Marry your hero.


21



Pay attention to what people do and what they say. Try to look past their appearance. This is especially true for women, who are almost always judged primarily on the way they look.


12, 15, 19



Failures are part of life. Feel free to fail. But behave with honor. Never do anything to tarnish your good name.


14, 18



Ask them “what would it take for you to_____?” (Keep your room clean, stay on top of your homework, feel like you had more control in this situation, etc.) Instead of nagging or lecturing, just ask.


13



Jump in and help where help is needed. Don’t wait to be asked. Whether it’s clearing dishes at home or friend’s house or tasks at work. It could be something big like solves problem or little, putting paper in the copy machine at work.


15, 18. 21



When you meet someone for the first time try to clear your mind of any assumptions about physical appearance. Race, gender, age, handicap/disability, etc.


17, 21



We all have dark thoughts and moods every once in a while. That’s part of being human. But any sustained ideation or inclination to hurt yourself or someone else is a red flag and needs mental health intervention.


12, 14, 17, 21



In social situations it's better to talk too little than too much. Don't over-share with people you're not close to.


15



1

“Fitting in” requires that we change who we are to fit someone else’s idea. True “belonging” never asks us to change who we are, it demands that we be who we are. - Brene Brown


12, 17



Find one or two scary documentaries on the dangers of gambling. Watch together. Betting on sports is a big thing in some schools and I want to scare the $@!#% out of him about how bad gambling can screw up his life. Check online tools from gamblers anonymous.


15



Look up crowd cow for meat delivery.


10



Be open to the possibility that you might be wrong.


12, 14, 17, 21



The mind replays what the heart wants to heal.


16



Practice staying calm under pressure. The pop-up game “Perfection” is a fun way.


10, 12, 15, 17, 21



Colin Powell’s 13 rules: 1. It ain't as bad as you think. It will look better in the morning. 2. Get mad, then get over it. 3. Avoid having your ego so close to your position that when your position falls, your ego goes with it. 4. It can be done. 5. Be careful what you choose. You may get it. 6. Don't let adverse facts stand in the way of a good decision. 7. You can't make someone else's choices. You shouldn't let someone else make yours. 8. Check small things. 9. Share credit. 10. Remain calm. Be kind. 11. Have a vision. Be demanding. 12. Don't take counsel of your fears or naysayers. 13. Perpetual optimism is a force multiplier.


11, 14, 18



Procrastinating is an Olympic sport for those of us with ADHD. Talk about ways to get “unstuck.” 1. Change your body - move to a different room or take a walk. 2. If you can’t move your body, move your focus. 3. Ask your brain how it’s trying to help you by paralyzing you. 4. Take deep breaths and let go of the shame and self-doubt you feel for getting stuck.


8, 9, 10, 14, 21



Jazz in the Garden free outdoor concerts at National Gallery of Art. Fridays during summer months.


7



Have them practice making trade offs based on their financial priorities. For example: Pedicure or movie?


9



Have fun at parties! Mingle, dance, participate in the good energy. But if there’s drinking to excess, someone needs to be lifeguard. Young people don’t know how dangerous alcohol can be. And sadly, someone needs to be bodyguard. Men often try to take advantage of intoxicated women.


14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19



Work on developing a “no shortcuts” mode. Looking for a faster/easier/bare-minimum option isn’t always bad. People get paid a lot of money for creating efficacy. But there are times when that approach is wrong. Anything you want to grow from (relationships, school, work, wealth, health, knowledge, etc.) those things deserve your full effort, focus and dedication. Play. Definitely play! But don’t f*ck around.


12, 14, 15, 18, 19, 21



May you make yourself proud every day. That’s my wish for you. (I will always be proud of you.) xoxo


9, 14, 21



Discuss difference between foods that taste good vs. foods that make you FEEL good.


12-14



Imagine a hundred different lives. Try a dozen of them. Fail at most of them. That’s part of what your twenties are for. Challenge yourself. Challenge your assumptions. Change your perspective. Grow.


20



Give books. Inscribe them. Just a line or two can turn a good book into a treasure. Great for any occasion.


17



I’m parenting as in most things, staying calm is more than half the battle. Practice keeping your cool in all situations. No yelling blaming freaking out or meanness. Calm rules the day.


1, 21



Read Elizabeth Gilbert’s book on creativity. Re-read every few years!


17



Caps Game this year.


11



Grit.


14



Universal Studios


12-18



Just do the next right thing. One step at a time, you’ll get there.


13, 18, 21