I want you to remember that for the first three years of your life I couldn’t take a poop without you on my lap. So there will be no shirking hugs from Mom now that you’re a teenager. xoxo


14



When something is upsetting you...Name it...Take a deep breath...Imagine holding it gently in your hands. (This is a reminder to use this visualization myself and to teach it to you. I want to give you as many tools as I can to help you learn to cope with negative emotions in a healthy way.)


9-11



“People are in your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. Pain comes when we try to put them in the wrong category.” - random therapist I never met.


16



None of us sit high enough to look down on anybody.


11, 14, 17, 21



Challenge: Memorize and recite The New Colossus by Emma Lazarus.


10



Let people do what they want to do so you can see what they’d rather do.


16



Let go of things that aren’t good for you. Anger, fear, prejudice, obsession, grudges, snark, etc.


16, 21



Always wear an undershirt with a dress shirt.


15



Just because I forgive you, it doesn’t mean I trust you. Trust has to be earned.


15, 18, 21



Staying calm is 90% of the battle. Practice.


13, 15, 18, 21



There are all kinds of ways people end up destroying their lives in an attempt to cope with fear, loneliness, stress, grief, boredom or anxiety, etc. A few: Drug/alcohol addiction, gambling, shopping/ spending addiction, hoarding, sex addiction, fundamentalism/ extremist politics, workaholics, deadbeats. Nobody starts out trying to be an addict or a nut. It happens when you continually choose to avoid dealing with the pain or anxiety you’re feeling. Choices become habits. Habits can form addictions. That’s why it’s SO important to find healthy ways to deal with difficult feelings or situations. What makes you feel better when you’re upset? A shower, a run, music, a game, friends, quiet time, being outdoors ... There are lots of ways to take good care of your spirit. Keep choosing them. Ask for help when you’re not able to make good choices on your own.


14, 17, 19, 21



“There is no such thing as a “bad kid” - just angry, hurt, tired, scared, confused, impulsive ones expressing their feelings


7, 12



Focus on the lesson not the pain.


14, 21



Trust fall. Learn to be vulnerable. You can’t say the wrong thing to the right person.


12, 16, 19, 21



Just for the record, I didn’t vote for Trump. I want my great-grandchildren to know that.


18



1

“Those who cannot change their mind cannot change anything.” -George Bernard Shaw...... As you live and love and learn, your views will evolve. It takes courage to grow.


16



Big secret to happiness: Let other people talk sh*t about you. They have a right to an opinion and you have the right to ignore it. The only standards you have to live up to are your own.


12, 14, 17, 21



The most important things I can teach you is how to love and be loved


14, 19, 21



What do you think about the word “refugee?” Let’s talk about what it means. Personally, I don’t understand all the complexities of immigration policy, but I figure anyone who escapes violence and walks hundreds of miles with kids in tow, trying to get to safety and gain an opportunity for a better life for their family can live next-door to me anytime.


13



My favorite version of myself is when I’m not worried about what others think of me. I


11, 13, 15, 17, 21



When making decisions or having a disagreement, it’s very easy to get stuck in defense of your position because we just feel so strongly about it. Without realizing it, we can discount good alternatives and or fail to see the strengths of other people’s viewpoints. As an exercise to avoid getting caught in this trap, make a habit of listing 3 reasons why you might be wrong. Stretch to accommodate the possibility that your strongly-held belief just may be wrong.


14, 18, 21



ALWAYS pee before you sit down to nurse a baby.


Infant-1



There’s a great scene in Game of Thrones where Tyrion is trying to prepare for an impending siege of the city but he doesn’t know how to begin planning a defense. Until he starts thinking about how his enemy is most likely to attack. Defense is reactive, offensive is proactive.


19



Adopting a “do it right now” mentality has done wonders for my organization


10, 12, 16



Look up crowd cow for meat delivery.


10



Dream big. Work hard.


18



Don't say anything out loud that you wouldn't want repeated or overheard. Don't email / text, etc. anything that you wouldn't want forwarded.


11-15



End of August by Robert Frost is one of my favorite poems.


20