Don’t ask for anything until you’ve done what has been asked of you.


5



Save where you can. Spend when you have to. Splurge every once in a while.


15, 21



Before a play date or sleepover ask the parent “Are there any unlocked guns in the house?”


6-9



I’m going to keep from telling them how to feel.


4-18



You can (and should) pray for help. But remember, you have to do your part too. Depending on the situation it could be a little or a lot, but don’t just sit back and expect to be rescued. Moses had to dip his toe in the Red Sea before God parted it. Ask for help, but do your part.


14, 21



Kids Can Make a Difference is a great resource for teaching little kids about poverty and equality.


6-10



Honestly I think all religions are at least fifty percent bull pucky and none of them come close to reflecting the loving nature of God, which is broader and deeper than our little brains can grasp. So pick your poison. Whatever religion feels like home, like a place that can provide context for you to explore the goodness and beauty at the heart of the universe…that’s the religion for you. And if no religion fits the bill, that’s fine too. Either way, always remember and keep coming back to the knowledge that you are so very loved.


16, 21



On a job interview, mention a high-level educational goal such as MBA or law school. Their estimation of you will go up without them even realizing it. Your offer will be higher. Also follow, up with a brief but we’ll-written (professional) thank you note/email whatever.


17, 19, 21



You’re not going to be everyone’s cup of tea. What’s something worth being hated for?


11, 14, 17, 21



“Never let anyone tell you who you are. SHOW them who you are.” - Kamala Harris


12, 13, 17, 21



Kitchen knife skills. Know how to properly and safely cut, slice, chop, dice, carve, etc.


15, 21



Just show up. That’s all we can really control. Show up, (don’t run) and take it from there. You got this.


21



Imagine hearing the apology you need to hear. Often times that really helps, even if the person never actually says it. It makes it easier to forgive and move on.


18



Songs hit so much different (better) when you read the lyrics while listening. Headphones help heighten the experience too.


12, 14, 19, 21



If you’re going to be wrong about someone, let it be because you believed the best of them. (Give people the benefit of the doubt.) put it this way— I’d rather be wrong about my husband being a moral person who would never cheat, then come to find out he had done, than I would like to be wrong about him being a horrible person only to find out later he was faithful all along.


20, 21



Never trust your tongue when your heart is bitter. Hush until you heal.


12, 18



Read The Invisible Boy by Trudy Ludwig.


4



Fire drills. Practice what to do, where to go if the house is on fire. Have an escape plan.


5-10



Sometimes there’s nothing else to do with the pain except to use it to build a new life.


13. 17, 19, 21



Check out Travel for Teens for summer travel programs. Let them choose from themes like service, adventure, animal rescue, etc.


14



The opposite of addiction is connection. Genuine connection can take lots of forms.


14, 17, 19, 21



No dating while unstable. Being responsible for someone’s heart means being prepared to treat them with respect at all times, regardless of whether they make you angry, jealous, annoyed, rejected, humiliated or heartbroken. If (a) you don’t think those things could happen or (b) think there’s a reasonable chance you’d lose your temper, then you’re not ready. And that’s okay! You’ll get there in your own time. In the meantime stay off the market.


12, 14, 16, 18, 21



I did my best to guide you, but I’m sure there are many areas where my take is just not aligned with yours. That’s okay! Bunny please don’t feel any obligation to believe what I believe or take any advice, or continue any tradition mentioned in this Coda.


21



One of my favorite things is the smell of celery and onion being sautéed in butter. It’s the smell I woke up to on so many Thanksgiving mornings as my mom was making the stuffing.


21



If they like you you’ll know. If they don’t you’ll be confused.


15, 21



Set up a 529 plan. Virginia has a great plan if you don't want to do too much research https://www.savingforcollege.com/


birth-age 3



Always wear an undershirt with a dress shirt.


15



Look into summer jobs at national parks.


15, 17



Pour energy into what’s right with you and see what happens.


20, 21