Practice “doing without” (or “going without.”). Even young kids can learn the concept. Nobody get everything they want. Sometimes it’s harder than others, but it’s not the end of the world when we have to do without something we want.
4-11
Dating advice: If they like you, you’re gonna know. If they don’t, you’re gonna be confused.”
16, 21
When making decisions or setting goals etc, approach from the perspective of your truest self. That’s integrity.
14, 18, 21
Most brilliant TED talk I ever saw on living authentically. Step one: decide what you don’t give a f*ck about. Step two: don’t give a f*ck about those things. Always be kind and polite but never be sorry for not giving a $@!#% about stuff you don’t give a $@!#% about.
14, 21
Get up early on a Saturday and go downtown. See how fun it is to be up before the rest of the world.
7-9
Depression can look a lot like a bad attitude. Try reacting to his chronic edginess with “Sounds like you’re in pain. You can come to me about anything, any time.”
15
If they’re not doing anything dangerous, illegal or immoral, let them be. Give them space and independence. (Just first define dangerous/ illegal/ immoral. Then remind them that you are here and would love to hear about anything they want to share.)
14
If it’s the right thing, if something needs to be done… Make yourself do it. You’re never going to “feel like it.” Practice daily with things big and / or small without complaining.
9, 12, 15, 21
So what you can. If you’re overwhelmed or depressed, and I can’t get it together to brush your teeth, rinse with water. Tomorrow, rinse with mouthwash. In a few days, brush without bothering to put toothpaste on the brush. This is a pretty extreme example but u get the picture. If you can’t do a load of laundry, just pick up the clothes into a pile. Tomorrow separate the pile. If you can’t face doing a full leg day at the gym, do one rep. Just do what you can, and eventually you will get up to speed. Give yourself grace, my love.
15, 17, 21
Two instances when exercise is unhealthy: when you’re only doing it because you want to lose weight or because you’re terrified you will gain weight.
14, 18, 21
On a job interview, mention a high-level educational goal such as MBA or law school. Their estimation of you will go up without them even realizing it. Your offer will be higher. Also follow, up with a brief but we’ll-written (professional) thank you note/email whatever.
17, 19, 21
That uneasy, uncomfortable or even downright painful feeling you get when you’re faced with something that challenges you ... resist the urge to run away from it. Take a breath and just sit with it for a minute. That feeling you’re feeling is growth. Growth always hurts a little bit. Give yourself a beat to get adjusted before you decide if you want to stay or turn back.
7, 11, 14, 18, 21
I want you to remember that for the first three years of your life I couldn’t take a poop without you on my lap. So there will be no shirking hugs from Mom now that you’re a teenager. xoxo
14
Healing doesn’t mean becoming the best version of yourself. It’s learning to love even the worst parts about yourself.
17, 21
If you want people to believe you, trust you and be able to depend on you, then you must have integrity. Integrity means that you tell the truth, don’t deceive or cheat, you keep your word and you pitch in to help with little things and big things without having to be asked. Who are the people you know who have integrity? Do you want to be a man of integrity?
13, 17
If you don’t have anything intelligent to say on a subject it’s fine (encouraged) to say nothing. Listen. Learn.
20
“You don’t emerge from $@!#% empty-handed” a friend once told me. Even the worst periods of your life will bring gifts. Be thankful for those gifts, and enjoy them.
19
When something is upsetting you...Name it...Take a deep breath...Imagine holding it gently in your hands. (This is a reminder to use this visualization myself and to teach it to you. I want to give you as many tools as I can to help you learn to cope with negative emotions in a healthy way.)
11
“You rarely have time for everything you want in this life, so you need to make choices. And hopefully your choices can come from a deep sense of who you are.” -Mr. Rogers
15
“There is no such thing as a “bad kid” - just angry, hurt, tired, scared, confused, impulsive ones expressing their feelings
7, 12
Help them develop a positive attitude. http://www.momentsaday.com/10-activities-help-young-children-develop-a-positive-attitude/
5