Grandpa was a Marine, though you’d never know it. Slight in build and oh-so gentle natured. But underneath he had a good bit of grit. He never complained. He once told me “You can stand any amount of pain for a little while.” (Basically saying suck it up and hang in there until help arrives.) I’ve never forgotten it.


18



Let them borrow your calm. Little ones (grownups too) sometimes just need to freak out a bit. Stay there. Be near. Don’t judge or even help. Just be there, and stay calm. Your loving energy is all they need as they work through it themselves. Keep them safe but other than that don’t help or advise unless they ask.


2-6, 17, 21



"Tough times don't last. Tough people do."


11-14



1

One of the best doctors I ever worked with started his day by walking through the office and saying “good morning” to everyone. He’d do the same before he left at the end of the day, just making sure everyone was ok, to call him if they needed anything, etc. I don’t know what your career will be but if you’re in a position to do so, I hope you’ll adopt this habit.


21



When you feel hopeless that’s when you know it’s time to seek help. It’s a red flag in someone’s demeanor. Notify parents if you notice this feeling of deep despair in yourself or someone you know. Help really does help.


13, 15, 17, 19, 21



Mom’s scrambled eggs: Use fresh eggs. Scramble vigorously. Don’t add water or milk, just cook in copious amount of butter. Add salt and pepper.


12



Never do two illegal things at the same time. Don’t break the law while breaking the law.


16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21



Be extra careful when you’re parking or pulling out of a driveway. It’s hard to see little kids or pets.


16



Begin planning trip for 10th bday. Maybe to Atlantis in Bahamas or someplace he’d be excited about._____Get him involved in planning and saving.


8



Golf lessons. Grampa loved golf, if he were here he would have taught you himself.


9



When making decisions remember HALT: are you hungry, angry, lonely or tired? (Or ecstatic) Give yourself time to be in a good place. Ask yourself if you’re choosing something because it’s going to bring you closer to being as authentically yourself or are you trying to meet someone else’s expectations? This is not to say you won’t need to compromise and put others first (spouse/ family.) That happens a lot in marriage. No, I mean ask yourself if you’re trying to prove something or are you being true to yourself. Hope that helps.


18, 21



Never tolerate abuse. But definitely learn how to throw annoying habits and stupid drama in the bucket of the 10% of things you don’t like about being in the relationship. Even the most beautiful stallions poo, everything produces waste. Clean the waste, deal with it as a constant byproduct of life. don’t $@!#% the horse so you don’t have to deal with poo.


17, 21



Just because you love someone doesn’t mean they feel loved by you. Meet the kids where they are.


2, 9, 21



“Just because you think it doesn’t mean it’s true. Your brain’s a little b*^tch and likes to lie to you.” -Elyse Myers


13, 21



You can’t grow in faith (or character or friendships) without learning to be humble. To forgive. To listen without agenda. To allow for the possibility you may be in the wrong. Ask for help. God will give it.


16



Sadness means you need love. (From another person, a pet, yourself.) Someone whose presence brings you comfort. May be dead, living, fictional, historical figure, religious (god, saints, Buddha, etc.) Live and in person is best though. Let someone love you how you need to be loved.


19, 21



Clip nails after bath. It’s easier to do when they’re softer. (Teach them the same thing when they’re old enough to do it for themselves.)


1, 10



Kitchen knife skills. Know how to properly and safely cut, slice, chop, dice, carve, etc.


15, 21



You don’t have to look for love. You definitely don’t have to audition for it. All you need to do is be the most “you” you can be. And if you have no idea what you love or who you are…congratulations! Figuring it out will be the best part.


13, 15, 16, 17, 18, 21



Assume any email or text you send will be distributed.


12, 15



Yoga for kids classes or YouTube


5-8



I don’t want you to do drugs. It could hurt or $@!#% you. If you get caught doing drugs it could hurt your academic record


12, 15, 18



Girls: does he put in the effort even when it’s inconvenient or uncomfortable for him?


16, 20, 21



“Dress braver than you feel. Act braver than you feel.” - Ray


17



Failed? Lift yourself up, or live there. You know the work you need to do, be it physical, mental, emotional or spiritual, etc. So do it. Do the work. The only bitterness in failure comes from not having the guts to get back up again.


12, 16, 18, 20, 21



A hard day’s work is something to be proud of, not afraid of.


8, 12, 15, 20



“Don’t ever let anyone tell you what you see with your own eyes isn’t happening.” -English teacher Read Diary of Anne Frank together.


12



Consent is more than the literal


13, 14, 15, 16, 21



When you meet someone for the first time try to clear your mind of any assumptions about physical appearance. Race, gender, age, handicap/disability, etc.


17, 21



Don’t ask for anything until you’ve done what has been asked of you.


5