There's an old saying that goes something like "Don't focus on how big your problems are, focus instead on how big your God is." On a certain level, that's way too simple, even trite. But without discounting the real pain you might be experiencing in a moment of crisis, I encourage you to embrace that sentiment. You can't forget about the problem, but you can change your focus, and decide to cling to the goodness of the Lord.
15
Getting your drivers license will depend not only on government requirements (age, passing tests, etc.) but also maturity and trustworthiness.
14
Talk about how to be a good houseguest: Always bring something (food, wine, gift, etc) Make your bed, keep area clean. Enthusiastically accept your host’s hospitality but don’t make extra work for them. Contribute and pitch in where u can. Send a thank you note - or at very least, an email!
18
"The only way to work through sh*tty feelings is to walk through sh*tty feelings." - Psychologist Kristen Howe Hard lesson, but big truth.
15
Know the difference between an inconvenience and a tragedy. Hint: If it can be fixed with money or effort, it’s probably not a tragedy.
15, 20
Talking to people you disagree with is sometimes difficult. But it doesn’t have to be. Enter every conversion assuming you have something to learn.
14, 18, 21
Alcoholism and gambling addiction run in our family. Be very, very careful around booze and gambling.
14,16, 18, 21
“You don’t emerge from $@!#% empty-handed” a friend once told me. Even the worst periods of your life will bring gifts. Be thankful for those gifts, and enjoy them.
19
Just fill ‘em with love. Every other parenting mistake or deficit can be fixed, but if a child grows up thinking it’s not loved and doesn’t have a place in this world, that is a recipe for permanent and painful damage. Not necessarily “spoil” them, but cut them slack as often as possible. Just love ‘em up.
Infant-21
Special occasion gift idea: put a video together of a ton of friends and family wishing them the best. Maybe it’s graduation, or wedding or big move, or for when she’s in labor, etc. Ask friends and family to film a short video of encouragement/congratulations/support/advice/etc.
17, 20, 21
Every time your heart breaks, your vision gets better. You appreciate beauty and recognize and respond to others’ pain better.
12, 15, 18, 21
There is all kinds of darkness in the world- disease, accidents, natural disasters, etc. But the worst darknesses are man made: War, violence, poverty, injustice, indifference. Push back against all of it as much as you can. Light will beat the darkness in the end. Fight on the side of the light. Love, truth, beauty, creativity, connection and compassion.
20
“Where you stand depends on where you sit.” It means your personal situation informs your stance on issues. Try to imagine how you’d vote if you were sitting at a less privileged place.
15, 21
"You think your pain and your heartbreak are unprecedented in the history of the world, but then you read." ~ James Baldwin
14, 19
Sometimes fear feels like a signal to get out of there, but being uncomfortable in a new situation is totally normal. Practice sitting in that discomfort and you’ll find it gets easier.
9, 12, 15, 17, 21
“It takes about 20 years to build a reputation and 5 minutes to ruin it. If you think about that, you’ll do things differently.” - Warren Buffett
12, 14, 16, 19, 21
Compete for the last meatball at Sunday dinner: Biggest burp, telling the best story, finished vegetables first, etc.
5
Have them practice making trade offs based on their financial priorities. For example: Pedicure or movie?
9
Whether it’s a kid at school or a politician on tv, beware of someone who tries to blame the world’s problems on a minority or some other group of people who are different. It’s a cheap tactic to get people riled up and afraid.
13
When someone suffers the loss of a loved one, don't shy away. Go to the service. Check in during the months following. Say the name of the person who died when you talk to them. Forward pictures of the loved one if you have any, share stories. There are exceptions to this, so always take your queue from the person who is grieving.
18
Happiness: Someone (or some creature) to love, something to do and something to hope for. Don’t get too caught up in the rat race, money doesn’t mean you’ve arrived.
20
Eat with purpose, not for it. Sometimes the purpose is fuel, sometimes celebration. Eat accordingly!
19, 21
“It’s okay to be sad. It’s okay to grieve. Because you can also live your life, and love your life, and be happy too.” Excellent advice from 9/11 survivor.
12, 15, 19