Ask “Is your belly full?” Instead of saying “Clean your plate!” Have them stay in touch with hunger/food connection.


3



Never post a pic to social media that you wouldn't want Grandma to see. NEVER send or ask to receive naked pictures. It's tacky, gross, illegal and not worth it. Even if "everyone does it". It's rude and disrespectful.


11-13, 18



Knowing something is right and application of it are two different things. To apply yourself takes discipline. Practice it.


15



Spread kindness like confetti.


12, 21



George Lucas’ documentaries on WWI, Russian Revolution, etc.YouTube Lucas Films.


14, 17



“Bullies are scared people hiding inside scary people.” -Michelle Obama


8-12



Practice being embarrassed. Tell embarrassing stories. Help them learn how to deal with the sensation.


9



Start something new and let yourself revel in being bad at it. Paint badly, dance badly, write badly, play badly. Keep at it, and don’t let yourself get discouraged. Eventually you’ll be good at it!


15, 21



Gambling is a very tricky thing. It can get out of hand easily because of how the brain works. That initial “rush” of excitement starts to burn pathways, and causes chemical reactions that need to be fed more and more. Before you know it you’re gambling more often and with more money, trying to achieve that rush. Be very, very careful with gambling. Gambling casinos and online gaming know this and they exploit it to make TONS of money. It’s a scam. Avoid gambling all together or step away very early.


16, 18, 19, 21



Follow your dreams…not your boyfriend’s.


16



Google the “tea metaphor” for a discussion about consent.


17



Look into YMCA “family camp” in PA.


7



Educate yourself. You can't solve a problem if you don't understand it.


14-21



Look up crowd cow for meat delivery.


10



Let it go. They’re going to make really stupid choices. I drank AND smoked in high school. We all go through it. They need to be able to trust you and rely on you. They’re navigating the world and they need a safe harbor. Be that safe harbor. It’s more important than fighting over stupid behavior. Let them know you don’t approve - sure, but fighting over stupid stuff is just going to make you both bitter.


14, 15, 16, 17



You’re going to be okay if your relationship ends. You were a whole person before them and you’ll be a whole person after. - therapy Jeff


15, 21



You were THREE years old when you caught sight of a half-dressed beautiful woman. You didn’t have much of a vocabulary yet but when your eyes got wide and you said “BAM BAM” I knew exactly what you meant. (Woman was Jessica Biel in an Adam Sandler movie.)


14, 21



Talk about de-escalation techniques.


15



Teach tuck to drive


15



Let them borrow your calm. Little ones (grownups too) sometimes just need to freak out a bit. Stay there. Be near. Don’t judge or even help. Just be there, and stay calm. Your loving energy is all they need as they work through it themselves. Keep them safe but other than that don’t help or advise unless they ask.


2-6, 17, 21



Keep in mind the human tendency (rightly or wrongly) to think “how it ends is how it was”. Could be a work shift, a class, a relationship, etc. try to end on a good note.


16, 21



Life is for the living. It’s okay to move on. It’s okay to laugh and dream, work, to party, to rest rest, etc. you honor the dead by living your life. Everyone meets up in the end anyway!


19, 21



Make a Shutterfly book for each year and give it to them on their birthday.


5-18



“Never allow anyone to be humiliated in your presence.” - Eliezer "Elie" Wiesel


12, 14, 17, 21



Remember your training and staying calm and kind is how you get through this. It’s all you need to excel. So do your homework, whatever it may be. Show up and have at it. Calm and kind, baby. You got this.


9, 12, 14, 18, 21



When something is upsetting you...Name it...Take a deep breath...Imagine holding it gently in your hands. (This is a reminder to use this visualization myself and to teach it to you. I want to give you as many tools as I can to help you learn to cope with negative emotions in a healthy way.)


11



1

You don’t have to be friends with people you don’t like. But you can’t decide you don’t like someone unless you get to know them. (Rather than a look or a reputation or a difference, etc.)


10



“You matter to me.” Is a beautiful way to express your feelings when a relationship is new.


15, 17, 21



Sad but important fact: You’ll never be enough for some people. Never. -Chasten Buttigieg


18



Give them the book Starfish by Lisa Fipps.


12, 14