A useful opening line in a conversation (personal, parenting or professional) is “What should I know about ...”. It shows you understand you have something to learn, and it makes people feel valued. “What should I know about what’s going on at football practice?”
Don’t be a mooch!
Contribute: To your home, your relationships, your work, your community, your church, your country, the world.
Think about how much you get from all these things. It’s so much more from all these things than you could ever pay back, but that doesn’t mean you don’t try.
Dig in and contribute wherever you can. Never free-load. That’s not who we are. Be brave and contribute your talent, treasure or whatever you can. Duty and compassion both demand it.
Processing an emotion means you’re not acting on it or avoiding it, you’re just with it. I like to picture it as a person and then imagine having a cup of coffee or a beer with it. Hope this helps you. xoxo
Roll-play confrontational situations so they can practice staying calm, not reacting in situations like road-rage, bullies, being screamed at by a boss or a customer.
Screw “achievement.” Do things you enjoy, share experiences that expand your capacity for joy and compassion. It doesn’t matter if you’re any good, it just matters that you’re in your groove.
Life is for the living. It’s okay to move on. It’s okay to laugh and dream, work, to party, to rest rest, etc. you honor the dead by living your life. Everyone meets up in the end anyway!
Ask him for Christmas present: recite Andy Weir’s “The Egg.” Bonus points for memorization! Also great idea for audition tape. )I’m assuming you’ll be in theater!) xoxo
Never tolerate abuse. But definitely learn how to throw annoying habits and stupid drama in the bucket of the 10% of things you don’t like about being in the relationship. Even the most beautiful stallions poo, everything produces waste. Clean the waste, deal with it as a constant byproduct of life. don’t $@!#% the horse so you don’t have to deal with poo.
Be mindful of avoiding the “race to nowhere.”
No sense in stressing over school and work. We get one life!! LIVE it! Work hard at what you love. There will be seasons of busting your butt, and that’s good. Just make sure it’s in pursuit of something you’re passionate about.
And I hope you take seasons of rest, too. Time to recharge, reflect and decide what’s next for you.
Talk about what patterns of abuse look like. Teach them to recognize red flags like love-bombing, isolating from friends and family, controlling behavior and threats of violence and/or self-harm.
You are always responsible for how you act, no matter what you’re feeling. (Or whether you’re drunk or in any way impaired.)
Hammer this point home for the next 10 years!