work with people you love.Make enough money to pay the bills and not have to worry about the basics."


17



Anger is the bodyguard of sadness.


14



Sponsor a child in a developing country. Write letters, learn about their country and their life.


8



Try house music for focus. Spotify “uplifting trance” playlists. Better than Adderall by a mile.


12, 13, 16



Chemistry is not the same thing as compatibility.


16, 19, 21



Kitchen Commandment: She who cooks the dinner shall not clean up from dinner. I don't want to raise any of you to take housework for granted. It's hard. It's unfair and not cool to expect anyone (parent, spouse, roommate, etc. )to wait on you.


7-18



Book: “victory. Stand!” By Tommie Smith


14



Go for walks together as a family before or after dinner. Sometimes we go for distance, sometimes we call them "safaris" and look for as many living creatures as we can find.


4



Shirts and pants don't go into the laundry inside-out. From now on, they will be responsible for turning their laundry right-side-out. Will help instill that laundry is not done by the laundry fairy.


4



Grandpa always said everything boils down to how you treat people. Always treating people with kindness and respect is the most important lesson he wanted to get across to us.


12-21



Work towards your goal. If you screw-up, fix it. The worst thing you could do is give up just because you made a mistake. Nobody’s perfect. Keep going!


14, 19



Enrich your mind. Refresh your body. Renew your spirit. - Andrew Weil, MD.


13, 16, 19, 21



You never know what people are going through. Depression, PTSD, anxiety could look like avoidance, anger, risk-taking, promiscuity, etc. Look out for friends, coworkers and loved ones who may be in pain. You don’t need to solve their problem, just allow for the possibility that they’re going through something. Try to give them the benefit of the doubt and not write off “bad” behavior as a character flaw. Offer a non-judgmental ear.


15, 20