Respect people’s boundaries / quirks. Someone who “doesn’t fly” may have fear of enclosed spaces due to anxiety or past trauma. Someone who doesn’t drink may have had a parent who was an abusive alcoholic. Don’t laugh, question or prod. If they want to talk about it, fine. Otherwise just accept their boundaries.


15, 21



Thinking of asking her out? Want to apply for a job that sounds great? Remember you start off at “No.” You currently do not have a date with her. If you ask and she says no, you’ve lost nothing.


15, 17, 21



Be extra careful when you’re parking or pulling out of a driveway. It’s hard to see little kids or pets.


16



I want to talk about when NOT to join in. Friends are great and feeling like we belong feels so good. But there are times I hope you muster the courage not to go along: Never cause anyone or anything pain in order to be liked. Don't confuse cruelty for humor. Never participate in things that may cause harm to yourself or others. Can you think of some things you want to make sure you don't go along with?


11



Don’t worry if they’re not listening to what you say...They watch what you do. They study it.


13



Practice not putting stuff off. If it takes 10 seconds or less do it now. Then move up to 30 seconds or less. Keep going up to ~3 minutes. Good example is putting away laundry or emptying dishwasher, etc.


15



Journal! I forget who said it but it’s so true: we don’t know how we think until we see what we say. Talking into a voice memo app or writing in a journal will help you process and grow.


13, 15, 19, 21



“It’s alright to be yourself. There ARE people in this world who will love you.” -Fred Rogers


12, 14, 17, 21



Try house music for focus. Spotify “uplifting trance” playlists. Better than Adderall by a mile.


12, 13, 16



There’s a great scene in Game of Thrones where Tyrion is trying to prepare for an impending siege of the city but he doesn’t know how to begin planning a defense. Until he starts thinking about how his enemy is most likely to attack. Defense is reactive, offensive is proactive.


19



You can love someone and still not tolerate their abuse. Protect your peace and safety.


17, 21



There IS such a thing as coming on too strong. Err on the side of leaving them wanting more.


15, 18, 21



Staying calm is 90% of the battle. Practice.


13, 15, 18, 21



You are 100% replaceable at work. You are not replaceable at home. A good work ethic is crucial but don’t drain yourself to the point that you don’t have anything left for your family and friends.


21



An exercise in assumption. Have them answer “Just because I _______” doesn’t mean _________”.


10



Geocaching


5-11



Numbing doesn’t work. Let it hurt, let it heal, then it lets itself go.


15,21



ALWAYS pee before you sit down to nurse a baby.


Infant-1



When you’re trying to make a positive change and you get sidetracked- don’t fret. Get right back to it as soon as possible. If you backslide into a bad habit, or blow your diet, etc. start back eating right with your next meal (not the next year/ month/week or even next day.) It’s not the falling off the wagon that hurts your progress, it’s the STAYING off the wagon. Everyone flubs-up sometimes. Don’t quit striving toward your goal because you slipped up. Get right back to it!!


14, 17, 21



Grandpa used to keep a hundred dollar bill stashed discreetly in his wallet “for emergencies.”


17



Just for the record, I didn’t vote for Trump. I want my great-grandchildren to know that.


18



1

Most people are good. Some are bad. Many are crazy.


15, 21



Always wear an undershirt with a dress shirt.


15



Read everything Brene Brown ever wrote.


20



Sad but important fact: You’ll never be enough for some people. Never. -Chasten Buttigieg


18



Visit Aunt Janet in Morehead City for Seafood Festival in October


2-99



You have to be in a good place to be able to make good choices. If you’re run-down, sick, grieving, addicted or in a really bad relationship, etc. you won’t be able to make healthy choices. It’s a catch 22 I know. My point is that you have to take care of yourself (or get help) so you can be in a position to make healthy, good choices.


17, 21



Try not to say insulting or hurtful things, but NEVER write them. (Texts, notes, emails, etc.)


11



Make a pound of ground beef go further by adding chopped cabbage or mushrooms.


19



Get really clear about what you want so that you’ll be able to recognize it when it’s here. Get really clear on the kind of relationship you want so that you can realize when it’s not with the person you’re seeing.


17, 21