Book recommendation: “Star Fish” by Lisa Fipps.


11



Let's find little ways to practice self-control and build that muscle.


11



Just love them. With all your might, them for who they are, and where they are. Forget about the other stuff.


15



You can’t ask someone to change who they are before you live or accept them.


12, 15, 21



Sometimes it feels really good to say “no.” (Or “no thank you.” Or “$@!#% no!”)


14, 20



“Your soul is more magnificent, beautiful, and gigantic than you can possibly imagine.” From short story “The Egg” by Andy Weir


1Infant-21



Keep your pants on until you (and your partner) are at least 18. Keep your pants on if you or your partner are drunk. Keep your pants on if you or your partner are not 100% enthusiastic about going farther.


15



Read the instructions. Don't ask for help if you've been given instructions but haven't yet read them. RTFM. (Read the flippin' manual.)


14-21



There are all kinds of ways people end up destroying their lives in an attempt to cope with fear, loneliness, stress, grief, boredom or anxiety, etc. A few: Drug/alcohol addiction, gambling, shopping/ spending addiction, hoarding, sex addiction, fundamentalism/ extremist politics, workaholics, deadbeats. Nobody starts out trying to be an addict or a nut. It happens when you continually choose to avoid dealing with the pain or anxiety you’re feeling. Choices become habits. Habits can form addictions. That’s why it’s SO important to find healthy ways to deal with difficult feelings or situations. What makes you feel better when you’re upset? A shower, a run, music, a game, friends, quiet time, being outdoors ... There are lots of ways to take good care of your spirit. Keep choosing them. Ask for help when you’re not able to make good choices on your own.


14, 17, 19, 21



Things are rarely black and white. Most situations (and all people) are complex. A nuanced approach is necessary to understand them. You can’t learn - or love, if you’re judging.


17



You don’t have to lower your standards, just lower your walls.


12, 15, 21



Remember the hymn we used to sing at bedtime when you were little? “What Does the Lord Require of You?” To seek justice. To love kindness. To walk humbly with your God. (Walk humbly means to remember God is so very good. That he loves you and is for you and wants you to talk to him, listen for him, love him, serve him.) No matter what religion you practice (or don’t practice) I hope you’ll remember that.


17



Challenge yourself every day, in one way or another. Mentally (read!) Is there any room for growth in an area you are struggling with? physically (take your pick but never take stupid risks with your safety), emotionally (allow yourself to be vulnerable. Apologize.), spiritually (pray/meditate/ fast.)


13, 17, 21



Changed behavior is the only real apology.


15



You can (and should) pray for help. But remember, you have to do your part too. Depending on the situation it could be a little or a lot, but don’t just sit back and expect to be rescued. Moses had to dip his toe in the Red Sea before God parted it. Ask for help, but do your part.


14, 21



Never say anything behind someone's back that you wouldn't say to their face.


11, 14, 18



To paraphrase Ted Lasso, it’s the people who think they’ve got it all figured out who delight in judging people and events. It’s better to be open minded, ask questions. Be curious, not judgmental.


15, 21



There are a lot of people I care about. But I’ve decided there are only four whose opinion of me I care about: My kid, my god, myself and my dog.


18



Sad but important fact: You’ll never be enough for some people. Never. -Chasten Buttigieg


18



If baby / toddler is melting down, put them in the bathtub or bring them outside. A change in temperature will calm them.


Infant-4



“You belong in every room you enter.” - Shonda Rhymes


6-21



You always have a choice. Always.


15, 19, 21



Sometimes I think the best way to take care of them is to teach them to take care of others: Littler kids, sick or disabled, those who’ve been left out.


5-7, 1Infant-12



Of all the things I worry about, addiction is very high on the list. Begin talks (age appropriate) about addiction.


7



That uneasy, uncomfortable or even downright painful feeling you get when you’re faced with something that challenges you ... resist the urge to run away from it. Take a breath and just sit with it for a minute. That feeling you’re feeling is growth. Growth always hurts a little bit. Give yourself a beat to get adjusted before you decide if you want to stay or turn back.


7, 11, 14, 18, 21



Throw some love at a problem.


12, 15, 21



Look into YMCA “family camp” in PA.


7



Great article about teaching young kids how to do better than “I’m sorry” when they’ve caused another child pain. https://offspring.lifehacker.com/what-to-say-to-little-kids-instead-of-say-sorry-1819288365?fbclid=IwAR0bKgo60isKj6a5D2s3cs1leWCIyK9TXTBK62upV9U1S_bR0otfJndwg_k


3, 8



Writing is thinking.


14, 17. 21