Go out of your way to part on good terms whenever possible, in all circumstances.


18



“There’s a hole in the side of a boat. It can’t be fixed, it’s never going away, and you can’t get a new boat. This is your boat. What u have to do is bail water out faster than it’s coming in.” -Aaron Sorkin (Newsroom season 3 episode 6.)


17, 21



Never post a pic to social media that you wouldn't want Grandma to see. NEVER send or ask to receive naked pictures. It's tacky, gross, illegal and not worth it. Even if "everyone does it". It's rude and disrespectful.


11-13, 18



You’ve been entrusted with so much. Think about how much of an honor that is, and how big a responsibility.


16, 18, 21



Sometimes, no matter how great a thing is it can’t make up for what it’s not.


14, 19, 21



If you sleep with a girl, always call or text the next day. Don't be a d-bag.


18



If you witness a moment of vulnerability in someone, keep it to yourself. Be respectful of people's dignity.


14-18



Addiction is when you can’t get through the day without something. It’s not that you need to feel high, it’s that you can’t live without what gets you high. Humans are all wired to be at risk for addiction


13, 15, 18, 20



I don’t buy Mallomars. But Santa does. Another Christmas stocking tradition is chicken flickin. Rubber chickens you shoot like rubber bands.


5, 21



Change always brings feelings of unease. It’s easy to confuse that feeling of unease with the feeling that something must be wrong. Give yourself time to adjust before deciding if a new thing is bad..


14, 18, 21



Being numb is not the same thing as being happy.


15-18



Micro-internships. Check out Parker Dewey for ideas.


16, 17, 18



Read the Hobbit aloud with him. Afterward, encourage him to read The Lord of the Rings by himself.


9



We don’t snoop. Never read a correspondence (email, letter, text, note, etc.) that is not intended for your eyes, or listen in to a conversation that is not intended for your ears. The right to privacy is sacred. Always respect people’s privacy and set the expectation that others do the same for you.


10



Yes, push yourself and see how far / fast / high you can go (physically, academically, etc.) But remember, you have nothing to prove to anyone except yourself.


14, 17, 21



Hike Jones Run Falls at Shenandoah National Park.


11



Birds of a feather flock together


14



Just because I forgive you, it doesn’t mean I trust you. Trust has to be earned.


15, 18, 21



Build something beautiful.


13, 21



There is a cost and a duty to everything we own. Rachel Maddow


16



“How we learn to hold what hurts shapes so much of who we are. What we choose to do with our pain defines us more than most things.“ -Chani Nicholas


11, 14, 17



Watch Abby Wambach's 2018 Barnard commencement address together.


16



Once a relationship goes from loving someone as they are to trying to change them into something you want them to be, it’s doomed. We can challenge, inspire and educate those we love, but in the end we have to accept them as they are and embrace them warts and all. (They’re doing the same for us.)


18



It’s hard to know how to support a friend who is grieving, but it’s a priceless skill / attribute. Some people just are naturally know what to say, but for the rest of us, it can be learned. If you don’t know what to say, just stay silent but be present. Or try something like “I’m so sorry.” Be mindful not to turn away because their pain makes you uncomfortable. Send a text just “thinking of you.” Grief takes a lot of energy and focus, and there’s not much you can (or should) do to help someone process their pain. So lessen their burden by taking some of the stupid everyday life stuff off their plate: Walk the dog, make a meal, make sure there’s food, clean clothes, toilet paper, etc. Help with school or work stuff if possible. Check in often but take your queue from them. Some people want company while others want solitude. Everyone processes pain and grief differently. Don’t force your way on them. Offer to look at pictures or hear stories about the person they lost. This time is about them, so avoid any comparisons with how what they’re going through is similar to something you or someone else went through, unless it was the exact same thing: Telling someone who lost a child that you understand their pain because your grandmother died last year is not okay. People mean well but they say really stupid sh*t sometimes. (If you ever say something that may have caused pain, just acknowledge it, apologize for it, and move on from it.)There are lots of resources. Grief is so isolating. You can’t make their pain go away, but that’s okay. You’re job isn’t to ‘cheer them up’ it’s to ‘keep showing up.’ Read up on current literature, there are tons of great resources.


19



Frustrated with school or work? It bothers you because you care or you hurt. That’s human.


14



"Love is nothing more and nothing less than relentlessly showing up for your people." - Glennon Doyle


18-21



Kids who are a little different (maybe they make funny sounds, look different, or aren’t able to talk or walk very well, etc.) Remember that just because they might be different, they are never “less than.” Their feelings matter as much as yours. They like to play as much as you. Their families love them as much as your family loves you. Include them as much as you can. You could end up making a great friend!


6



“If we could see our prayers we would never stop praying.” - Bunmi Laditan, by way of her angel.


11, 17



Have a yearly “review” right before school year. Raise allowance as appropriate. If they want more money, they’ll have to take on more responsibilities.


7-17



1