Control isn’t safety. Safety is putting in the physical/mental/intellectual/emotional/spiritual work so you’re confident in your ability to address whatever comes your way and thrive, bounce back after getting knocked down.
14, 21
Not all babies are born healthy. There’s grief over that, a painful letting go of hopes and expectations, but eventually parents begin to dream different dreams for their baby. You have it within you to love deeply
21
There’s a difference between looking cool and being cool. A person who wants to look cool is trying to impress other people. A person who is actually cool is true to himself /herself. Dress how it makes YOU happy! And fun fact, it’s those people who are the most well-liked because they sort of give others permission to be themselves…and everyone wants to be seen and liked for who they really are. So if you want to be popular remember three things: Be kind. Be yourself. Don’t judge
12,15
Don’t be a mooch! Contribute: To your home, your relationships, your work, your community, your church, your country, the world. Think about how much you get from all these things. It’s so much more from all these things than you could ever pay back, but that doesn’t mean you don’t try. Dig in and contribute wherever you can. Never free-load. That’s not who we are. Be brave and contribute your talent, treasure or whatever you can. Duty and compassion both demand it.
11-18
Look into going to college abroad. Research international universities. Spain, Netherlands, etc.
15, 16
Stuff is gonna happen! They will make incredibly stupid choices and get into all kinds of trouble. Take a beat. Be radically merciful. THAT is what they’ll remember and that is the lesson they’ll learn.
12-21
Dress to people will listen to you, not look at you. (This is especially true at school and work.)
15, 18, 21
Practice these skills: Love yourself Respect yourself Value yourself Enjoy yourself
4, 6, 8, 12, 15, 17, 21
Share a few of our most embarrassing moments. Teach them it’s okay to laugh at yourself and even when you’re mortified in the moment being embarrassed isn’t fatal. (And it happens to everyone.)
11
Reinforce this at every opportunity: “You matter.” Kids respond to this message deeply, whether it comes from a positive source (parents/teacher/coach) or people who are only trying to exploit them.
2-18
You don’t have to look for love. You definitely don’t have to audition for it. All you need to do is be the most “you” you can be. And if you have no idea what you love or who you are…congratulations! Figuring it out will be the best part.
13, 15, 16, 17, 18, 21
Sometimes you have to put aside how you feel about a person and objectively look at how their actions show how they feel about *you.*
16
Learn about current trends in social media. Figure out where you draw boundaries, what platforms are allowed and not. Teach them how to stay safe, be positive and kind and always respectful.
9
“I don’t give a rat’s $@!#% how much respect u garner out in the world if you don’t show respect and love and serve those you love at home.” ____loosely quoted from Glennon Doyle’s ‘Untamed.’
14, 19
Ask them to think of foods that taste good and also foods that make them feel good. Involve them in lunchbox decisions, dinner planning and prep, etc. so they’re empowered by their food habits.
6-9
“The next generation never learns anything from the previous one until it’s brought home like a hammer.” - Harry Truman
13, 16, 21
Pedestrians get hit all the time. Be aware when you’re driving OR walking. Wear reflective gear if walking at night. Stay off your phone when driving OR walking.
15
Forget perfection. Nothing is perfect. No relationship, job, house, or day is perfect. Let go of expectations, be open to the mess.
18
There is so much darkness in the world - keep pushing back against it every way you can. Be a force for good.
14, 16, 21
Remember the tool of “Yes. But first...” Kids ask for things they want ALL DAY. To avoid saying”no” all day, (and avoid tantrums) don’t say no. Little One doesn’t touch her dinner except for the applesauce. Then she asks “Mommy can I have more applesauce?” Tell her “Yes!” “After you finish your meat and vegetables.”
2