Professor Scott Galloway’s advice: Paraphrasing his standard wedding toast:
“1. Express affection and desire. Everyone wants to be wanted. It’s healthy and it is part of what makes your relationship singular.
2. Never let your wife / girlfriend be hungry or cold. Two thirds of the really awful arguments you’ll have it’s because someone is hungry or cold. Carry blankets and protein bars. (You’re welcome.)
3. Don’t keep score. Decide what kind of friend / son / daughter / spouse / employee / human being you want to be, and practice being that. Put the scorecard away.”
Pedestrians get hit all the time. Be aware when you’re driving OR walking.
Wear reflective gear if walking at night.
Stay off your phone when driving OR walking.
For a bad cut / gash, use a rolled up washcloth or hand towel to apply pressure until you can get to an ER.
If you have to drive yourself or need your hands free, secure the towel in place with duct tape.
Trust me when I tell you that one day you’ll look back and realize you judged people unfairly and you held strong to convictions only to end up changing your mind about in the light of life experience. Leave a little space open for second impressions or the possibility that you could be wrong.
Major regret: focusing too much on being liked (or loved.) You can’t *make* anyone love you. Some people just won’t like you… that’s okay. Make yourself proud. Do YOUR thing. Spend time on what matters to you.
If it’s the right thing, if something needs to be done…
Make yourself do it.
You’re never going to “feel like it.”
Practice daily with things big and / or small without complaining.
“First things first!”
It’s a constant struggle to get out of the house or complete a task. Hammer home “first things first!”
After they’re dressed (or whatever task) THEN they can have screen time or playtime free-time, etc.
Don’t be a mooch!
Contribute: To your home, your relationships, your work, your community, your church, your country, the world.
Think about how much you get from all these things. It’s so much more from all these things than you could ever pay back, but that doesn’t mean you don’t try.
Dig in and contribute wherever you can. Never free-load. That’s not who we are. Be brave and contribute your talent, treasure or whatever you can. Duty and compassion both demand it.
Summer Olympics for neighborhood kids. Create events in all kinds of sports, games and skills. Mix it up so the littler ones and the less athletically inclined have something they can succeed at too.
Sadness means you need love. (From another person, a pet, yourself.) Someone whose presence brings you comfort. May be dead, living, fictional, historical figure, religious (god, saints, Buddha, etc.) Live and in person is best though. Let someone love you how you need to be loved.
Check out the Jesuit Volunteer Corp. A short but deeply meaningful immersion into service, faith in action, selflessness and living on a lot less than you think you need.
“Open your eyes and see what you can, until they close forever.” - All the Light We Cannot See by Anthony Dorr. See the world! Learn science, appreciate art and books, meet people and be genuinely interested in them. Engage in the fight for justice, resist fascism and dictators. Share what you have and who you are. Putting up walls is a waste of time. Yes, there will be pain. But you will be able to face it with grace, grit, courage and with the love of others. Make love! But remember if they’re too drunk to drive, they’re too drunk to consent. And be sure you’re both on the same page so you can avoid misunderstandings and hurt feelings (yours and theirs). Don’t kiss and tell. Be protective but never possessive. Just be a man, you know? (man/woman/grownup human.) Be safe - $@!#% is forever.
Thinking of asking her out? Want to apply for a job that sounds great? Remember you start off at “No.” You currently do not have a date with her. If you ask and she says no, you’ve lost nothing.