If you don’t have the words, borrow them. Send a song or a poem. As long as the sentiment is yours, the vowels and consonants don’t need to be.


13, 16. 21



When u drop someone off make sure they’re safely inside before you drive away.


15



You’re getting stronger by the day. Use your strength to protect, never to intimidate. Abusers and bullies are cowards and just the worst of men.


14, 17, 21



My Nana, born around 1913, used to decry “some people think the world owes them a living.” A hundred years later I agree. Nothing worse than entitlement.


13, 15, 21



Find an activity / sport that they enjoy and support it. Get them outside and in the fresh air.


6-16



Your sex life should be safe, happy, healthy and consensual. It may or may include going all the way. There’s no rush, every relationship is different. You should feel safe and so should your partner. A lot will be a mystery but you should feel safe. You should be able to trust that your partner won’t intentionally hurt you, emotionally or physically. If you don’t trust your partner to keep you safe, get out.


17



When disciplining remember: First acknowledge the emotion, then address the behavior.


2-4, 13, 15



Avoid the tendency to obsess over someone. It’s not romantic, it’s self-destructive. You’re worth more than that.


13, 15, 17, 19, 21



NEVER sit while someone near you is working.


14-21



Remember that your tend to act like/ think like the people you hang around most. Choose your friends (and your spouse) wisely.


10, 14, 21



Sesame Street has great resources on teaching finances to little ones.


4-5



Practice not putting stuff off. If it takes 10 seconds or less do it now. Then move up to 30 seconds or less. Keep going up to ~3 minutes. Good example is putting away laundry or emptying dishwasher, etc.


15



Read The Invisible Boy by Trudy Ludwig.


4



“Remember Divas and Friends, if you don’t think good things about yourself, how do you expect anybody else to?” - Sheryl Lee Ralph


11, 12. 14. 16, 17, 19, 21



Let’s talk about hungry kids. What can we do to help? Donate? Volunteer? Start a Little Free Pantry?


7-12



Once or twice a year my parents would clean all the walls and baseboards in the house. Every time I smell Murphy’s Oil Soap I think of that. They mostly separated work around traditional gender roles but only insofar as that’s what they liked. Mom had no desire to work in the yard, Dad didn’t like to cook (until he got a bread machine for his retirement!) They often worked together on big tasks no matter inside or outside. Teamwork! And clean walls.


21



Live a life of dignity and joy.


14, 21



Difficult conversations: Break-ups, layoffs, etc. happen. Practice delivering bad news and getting bad news.


15-21



“The next generation never learns anything from the previous one until it’s brought home like a hammer.” - Harry Truman


13, 16, 21



When disciplining remember: First acknowledge the emotion, then address the behavior.


2-4, 13, 15



1

“You have to meet people where they are. Sometimes, you have to leave them there.” -Iyanla Vanzant


21



Cut people some slack, everyone is entitled to a bad day.


17-20



A lesson from author Tom Zumba. I hope you’ll never need it: “There is nothing nothing easy about this thing called grief. Nothing. But I ask you to please please please say yes more often than you say no. Say yes to you. To possibility. To hope. To love. To life. To healing. Please choose the light more often than you choose the darkness. Not that there aren't gifts in the darkness. There are. But it's often so much easier to find them the gifts in the light. Do all you can to stay in the light. Please remember that the person you love so so so dearly lived. Don't forget that. He lived. She lived. Here with you. And your relationship continues. Always. Don't be so overwhelmed and paralyzed and pissed off that he died that she died that you spend most of your time focusing on their death. Focus on your life. Together. Say yes as often as you can. Choose light as often as you can. Remember that he lived as often as you can. Don't lose her in the details of her death. This thing called grief is hard hard hard work. But you are stronger than you think. His book is called Permission to Mourn


21



In social situations it's better to talk too little than too much. Don't over-share with people you're not close to.


15



Read “Attack of the Black Rectangles” by Amy Sarid King.


12



“First the pain. Then the waiting. Then the rising.” Glennon Doyle


16, 21



Talk about how choices become habits. Habits can become addictions. Describe how pathways are literally dug into the brain and it's very hard to change them once those paths are made.


13-16



2

Great article on making math fun: https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/how-to-get-reluctant-children-to-embrace-math/2014/03/04/4be99e46-959d-11e3-8461-8a24c7bf0653_story.html


6



If you ever borrow someone’s car, return it with a full tank of gas.


20



“People are in your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. Pain comes when we try to put them in the wrong category.” - random therapist I never met.


16