When I say I want you to be happy I’m not talking about pleasure and ease. I mean purpose and pride you in yourself, meaningful work, and a solid group of friends and family who loves you for who you are, so you don’t ever have to pretend to be something you’re not.
21
You’re someone’s cup of tea. I don’t mean there is only one person out there for you, I mean someone is waiting to love you exactly how you are. Stop wasting time with fools who want to change you to fit their ideal.
15, 19, 21
“Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak. Courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen.” - Winston Churchill
16, 21
You will come to rely on whatever you choose to help you feel better. You may even become addicted. So choose carefully. Rely on creative, positive, spirit-affirming practices to replenish yourself. Don’t fall in to the trap of alcohol/ food/gambling/smoking/sex/shopping, etc. to numb your pain or avoid dealing with difficulties. ________EVERYONE feels stress, anxiety, loss, despair, frustration and a while bunch of crappy feelings at some time or another. It’s okay to feel those things. But how you choose to DEAL with those feelings will determine a great deal in how happy your life will be.
12, 14, 16, 17, 21
Be the kind of man that people feel safe around. Safe from harm, safe from judgment and safe from ridicule.
17
Never enter into (or stay in) a relationship with someone based on their “potential.” It’s a recipe for misery, resentment and frustration.
19
Google earth app means there's always a globe at hand. Point out states, countries or oceans when we hear about them.
4-9
Toddler not interested in food? Hand them a random kitchen gadget to play with while you’re feeding them dinner, they’ll eat more if distracted.
1,2
Speaking truth to power is important but should be done carefully. Before you speak remember this: Is there anything self-serving, mean-spirited, or ego-driven? If you’re sure your feedback isn’t tinged with those things, then I’d say you can be comfortable telling it like it is. Note: when you’re young (less than 30) WAIT to be asked before you spill your guts! Always be kind, professional and consider what you want to say carefully.
21
When things get scary, look for the helpers. This is true in physical crises and existential ones. SCOTUS just passed down a few truly horrifying rulings, including reversing Roe v Wade. I’m disheartened in all that’s going on, but was reminded to look for the helpers, the activists, etc. Look for them…and join them.
10, 15, 21
Talk about how choices become habits. Habits can become addictions. Describe how pathways are literally dug into the brain and it's very hard to change them once those paths are made.
13-16
You’re not going to be everyone’s cup of tea. What’s something worth being hated for?
11, 14, 17, 21
Cotillion and other social clubs abound in our area. They usually start around 5th or 6th grade. start looking into what might be a good fit. Lay the ground work that they will attend.
1Infant-12
Work towards your goal. If you screw-up, fix it. The worst thing you could do is give up just because you made a mistake. Nobody’s perfect. Keep going!
14, 19
One of the best things you can do for yourself is to cultivate a hobby. Anything positive/creative you can throw yourself into.
11, 13, 17, 21
It's natural to avoid change. Try to learn to accept change, embrace it if you can! Change is good. :)
15
No need to over communicate. Brief, simple succinct when conveying instructions or important information. Applies across the board personal/professional etc.
14, 17, 21
One of the funny/sensitive things about puberty is that kids can be the same age chronologically while being wildly varied in terms of development. Kid might be 6 feet tall in seventh grade or be a senior in high school and still not shaving. Everyone is self conscious, praying to avoid embarrassment. It’s all just part of growing up. Be kind to yourself and to your equally mortified peers.
11, 12, 13
Look for examples of people who have dealt with loss without giving in to bitterness. What do they have in common?
17
Getting your drivers license will depend not only on government requirements (age, passing tests, etc.) but also maturity and trustworthiness.
14
Letting go isn’t something active. Rather, it’s something you stop doing. Stop hoping. Stop fooling yourself. Stop wishing things were different.
17, 21
I heard a song today, “I love you to the bone” by Sammy Copley. It’s a beautiful story of a lifelong love. It’s my prayer for you that your spouse will have that song played at your funeral after you shared a 75 year- long happy marriage. It’s my prayer that your life is filled with love and laughter, and most importantly a partner who grows with you in all good things. And that you love each other to the bone.
21