Marriage vows won’t “fix” anything about a relationship. They won’t change how a person communicates. Never start out a relationship with the hope or expectation that your partner will change (or if they are hoping you will change.)It’s not fair to either of you. Everyone deserves to be loved for who they are, not who they could be.


21



Don’t be “too” sure of yourself. There’s always a chance you could be wrong, so be open to what others are saying and consider the possibility they could be right. They very easily could know stuff you don’t. Their experience could be a lot different from yours, so just be careful of insisting you’re right.


15, 21



Read Big Magic by Liz Gilbert. Re-read every 5-10 years.


19, 21



Parent the way you want your children to behave. Compassion, patience. Loving.


1, 2, 3, 4



The Buddhists say “life is suffering.” I think struggle might be a better word. Struggle is unavoidable, and it would do us good to stop expecting otherwise. And yes, everybody experiences pain and loss, etc. but I don’t believe we should expect our lives to be full of suffering.


17, 21



Change always brings feelings of unease. It’s easy to confuse that feeling of unease with the feeling that something must be wrong. Give yourself time to adjust before deciding if a new thing is bad..


14, 18, 21



Surround yourself with people and ideas that inspire you and captivate you. Life is too short for destructive relationships.


13, 18



I wish you had known my father he was such a good man gentle and loving. One early memory I have of him is that one night in our neighborhood I was hit by a bike - a boy was riding his bike and road up on the sidewalk and ran right into me. The bike hit me in the face with the handlebars and I was knocked down before I knew what happened. My father scooped me up and carried me back home. I was crying the whole time. the funny thing is I don't remember the pain, but I very clearly remember being in his arms and hearing the clip clop clip clop of his shoes. It was an after dinner walk - he was still in his suit from work and he had his loafers on and made a clip clop on the sidewalk I will never forget the feeling of being carried in his arms as he hurried back to the house to take care of me. I was in pain but I knew I would be OK. I miss him very much and I wish you knew him.


15



Just let a sweet moment be. There’s a time for jokes or small talk, but sometimes silence is best.


15,21



It is my daily mood that makes the weather. I possess tremendous power to make life miserable or joyous. I can be a tool of torture or an instrument of inspiration, I can humiliate or humor, hurt or heal. ____ In all situations, it is my response that decides whether a crisis is escalated or de-escalated, and a person is humanized or de-humanized. ____ If we treat people as they are, we make them worse. If we treat people as they ought to be, we help them become what they are capable of becoming.” — Haim G. Ginott, Teacher and Child: A Book for Parents and Teachers (Re-ticket this every year.)


6



It’s okay to not understand things. Just be sure the only place your ignorance leads you is to education.


15, 19



Paying extra for organic isn’t always worth it but I ALWAYS buy organic apples. They taste better and don’t have the pesticides, etc.


18



Don't say anything out loud that you wouldn't want repeated or overheard. Don't email / text, etc. anything that you wouldn't want forwarded.


11-15



1

Make a separate piggie bank together for money to donate. Talk about how we manage what we have thoughtfully: Save some, spend some, donate some.


5-8



Play up your strengths. What are your strengths? What are you really good at or love doing?


13, 17, 21



Avoid bird seed or pet food near your home. It attracts mice, rats, ticks, etc. keep bird feeders that use seed a good distance from the house. Try liquid feeders near windows. Or use a feed tray or hulled seeds (little waste.)


20



Practice people skills: Firm handshake, introducing yourself, being courteous when encountering / being on receiving end of someone’s rude behavior, offering your seat (never sit while someone with gray hair, pregnant belly, any sort of injury or really anyone who is older or who works harder is standing.)


10



Approach difficult conversations looking to learn something, not to prove something.


16, 21



Your brain seeks novelty. Try new things as long as you live. Take risks (but not safety risks!)


20



Toddler not interested in food? Hand them a random kitchen gadget to play with while you’re feeding them dinner, they’ll eat more if distracted.


1,2



My mom used to say that one thing her mom taught her was no matter how poor they were they always had a clean house. She made sure of it.


18



General rule for health and happiness: avoid excess.


10, 14, 17, 21



Show them a picture of a riptide and explain about swimming parallel to the shore instead of fighting it. Google Outer Banks NC green fluorescent dye in riptide.


9-15



Challenge yourself every day, in one way or another. Mentally (read!) Is there any room for growth in an area you are struggling with? physically (take your pick but never take stupid risks with your safety), emotionally (allow yourself to be vulnerable. Apologize.), spiritually (pray/meditate/ fast.)


13, 17, 21



Look into going to college abroad. Research international universities. Spain, Netherlands, etc.


15, 16



Awesome game we did at preschool - play I SPY. Try with objects or emotions, such as "I spy something sad" or "I spy something joyful." To help him learn empathy.


3-5



Beware that when you’re first exposed to a new thing: a car, a college tour, house, etc. you will feel AMAZING and totally seduced by the shiny newness. Be cool. Remember that glitters is not gold. Things don’t need to be perfect and even if the house is it doesn’t mean life will be.


15, 18, 21



Getting your drivers license will depend not only on government requirements (age, passing tests, etc.) but also maturity and trustworthiness.


14



When baby has prolonged diarrhea and her butt is really sore, mix a concoction of 50/50 Aquafor and Mylanta to use as a diaper cream.


Infant-2



The moment you lose your cool, you’ve lost.


12,13, 14, 15, 16, 21