Just because someone is an a-hole it doesn’t mean they’re wrong.


17, 21



Get book “Talk to Me First: Everything You Need to Know to Become Your Kids'Go-To Person about Sex.” by Deborah Roffman.


7



Trying to avoid the real work makes the task 100 times harder. Do the work.


9, 15, 21



Feelings will run high to low. Most days you'll be middle of the road but some days are really high and some will be devastatingly low. I wish I could change that, save you from the really low days, but they're part of life. Know this: They don't last. I've been there too. Everyone has (or will) question if it's even worth going on. It is worth it. Keep on going, do the best you can. It gets better. SO better. Pull yourself out of it if you can, over days, weeks or months. Bad seasons will pass. Although bad “seasons” are normal, clinical depression is a sickness, a hopelessness that you can't pull yourself out of. It's no more possible to snap out of depression than it is to heal your own broken leg. If you're feeling hopeless. If you start having thoughts of hurting yourself or someone else, that's illness. Medicine, therapy, other medical treatments treat and cure it. There is no shame in asking for help. People can DIE of this because they're ashamed to get help. It's like dying of a tooth ache because you're afraid of the dentist- such a waste. If you ever need help please tell me, or tell another adult you trust. Your life is worth fighting for.


15, 18, 21



Golf lessons this year. Your grandpa loved golf. He tried to teach me when he first got sick, and those are some of my best memories of him. Great way to get fresh air and exercise too.


11



Sometimes there’s nothing you can say or do to help someone feel better. In times like that, just make sure you don’t make it worse.


14, 18, 21



Once or twice a year my parents would clean all the walls and baseboards in the house. Every time I smell Murphy’s Oil Soap I think of that. They mostly separated work around traditional gender roles but only insofar as that’s what they liked. Mom had no desire to work in the yard, Dad didn’t like to cook (until he got a bread machine for his retirement!) They often worked together on big tasks no matter inside or outside. Teamwork! And clean walls.


21



Listen to albums. Two of my favorites came out the very same month: Cowboy Carter by Beyoncé and The Tortured Poets Department by Taylor Swift.


12



Give baby a banana before bed and they’ll sleep through the night. (Obviously once they’re on solid food.)


1



Book “8 Candles and a Tree” about celebrating interfaith holidays.


7



Read A Mother’s Reckoning by Sue Klebold (mother of Columbine shooter.)


12



“The only way out is to love yourself. That’s it. That’s all.” - Valerie Bertinelli


10, 13, 17, 21



Sometimes when you win, you lose. And when you lose, you win. Meaning that sometimes when you get what you want it doesn’t work out well. And sometimes wonderful things happen as a result of a failure or disappointment. Chin up. There’s a million paths to happiness and fulfillment. If one doesn’t work out your will find another.


12, 21



You’re going to be okay if your relationship ends. You were a whole person before them and you’ll be a whole person after. - therapy Jeff


15, 21



Here’s one definition of a saint: Someone who isn’t a jerk, doesn’t complain or whine when they’re sick or in pain.


15, 19



“Beer muscles” is when guys gain a sense of indestructibility, an exaggerated sense of their own strength. Fights and aggressive behavior ensues.


15



Take the train to Roanoke.


10



Love isn’t enough but it’s a great start.


21



“But what is grief if not love preserving?” - Unknown


18



People are insecure. Be mindful of fragile egos (we all have them to a degree.) Avoid implying that people aren't doing a good job.


20



There is nothing “basic” about basic human dignity. Never treat a person as though they are put on this earth for your amusement. Everyone deserves to be treated with dignity because we’re all human beings. No matter their age, looks, status, even past wrongdoing, everyone deserves to be treated with dignity.


14



Remember what a teenaged sh*t you were before throwing in the towel on the next generation. We’re all self-centered, entitled and oblivious when we’re young. The goal is that they don’t *stay* that way. Be the parent they need, and they’ll listen. It may take a year or twenty, but they’ll see the light if you just pour love into them.


12-21



I hope you become more of yourself with every passing year. I love you so.


21



Sleep paralysis runs in the family. If you ever feel like you’re awake but you can’t move - don’t panic. It will pass in a minute. It’s just a lag time in your sleep/wake cycle.


20



Don't say anything out loud that you wouldn't want repeated or overheard. Don't email / text, etc. anything that you wouldn't want forwarded.


11-15



1

Everyone gets crushes but if you’re having an imaginary relationship do so with an imaginary person. It’s disrespectful of someone’s dignity to obsess over them. Not to mention your own dignity!


12, 13, 15, 16, 19, 21



Rock those babies to sleep as often as you can.


0, 1, 2



You can forgive someone without speaking to them. Or you can move on without forgiving. Closure isn’t necessary to moving on. The only thing necessary is to move. Move your body, change your perspective, go on a trip, go to a new coffee shop, just move.


16, 19, 21



Follow your dreams…not your boyfriend’s.


16



Seek / Accept job offers that teach you something valuable. Now isn’t the time in your life to worry about the money or status. Get experience! Have fun, learn, grow, challenge yourself and try new things.


15-20