“Pick a problem - any problem,and do something about it. Because to somebody who is hurting, ‘something’ is everything.” -Oprah Winfrey


12-16



The next world is perfect and permanent. This world is neither, so save yourself the stress of trying to make things perfect (house, job, body, relationships, bank account, etc.) Embrace the impermanence by cherishing the good times. Know that the bad times won’t last. Remember that you are loved very much, and that God will shower you with the grace you need to handle whatever this imperfect life throws at you.


21



“Bullies are scared people hiding inside scary people.” -Michelle Obama


8-12



Google the “tea metaphor” for a discussion about consent.


17



If you don’t have anything intelligent to say on a subject it’s fine (encouraged) to say nothing. Listen. Learn.


20



Check out teen life coach Coaching with Will.


13



Some kids have trouble with learning how to managing their anger and other big feelings. We all do! It’s good to give them grace. But steer clear of those who think mean is cool. You don’t have time for anyone who actually tries to be an a-hole.


6, 9, 12, 16, 21



Purchase the card game CBT 123 on Amazon. (Cognitive Behavior Therapy teaches kids the connection between Thoughts/ feelings/ behavior)


7



Motivation: Just start. Two minutes. You don’t need to feel good to get going, you need to get going to give yourself a chance to feel good.


16



You are always responsible for how you act, no matter what you’re feeling. (Or whether you’re drunk or in any way impaired.) Hammer this point home for the next 10 years!


13



Ask smart questions. More importantly, ask stupid questions! So many people are afraid of looking stupid that they totally fake understanding. Even in the very highest levels of career and society. Ask basic questions if something doesn’t make sense. Start at a kindergarten level understanding of a concept then build on it.


15, 20



Plan a trip to Disney this year.


6



This! Your energy is beautiful and precious. Don’t waste it on people who are $@!#% bent on negativity. https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMRxcJWem/


16



You may lose a relationship but you keep the love. It becomes a part of you. It changes you for the better.


15, 19, 21



No matter how late you are, don’t speed or drive unsafely. It’s not worth someone’s life or limbs.


18-18, 21



Apollo 13 and The Martian Great movies about space, science, engineering, etc. Watch together.


12



Date all kinds but marry someone who loves you for who you are, with whom you feel most yourself. Someone who will encourage you to grow more into the person you want to be. (And be good at encouraging them to do same.) Never fear or stifle each other’s growth. Celebrate it. Support it. Encourage it.


21



Visit Aunt Janet in Morehead City for Seafood Festival in October


2-99



There’s no sense in giving up yourself in order to be liked by people you don’t know (or like!) Like what you like. Love who you love. Be who you are. There’s nothing to fear.


13, 16, 18, 21



Men worry about getting laughed at or rejected by a woman. Women worry about getting killed when they reject a man. Let that sink in.


15, 21



Relationships can end beautifully and bravely. They’re not all going to be forever. It’s much better to grieve the end of a relationship than to endure an unhealthy one.


15, 19, 21



One of the funny/sensitive things about puberty is that kids can be the same age chronologically while being wildly varied in terms of development. Kid might be 6 feet tall in seventh grade or be a senior in high school and still not shaving. Everyone is self conscious, praying to avoid embarrassment. It’s all just part of growing up. Be kind to yourself and to your equally mortified peers.


11, 12, 13



Once or twice a year my parents would clean all the walls and baseboards in the house. Every time I smell Murphy’s Oil Soap I think of that. They mostly separated work around traditional gender roles but only insofar as that’s what they liked. Mom had no desire to work in the yard, Dad didn’t like to cook (until he got a bread machine for his retirement!) They often worked together on big tasks no matter inside or outside. Teamwork! And clean walls.


21



Explain what “On my honor” means.


8



Look into "OK Go" videos.


7-14



Try out Petra Lingua online language courses for kids. (Ages 3-10)


4



“Your warmth can be an invitation that unlocks their own.” - Elizabeth Lesser. I love this quote because it’s so true that when you’re kind and genuine, people respond. They take it as a signal that you are a safe place for them to express themselves, which will enable a true connection to be formed. You both win when that happens.


15, 21



If someone wants to leave you, let them. Don’t waste your energy trying to prove your worth to anyone.


14, 19, 21



Guard your health and fitness as if it were your most valuable possession. (It is.)


14, 17, 21