Remember that whoever you’re grieving would only want the best for you.


20



Practice “doing without” (or “going without.”). Even young kids can learn the concept. Nobody get everything they want. Sometimes it’s harder than others, but it’s not the end of the world when we have to do without something we want.


4-11



Watch Abby Wambach's 2018 Barnard commencement address together.


16



Shirts and pants don't go into the laundry inside-out. From now on, they will be responsible for turning their laundry right-side-out. Will help instill that laundry is not done by the laundry fairy.


4



Read Harry Potter series to him / with him.


9-10



Doing something you don’t want to do just to look cool is the opposite of cool.


9, 11, 14, 15, 19, 21



The next world is perfect and permanent. This world is neither, so save yourself the stress of trying to make things perfect (house, job, body, relationships, bank account, etc.) Embrace the impermanence by cherishing the good times. Know that the bad times won’t last. Remember that you are loved very much, and that God will shower you with the grace you need to handle whatever this imperfect life throws at you.


21



Surround yourself with people, places and spaces that feed your spirit. At the very least, avoid those that drain your spirit.


17



Go on a tour of the Kennedy Center. Free guided tours through Friends of the Kennedy Center.


10



Grandpa used to describe injuries and medical procedures as “It’s a nothin.” I think of this every time I have to endure something painful.


14, 18



Apollo 13 and The Martian Great movies about space, science, engineering, etc. Watch together.


12



Compete for the last meatball at Sunday dinner: Biggest burp, telling the best story, finished vegetables first, etc.


5



“I need help. But I don’t know what I need help with. Could you ask me a few questions and help me figure it out?” Keep this one in your back pocket.


5, 7, 11, 13, 16, 19, 21



"You think your pain and your heartbreak are unprecedented in the history of the world, but then you read." ~ James Baldwin


14, 19



Soothe a newborn: Swaddle , shushing noise, swing, side/stomach position, suck on a binkie. Read The Happiest Baby on the Block by Dr. Harvey Karp (or watch the video.) It' a life-saver.


Infant



Whatever your first knee-jerk reaction is, it’s not always the right one. Sleep on it.


14, 17, 21



Teach him what to do and how to act if he gets pulled over.


16



Share Brene Brown's short video on Empathy vs. Sympathy: Be the bear, not the goat. Fantastic 3 minute video. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Evwgu369Jw&feature=youtu.be


12, 14, 18, 21



You can’t grow in faith (or character or friendships) without learning to be humble. To forgive. To listen without agenda. To allow for the possibility you may be in the wrong. Ask for help. God will give it.


16



I’m cool with “C”s. Do good work but don’t put too much pressure yourself.


14



Teach them to clean the bathroom. Wipe down surfaces, clean mirrors, etc. It’s their job to keep it tidy. Everybody pitches in to keep up with housework.


4-18



Say it early and repeat it often, so that it sinks way down deep: There is nothing you could do to make me stop loving you. No mistake, no failure, no decision, nothing. There is no hole so deep that if you fell into it I wouldn’t climb down to help you out of. I love you no matter what.


7



Enroll in a CPR course. Re-certify every year.


13



No matter how late you are, don’t speed or drive unsafely. It’s not worth someone’s life or limbs.


18-18, 21



“How we learn to hold what hurts shapes so much of who we are. What we choose to do with our pain defines us more than most things.“ -Chani Nicholas


11, 14, 17



Practice not putting stuff off. If it takes 10 seconds or less do it now. Then move up to 30 seconds or less. Keep going up to ~3 minutes. Good example is putting away laundry or emptying dishwasher, etc.


15



Celebration and acknowledgment: Make a big deal over little-big things and teach them the same: getting their braces off, or a cast on a broken bone, a friend gets a new car, etc. Always acknowledge the sad that someone is going through or the difficult situation. Applies to all ages.


12, 15, 19, 21



Choose to love despite the rage. See poem by Lucas Jones “ I Will Teach My Sons to be Dangerous Men.”


12, 14, 16, 19, 21



Changed behavior is the only real apology.


15



Do something that feeds your soul every day. Experience or create joy, even if just a small spark of it.


17