Stuff will happen and you’ll think “I can’t get through this. I can’t go on.” In the moment it really feels that way. But ...You will survive. You’ll find a way. Never give up on yourself. I never will.


17



“Beer muscles” is when guys gain a sense of indestructibility, an exaggerated sense of their own strength. Fights and aggressive behavior ensues.


15



Always hold the door open for the next person.


4-14



Apollo 13 and The Martian Great movies about space, science, engineering, etc. Watch together.


12



It’s okay to take a beat, a pause before you answer: “Hold on, let me think about how this is going to work...” I’ve seen a lot of mistakes or loss of confidence in an employee because they just blurted out a guess or starting off in the wrong direction only to have to go back- just because the plan hadn’t been thought through. It only takes a minute.


15, 18, 20



If they like you you’ll know. If they don’t you’ll be confused.


15, 21



Practice sitting still and quiet. Make it a game. Helps with focus and impulsivity.


4-7



Feelings will run high to low. Most days you'll be middle of the road but some days are really high and some will be devastatingly low. I wish I could change that, save you from the really low days, but they're part of life. Know this: They don't last. I've been there too. Everyone has (or will) question if it's even worth going on. It is worth it. Keep on going, do the best you can. It gets better. SO better. Pull yourself out of it if you can, over days, weeks or months. Bad seasons will pass. Although bad “seasons” are normal, clinical depression is a sickness, a hopelessness that you can't pull yourself out of. It's no more possible to snap out of depression than it is to heal your own broken leg. If you're feeling hopeless. If you start having thoughts of hurting yourself or someone else, that's illness. Medicine, therapy, other medical treatments treat and cure it. There is no shame in asking for help. People can DIE of this because they're ashamed to get help. It's like dying of a tooth ache because you're afraid of the dentist- such a waste. If you ever need help please tell me, or tell another adult you trust. Your life is worth fighting for.


15, 18, 21



Attend a Pride parade.


9



Geocaching


5-11



They’re very teachable at this age. When behavior is bad, send to their room for a brief “time-out.” Then go get them by sitting and putting him/her on your lap. Talk (1-3 sentences) about why we don’t behave that way and how I expect you to behave instead. Then hugs and kisses. If the offense is really bad, introduce consequences (which have to be immediate, they wont understand missing out on something hours from now, won’t make the connection.)


3



Watch the political conventions every election year. Listen and decide for yourself.


17, 18, 21



Never allow anyone to tell you who you are.


17



Read The Invisible Boy by Trudy Ludwig.


4



Train for a mini-triathlon together as a family this year.


12



Begin again. Whether by choice or necessity, sometimes there’s no other option.


15, 21



SAT prep https://www.nytimes.com/2017/04/10/opinion/how-i-learned-to-take-the-sat-like-a-rich-kid.html?referer=http%253A%252F%252Fm.facebook.com%252F


16



Practice “going without.” Talk about how nobody gets what they want all the time. We should learn how to just choose to go without something we want. Get them in on the discussion and pick something every day to do without.


5-9



Talk to people like they belong and are valued exactly as they are in that moment.


12-14, 21



You remember experiences, connections. Not stuff. Don’t get too caught up in stuff.


12, 15, 17, 21



We are all incurably human.


5, 15, 21



Talk about the difference between not feeling comfortable and not feeling safe.


7, 11, 14, 19. 21



The better you eat, the better you feel. (And look.) if you eat like sh*t you’re going to feel like sh*t. Eat your vegetables! xoxo


17, 21



90 seconds or less. No one wants to hear you talk for more than that. (In a personal setting like giving a toast.)


17, 21



“Your goals will kick you in the shins and steal your lunch money.” -Jon Acuff. You have to fight back, even though some days you lose. Failure is part of the process. Keep going.


19



Make yourself a good hand. Don't wait to be asked, just jump in when you see a need. Wash a dish, make a bed, change a tire, help out a friend or a stranger whenever you can.


14-20



That trope “everything happens for a reason” is, I think, b.s. But I absolutely agree that you can find meaning in anything good or bad.


17



Our nervous systems are just trying to keep us safe. If you were thrown into fight/flight/fawn today, give yourself some grace.


14, 21



When u drop someone off make sure they’re safely inside before you drive away.


15



Encourage others!!!


13