Practice sitting and standing "like a statue" to teach them how to be still. Start with a goal of 5 or 10 seconds, gradually move to 2 minutes. Same thing for "silent game" to teach them how to stay quiet when they need to. Bribery helps teaching this concept!


3-4



Small joys are what gets you through big grief.


14, 18, 21



You can’t be a good parent if you’re a miserable person. Take care of yourself. Make the changes necessary to get in a good place. Ask for help. The happier you are, the happier they will be.


1, 10, 15



“I need help. But I don’t know what I need help with. Could you ask me a few questions and help me figure it out?” Keep this one in your back pocket.


5, 7, 11, 13, 16, 19, 21



Avoid love bombing.


15, 17, 21



Give books. Inscribe them. Just a line or two can turn a good book into a treasure. Great for any occasion.


17



If you’re waiting on someone to change for the relationship to work, it’s not gonna work. Love ‘em or leave ‘em. But forget trying to change them. (Same works in reverse. If someone wants you to change something about yourself before they commit, don’t walk away…RUN!)


14, 18, 21



“Tell me the story of your day.” (Works better than “how was your day?”


5, 6, 10



Try to avoid the temptation to reach a conclusion too quickly or cling to it too tightly.” (Paraphrasing James Comey from his book ’A Higher Loyalty,’ which I recommend as a fantastic lesson in leadership - and history, and public service.)


19



Summer concerts at Wolftrap- get good seats so they can really get a sense of the experience.


13-16



Sometimes when you win, you lose. And when you lose, you win. Meaning that sometimes when you get what you want it doesn’t work out well. And sometimes wonderful things happen as a result of a failure or disappointment. Chin up. There’s a million paths to happiness and fulfillment. If one doesn’t work out your will find another.


12, 21



Help him write a letter to someone in power if he has a question or concern about something he sees going on in the world.


7-11



Never post a pic to social media that you wouldn't want Grandma to see. NEVER send or ask to receive naked pictures. It's tacky, gross, illegal and not worth it. Even if "everyone does it". It's rude and disrespectful.


11-13, 18



Read the Hobbit aloud with him. Afterward, encourage him to read The Lord of the Rings by himself.


9



You’re not going to be everyone’s cup of tea. What’s something worth being hated for?


11, 14, 17, 21



“Things are not perfect, because life is not TV and we are real people with scarred, worried hearts. But it’s amazing a lot of the time.” - Anne Lamott


14



Hike Jones Run Falls at Shenandoah National Park.


11



Sometimes I think the best way to take care of them is to teach them to take care of others: Littler kids, sick or disabled, those who’ve been left out.


5-7, 1Infant-12



I’ve stopped worrying about you being able to make your way through life. You’re not even 8 years old and I can see you’re going to be just fine. You’re smart, kind, curious, hilarious and so very lovable. I worry about your safety, I stress about your health, but I don’t worry about your character. I’m so proud of you, and I love watching you grow.


14



Highly recommend book about math and multiplication techniques:“The Best of Times” by Greg Tang.


10



Default to "nice guy." Meaning it should require something significant for you NOT to be nice. Give people the benefit of the doubt. Cut them (and yourself) some slack. Life is hard. We're all in this together.


12



Taken from a friend’s Facebook post: You are holding a cup of coffee when someone comes along and bumps into you or shakes your arm, making you spill your coffee everywhere. Why did you spill the coffee? "Because someone bumped into me!!!" Wrong answer. You spilled the coffee because there was coffee in your cup. Had there been tea in the cup, you would have spilled tea. *Whatever is inside the cup is what will spill out.* Therefore, when life comes along and shakes you (which WILL happen), whatever is inside you will come out. It's easy to fake it, until you get rattled. *So we have to ask ourselves... “what's in my cup?"* When life gets tough, what spills over? Joy, gratefulness, peace and humility? Anger, bitterness, harsh words and reactions? Life provides the cup, YOU choose how to fill it. Today let's work towards filling our cups with gratitude, forgiveness, joy, words of affirmation


12, 17



Long before I was old enough to decide what I wanted my life to be about, I was set on a path of other’s choosing: marriage, kids, Catholic. I took that assignment to heart. Focused like a laser beam. Ironically, I believe that it’s because marriage and a conventional family was my prime directive that I ended up becoming roadkill on that path. My point is twofold: don’t let me or anyone else tell you what your life should look like. Maybe college isn’t for you, maybe marriage isn’t something that appeals to you, maybe it is! Keep exploring until you find a direction that fits your own values and priorities. As long as you’re paying your bills and you’re not hurting anyone including yourself, knock yourself out! Go wild! Do whatever feels right. And if you don’t know where you want to be, go where you’re needed to start with. I love you forever no matter what you do.


17, 21



Painful or unpleasant emotions can’t grow if you stay in the present. (Easy way to do this is to focus on your breathing.)


10, 13, 16, 21



Never open someone else's mail, or listen to their conversation, etc. If it's not your business to know, don't snoop.


14-21



Begin colon cancer screening at 40. We have a family history on both sides.


21



Life doesn’t need to be perfect to be beautiful.


20



You're about to come into a ton of energy and strength. It will seem like a lot to manage at first, but you'll get used to it and learn to use it constructively. Push your limits (within reason.) Challenge yourself.


13



Don't let the laundry pile up. This lessons extends to pretty much every chore: Stay ahead of it and you won't get crushed by it.


17



Some relationships (or jobs) are f*cked, and cannot be unf*cked. Release them and move on.


21