“I need help. But I don’t know what I need help with. Could you ask me a few questions and help me figure it out?” Keep this one in your back pocket.


5, 7, 11, 13, 16, 19, 21



Brennan Manning lectures and books.


19



Keep a pair of nail clippers in the car - much better lighting outside. Clipping tiny fingernails is terrifying!


Infant-1



Think about God as the driver of our car or the pilot of a plane- He gets us through the storm, he shows us and encourages us to enjoy the beauty of the scenery. But all the while He keeps us with him. He doesn’t cause the storms, He gets us through them. We can trust in his goodness and wisdom even when the conditions are really scary.


5, 12



Get book “Talk to Me First: Everything You Need to Know to Become Your Kids'Go-To Person about Sex.” by Deborah Roffman.


7



One of the most important things I can teach you is to help you learn how to deal with big feelings without resorting to destructive behavior or violence. Everyone on the planet will experience loss, disappointment, grief, heartbreak, betrayal, etc. Tools to deal with these feelings: counseling, journaling, art, music, exercise, meditation, breathing exercises, yoga, being in nature, talking with friends, joining a support group, movement like dancing or skating, singing, acting, anthropomorphic dialogue with your emotions, naming your emotions and describe how they physically feel in your body. Asking the emotion what it needs you to know.


1Infant-20



Watch Abby Wambach's 2018 Barnard commencement address together.


16



Quoting Glennon Doyle: “Things can feel hard and sad and still be exactly right, all at the same time.” She’s referring to her divorce but the sentiment applies to all kinds of tough choices that we all make. Very few choices feel 100% right.


17



Most times there isn’t a “right decision.” You make a decision and then it’s up to you to *make* it right.


12, 16, 19, 21



Give baby a banana before bed and they’ll sleep through the night. (Obviously once they’re on solid food.)


1



Never consent to a search. Ask if it’s required. If not, no search. If yes, ask for your lawyer.


17, 21



Test


1-2



1

There's an old saying that goes something like "Don't focus on how big your problems are, focus instead on how big your God is." On a certain level, that's way too simple, even trite. But without discounting the real pain you might be experiencing in a moment of crisis, I encourage you to embrace that sentiment. You can't forget about the problem, but you can change your focus, and decide to cling to the goodness of the Lord.


15



“You can miss a person every day and still be glad that they’re no longer in your life.” — Oprah Winfrey


19



Institute a “leave by” time instead of a curfew. That way they won’t panic / speed if something out of their control happens to make them late. “Leave Riley’s house by 10pm.”


13



Work towards your goal. If you screw-up, fix it. The worst thing you could do is give up just because you made a mistake. Nobody’s perfect. Keep going!


14, 19



Processing an emotion means you’re not acting on it or avoiding it, you’re just with it. I like to picture it as a person and then imagine having a cup of coffee or a beer with it. Hope this helps you. xoxo


13, 16



Zoom out! Perspective is your friend. At certain times in our lives we have the focus turned up so high that we don’t see beyond ourselves. (Adolescence is one of those times, totally natural.) Zoom out. You’ll feel better.


13, 15, 17, 21



It’s hard to want something and not have it. Kids have to learn how to sit with that.


3-17



Here’s the thing: some whacky $@!#% is about to go down. The next few years will be interesting, awesome and awful all at once. We will rely on kind and respectful communication, have as much fun as we can, forgive often, learn to let go and trust, and learn to be trustworthy. If necessary we will seek the advice of experts and the counsel of loved ones. Shifts can happen fast, for the better or worse. It seems like the end of the world but it’s not. You’re stronger and braver than you know.


11, 12, 13



You can love someone and still not tolerate their abuse. Protect your peace and safety.


17, 21



Mackinac Island trip


10



Be yourself. No need to pretend to like something the crowd is doing. Half of them are probably just as unenthused as you are but are afraid to say so.


12, 15



“You don’t emerge from $@!#% empty-handed” a friend once told me. Even the worst periods of your life will bring gifts. Be thankful for those gifts, and enjoy them.


19



There are all kinds of parenting and mommy blogs with good resources. A quick Google search will get you started.


Infant



Teach car maintenance: Adding air to tires, checking oil, etc.


13-17



“Racism is real, even if you aren’t a racist. White privilege is real, even if you don’t feel it. Police brutality is real, even if the cop you know is kind. Your world isn’t the world. Everything is not about you.” -Mohamed Safa


16, 21



Never post a pic to social media that you wouldn't want Grandma to see. NEVER send or ask to receive naked pictures. It's tacky, gross, illegal and not worth it. Even if "everyone does it". It's rude and disrespectful.


11-13, 18



Discuss the concept that “It’s not always about you.” Some days need to be about supporting someone else in their joy - or sorrow. Your needs take a backseat.


11, 14, 17