"Tough times don't last. Tough people do."


11-14



Stay away from anything or anyone that denies or disparages a person’s humanity. (Or a group’s humanity.)


12-21



Fall in love with a person, not a feeling.


19



Be a safe place. Teach them to be a safe place too.


12



“Human beings are linked, not ranked.” - Gloria Steinem (f*ck the patriarchy)


15



Change “I need to” to “this matters because”. Instead of “I need to walk the dog” say “it matters that I walk the dog because he needs exercise and to check p-mail.” (Helps!)


8, 11, 16, 21



Of all the things I worry about, addiction is very high on the list. Begin talks (age appropriate) about addiction.


7



Institute “Family Night” a screen-free night of games and fun and togetherness. Can use these times for conversations about things you want to address / teach. Maybe make theme nights and build around a lesson so it’s fun and enjoyable. Continue through school years.


4-6



My worst fear is that I will be unable to reach you when you’re in pain. All I want as a parent, what my whole job boils down to, is to be there when you need me. How can I help you?


13



Whatever your first knee-jerk reaction is, it’s not always the right one. Sleep on it.


14, 17, 21



Learn what triggers you. It’s probably just two or three things. Work on your issues


14, 18. 21



Approach difficult conversations looking to learn something, not to prove something.


16, 21



My favorite Chinese food order is chicken Kung Pao, shrimp fried rice and beef lo mein. That way we all get a little of each meat.


16



I hope you find a partner with who are your most authentic self, and who you love for who they genuinely are.


15, 21



I just want to to know that I didn’t know what the $@!#% I was doing. It’s a miracle you turned out so beautifully! Just know you don’t have to have it all figured out. You’re going to have a wonderful life. xoxo - Mom


21



Numbing doesn’t work. Let it hurt, let it heal, then it lets itself go.


15,21



It’s okay if you don’t know how (or don’t want) to move on. Start with something easier…just don’t go back.


16



Remember that whoever you’re grieving would only want the best for you.


20



Educate yourself. You can't solve a problem if you don't understand it.


14-21



Just love them. With all your might, them for who they are, and where they are. Forget about the other stuff.


15



There’s a lot of virtue to the “Let them” theory of parenting. It’s their life. Drop out of school? Not what I would want, but as long as I’ve had my say, the decision is theirs to make. The mess will be theirs too, but that’s just life. Stop trying to control everyone and everything. Give yourself and everyone else a break and as long as it’s nothing harmful, let them. Don’t try to bend them to your will, and keep your opinions to yourself.


12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18



Always know where the main water shut-off is in your house.


18



What problem do you want to solve in the world?


1Infant-14



The secret to getting sinks and surfaces to shine is to dry-buff them after you clean them. Keep a soft clean rag or washcloth around so you can dry fixtures and sinks and counter tops. (They should be cleaning their own bathrooms by this age.)


11



Read Harry Potter series to him / with him.


9-10



A Morning Offering by _____ (Excerpt) ...May my mind come alive today To the invisible geography That invites me to new frontiers, To break the dead shell of yesterdays, To risk being disturbed and changed. May I have the courage today To live the life that I would love, To postpone my dream no longer But do at last what I came here for And waste my heart on fear no more.“


19



Rain, snow or sleet...Always return the shopping cart to the proper spot in the parking lot.


17



Let it go. They’re going to make really stupid choices. I drank AND smoked in high school. We all go through it. They need to be able to trust you and rely on you. They’re navigating the world and they need a safe harbor. Be that safe harbor. It’s more important than fighting over stupid behavior. Let them know you don’t approve - sure, but fighting over stupid stuff is just going to make you both bitter.


14, 15, 16, 17



There's an old saying that goes something like "Don't focus on how big your problems are, focus instead on how big your God is." On a certain level, that's way too simple, even trite. But without discounting the real pain you might be experiencing in a moment of crisis, I encourage you to embrace that sentiment. You can't forget about the problem, but you can change your focus, and decide to cling to the goodness of the Lord.


15



Make yourself a good hand. Don't wait to be asked, just jump in when you see a need. Wash a dish, make a bed, change a tire, help out a friend or a stranger whenever you can.


14-20