“Pirate Rules” is a temporary suspension of the usual rules. It means pretty much anything goes for this moment so we can all stay sane. ——-Loosen the rules on snacks, bedtime, screen time, etc. in special circumstances.
They’re very teachable at this age. When behavior is bad, send to their room for a brief “time-out.”
Then go get them by sitting and putting him/her on your lap. Talk (1-3 sentences) about why we don’t behave that way and how I expect you to behave instead. Then hugs and kisses.
If the offense is really bad, introduce consequences (which have to be immediate, they wont understand missing out on something hours from now, won’t make the connection.)
Happiness: Someone (or some creature) to love, something to do and something to hope for. Don’t get too caught up in the rat race, money doesn’t mean you’ve arrived.
Puberty is like putting a 12 year old in the pilot seat of a fighter jet. A total sh*t show at first, then better but still erratic and dramatic until they really get a feel for the speed and the pressure, the gauges, etc. They’ll learn when to question or to trust their instincts. Tell him that he’ll fly this jet for the rest of his life and it will always be dangerous because it’s an effing jet, but he will learn how to fly it expertly. He’ll do good, have fun, accomplish missions and refuel.
One of the best doctors I ever worked with started his day by walking through the office and saying “good morning” to everyone. He’d do the same before he left at the end of the day, just making sure everyone was ok, to call him if they needed anything, etc.
I don’t know what your career will be but if you’re in a position to do so, I hope you’ll adopt this habit.
Stay fit. Try to increase fitness every year in some way: Strength, flexibility, endurance, or a specific sport or practice. Never take your body for granted.
Sometimes I think the best way to take care of them is to teach them to take care of others: Littler kids, sick or disabled, those who’ve been left out.
Sometimes you just have to let go. Let go of a relationship, or a dream, or plans. Let go of a person, a pet, or an object. It's hard. It takes a lot of trust.
Trust the Lord will heal the wound, no matter how deep. His goodness is infinite.
Learn about current trends in social media. Figure out where you draw boundaries, what platforms are allowed and not. Teach them how to stay safe, be positive and kind and always respectful.
My ballet teacher used to punish us by making us sit on the floor and hold our arms up. It hurts! But you learn how to sit with pain. You learn how to endure and how to use your mind to make your muscles really don’t want to do.
Adopting a “do it right now” mentality has done wonders for my self-discipline. Something on the floor? Grab it right now. Thinking about cooking later? Cook right now. Laundry finished? Put them up right now. Home from a trip? Unpack right then. It’s the small things.
***Manners!! *** Etiquette is the secret sauce. Everyone appreciates being treated with respect. Etiquette is the art and science of respecting others. It’s timeless and universal. Customs change, hence the need for constant study, but respect is always the foundation. In summary: Be nice. Start with yourself. Study etiquette. It will help you in every single interaction you have, social, professional, financial, everything. Manners apply to every human, in every interaction, even on the hard days. Hence, the need for practice.
Always have a 5 year plan. Be thinking of goals you want to work towards, however big or small. What inspires you? What drives you? What do you want to accomplish or cure or solve?