Give people the benefit of the doubt. Unless someone gives you a reason not to trust them, assign the best possible motive to their actions.
14-18
We don’t always get what we want. Sometimes we have to wait. Sometimes we go without it. Sometimes when we DO get what we wanted it looks different than how we imagined it would. AND IT’S OK. We’re ok. The world keeps turning! That’s a huge lesson and a valuable one. Practice “pushing the snooze button” on wants. Enlist their help. “I understand you want ____. Would this be something you could snooze or do without?”
5, 10, 20
Make a separate piggie bank together for money to donate. Talk about how we manage what we have thoughtfully: Save some, spend some, donate some.
5-8
Ask “Is your belly full?” Instead of saying “Clean your plate!” Have them stay in touch with hunger/food connection.
3
Define success for yourself. Be wary of becoming a corporate coal miner. Why bust your $@!#% for years and in school so you can bust your $@!#% for years in a soul-sucking job? Regardless of compensation that is not success in my book. How do you define success? For me it's "Do good. Have fun. Belong to a tribe. Meaningful work with people you love.Make enough money to pay the bills and not have to worry about the basics."
17
You have to learn how to not start, and how to stop abruptly when you’re turned on. Doesn’t matter how much you want it, nothing happens unless she gives enthusiastic consent, and nothing continues if she were to withdraw consent for any reason or at any time. Look up the making tea analogy for consent. It’s perfect.
14, 15, 16, 17, 18
Jam is an incredible resource of fun learning activities and projects in a safe online environment. Ages 6-16.
6
Watch The Last Lecture before school starts on a pivotal year, like middle school, high school.
11, 12, 13, 14, 15
make your own latch board / "busy board" for plenty of hours of learning and entertainment. Find lots of great ideas on Pinterest.
1-2
Think about building a career. Take low-paying or no-paying jobs that will give you the experience you need to build it. It's not all about the paycheck, especially when you're young and don't have too many bills to pay.
19-21
To avoid miscommunication and misplaced expectations, tell your partner what you need from them. But if what you need is for them to be a different person, that’s not fair to them or to you. Let them go and set about finding the right person.
18, 20
Be a good guest. Never arrive to a dinner or a party empty handed. Bring a gift: flowers, food, drink, etc.
18
Always stand up to shake someone’s hand. (NEVER shake a person’s hand while sitting.) Always get up out of your seat to greet a guest and walk them to the door when they leave.
13
Don't say anything out loud that you wouldn't want repeated or overheard. Don't email / text, etc. anything that you wouldn't want forwarded.
11-15
Work on controlling temper. Read books about how to reach this at a young age and keep updating the conversation as he grows. He needs to be able to control his temper.
4-7
Clip nails after bath. It’s easier to do when they’re softer. (Teach them the same thing when they’re old enough to do it for themselves.)
1, 10
Gambling is a very tricky thing. It can get out of hand easily because of how the brain works. That initial “rush” of excitement starts to burn pathways, and causes chemical reactions that need to be fed more and more. Before you know it you’re gambling more often and with more money, trying to achieve that rush. Be very, very careful with gambling. Gambling casinos and online gaming know this and they exploit it to make TONS of money. It’s a scam. Avoid gambling all together or step away very early.
16, 18, 19, 21
I love that you got chills from watching Wicked. You were 10 and already affected emotionally and physically by music. Bonus points for listening to and acknowledging how your body talks to you.
13, 19, 21
Have a yearly “review” right before school year. Raise allowance as appropriate. If they want more money, they’ll have to take on more responsibilities.
7-17
Choose to love despite the rage. See poem by Lucas Jones “ I Will Teach My Sons to be Dangerous Men.”
12, 14, 16, 19, 21