Not all babies are born healthy. There’s grief over that, a painful letting go of hopes and expectations, but eventually parents begin to dream different dreams for their baby. You have it within you to love deeply
21
Learning to keep your composure and maintain a respectful tone when you’re frustrated/angry/afraid/upset, etc. is a skill. PRACTICE it.
4, 5, 6, 7, 10, 12, 14, 16, 19, 21
If a girl is drunk she cannot consent. Don’t even think about hooking up when your partner is intoxicated. It’s immoral and illegal. No excuses. No exceptions. . Break this law and you will be (rightfully) charged with rape and you will get sent to prison.
15
Self-care is active not passive. (Zoning-out on the couch or sleeping all day isn’t self-care.)
13, 15
Bedtime often goes to sh*t in a hurry because kids are tired and parents are out of patience. Be kind. If your kids are anything like you, they’ll need extra tenderness at bedtime: cuddles, soft words, prayers. Forgiveness for the ridiculous tantrums over silly stuff. Take pity on them, their little bodies are tired and they haven’t learned how to function on empty.
1-4
Be yourself. No need to pretend to like something the crowd is doing. Half of them are probably just as unenthused as you are but are afraid to say so.
12, 15
“I need help. But I don’t know what I need help with. Could you ask me a few questions and help me figure it out?” Keep this one in your back pocket.
5, 7, 11, 13, 16, 19, 21
“Praise in public. Discipline in private.” This is good advice for when you’re a parent and for when you’re a boss.
20
Painful or unpleasant emotions can’t grow if you stay in the present. (Easy way to do this is to focus on your breathing.)
10, 13, 16, 21
Let's all go on a "complaining diet." See how long we can go without a complaint for a weekend. Repeat often.
9-15
make your own latch board / "busy board" for plenty of hours of learning and entertainment. Find lots of great ideas on Pinterest.
1-2
My mom did laundry twice a week: Tuesdays and Saturdays. She separated colors! It never piled up and we all had clean clothes. I do laundry daily, it's never done and we can't find what we need. Ask Grandma what was her secret to the science of laundry. Because it's now your job to do all your own laundry!
14
A person’s friends are a reflection of their character. Pick friends who you can be yourself around. Look for partners who have close friendships, a circle of friends who think highly of them.
14, 17, 21
You don’t have to go to college, but whether you do or not, I implore you to read. If you’re like me a slow reader, pace yourself but keep at it. Read bestsellers and classics. Fiction, biography, history, art, every damn thing. A big regret of my life is that I never tried to love reading as a kid. Do yourself a favor and carve out time to read every day. Even if’s it’s just a few pages. Your mind will sharpen and your heart will be full and your soul will be fed.
10, 12, 14, 15, 16, 21
Trust me when I tell you that one day you’ll look back and realize you judged people unfairly and you held strong to convictions only to end up changing your mind about in the light of life experience. Leave a little space open for second impressions or the possibility that you could be wrong.
17
Struggle is just part of the process. It doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong or you’re dumb. It’s a key element of how we all learn.
11
Once a relationship goes from loving someone as they are to trying to change them into something you want them to be, it’s doomed. We can challenge, inspire and educate those we love, but in the end we have to accept them as they are and embrace them warts and all. (They’re doing the same for us.)
18
Imagine hearing the apology you need to hear. Often times that really helps, even if the person never actually says it. It makes it easier to forgive and move on.
18
You should feel safe with friends. They shouldn’t try to get you hurt or in trouble. Anyone who makes you feel unsafe is not your friend.
8-15
You don’t have to be friends with people you don’t like. But you can’t decide you don’t like someone unless you get to know them. (Rather than a look or a reputation or a difference, etc.)
10