“It’s not your job to make people love you. It’s your job to show people who you are and allow them the opportunity to love you, if they want to. If they don’t, please just let them walk away. They were probably going to walk away anyway, they were just sticking around to see if you’d beg a little bit. Don’t even give them that. Let them go. You’re not a shape shifter. You’re not going to turn into the version of yourself that you think would be more lovable by the person you are trying to be loved by. That’s not love, that’s exhausting.” -Elyse Myers, one of my favorite Tiktokers. You deserve to be loved for who you genuinely are. I wish I’d read this when I was young. Would’ve saved me years of pain and frustration.


16-21



My mom used to proudly describe herself as an “Irish Catholic Democrat.” I think my dad voted for Reagan once but other than that we’re all pretty liberal.


18



Rainstorms are gangrenous- avoid driving in them or being out on foot. I’ve personally known people who have died from lightening strikes (running) and falling tree limbs (in their car. The mom in drivers’ seat and child in front seat both died.)


16



“First the pain. Then the waiting. Then the rising.” Glennon Doyle


16, 21



Pick a project on Instructables.com and work on it together this winter.


7



Educate yourself. You can't solve a problem if you don't understand it.


14-21



Brennan Manning lectures and books.


19



Send thank you acknowledgemnt for gifts received


1-21



1

If you get comfortable telling little lies it will be easier to tell big lies. Tell the truth, even on small matters. (Except if your friends ask if they look fat. Then it’s okay to lie!)


13, 18, 21



Sometimes we’re just not ready to appreciate or understand a book or film or piece of art. Revisit them as you age.


19, 21



Be willing to say “I don’t know” if you don’t know! Don’t just make stuff up.


15, 20



Wipe your kids’ tears when they’re sad. Smile with them when they are happy. Hold them close when they are scared. And let them see your tears, smiles, and fears too. This is how you teach them to be a human in this world.


6



Encourage creativity, science and engineering: Make a craft station / work bench for projects. Fill it with all kinds of art supplies, engineering kits, tools, pegboard, etc. Stock safety equipment like goggles and make sure the area has good lighting. Lots of ideas on Pinterest, etc.


8



1

Challenge yourself every day, in one way or another. Mentally (read!) Is there any room for growth in an area you are struggling with? physically (take your pick but never take stupid risks with your safety), emotionally (allow yourself to be vulnerable. Apologize.), spiritually (pray/meditate/ fast.)


13, 17, 21



Test


20



Check out the website Brightly for timely and age-appropriate book recommendations. All sorts of subjects and themes.


5-12



Do what makes you happy. But what if you’re not sure what that might be? If you’re at a crossroads and you don’t know where you *want* to go, just go where you’re *needed.* That’s a good first step. Trust the Lord to take it from there.


18



Let's find little ways to practice self-control and build that muscle.


11



Talk about how choices become habits. Habits can become addictions. Describe how pathways are literally dug into the brain and it's very hard to change them once those paths are made.


13-16



When you feel like you’re on fire with anger or fear, if you can’t shake it, put that fire to good use.


14



Default to "nice guy." Meaning it should require something significant for you NOT to be nice. Give people the benefit of the doubt. Cut them (and yourself) some slack. Life is hard. We're all in this together.


12



It’s not a project, it’s a practice. (Health, fitness, keeping up with current events, prayer or meditation, housework, reading, etc.)


16



“If you want to be holy, be kind”. -Frederick Buechner


14, 19, 21



Love isn’t enough but it’s a great start.


21



There are things you should not say: Never comment or ask a woman about her age or weight. Never comment on how many kids someone has (or doesn’t have.) The size, timing, composition, etc of someone else’s family is not your business to weigh in on. You never know who is struggling with loss or infertility, etc. And if someone announces they are expecting their seventh kid, the only correct response is “Congratulations” “How are you feeling?” etc. Just like you would if it was their first. Never ask someone how much weight they lost. If they’ve lost weight, just say “You look wonderful/amazing/ fantastic, etc.” And of course never comment on anyone having gained weight. Just say “You look wonderful.” And never never never ask someone how much money they earn or how much money they have, or how much they owe or paid for something, etc. People’s finances are personal, and are just not any of your business.


15, 20



This! Your energy is beautiful and precious. Don’t waste it on people who are $@!#% bent on negativity. https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMRxcJWem/


16



If you ever borrow someone’s car, return it with a full tank of gas.


20



Plan a neighborhood "Winter Olympics" for snow days. Create indoor and outdoor events.


8



Keep in mind the human tendency (rightly or wrongly) to think “how it ends is how it was”. Could be a work shift, a class, a relationship, etc. try to end on a good note.


16, 21



A person is only as good as how they treat you when they are angry with you.


17