When things get scary, look for the helpers. This is true in physical crises and existential ones. SCOTUS just passed down a few truly horrifying rulings, including reversing Roe v Wade. I’m disheartened in all that’s going on, but was reminded to look for the helpers, the activists, etc. Look for them…and join them.
Just fill ‘em with love. Every other parenting mistake or deficit can be fixed, but if a child grows up thinking it’s not loved and doesn’t have a place in this world, that is a recipe for permanent and painful damage. Not necessarily “spoil” them, but cut them slack as often as possible. Just love ‘em up.
You don’t have to keep it together. Let the tears come. Feel the loss. The big feelings never last long, they are a storm you can weather. Then the sky is brighter afterwards. Grief is medicine when expressed, poison when suppressed.
“Racism is real, even if you aren’t a racist. White privilege is real, even if you don’t feel it. Police brutality is real, even if the cop you know is kind. Your world isn’t the world. Everything is not about you.” -Mohamed Safa
So many young adults (and older one too) suffer from a lack of direction, living life without a sense of purpose.
______Here’s my advice: **Do what you love**. ____If you don’t know what that is yet (totally okay) then *go where you’re needed.**___ Make yourself USEFUL doing some sort of work that makes the world (or your family or your community or your country) a better place. Please don’t sit around playing video games or goofing off. That will make you miserable! ___ AND it’s a waste of God’s work (you.) Get busy. _____Stay involved in anything you care about deeply, or that needs you desperately. It will feed your soul and open all kinds of doors.
Beware of those forces that aim to pit good people against each other. Injustices hurt our sensibilities- as they should. So instead of bickering about who’s been wronged worse, let’s join hands and fight injustice on every front. If you get caught up in comparisons, everyone loses.
Ladies, don’t waste a moment of your precious time trying to get a man’s attention. If he’s interested he will love heaven and earth to get YOUR attention. Save your energy for joy and work and learning and doing whatever floats your boat! Let him be the one to twist himself in knots.
Life is for the living. It’s okay to move on. It’s okay to laugh and dream, work, to party, to rest rest, etc. you honor the dead by living your life. Everyone meets up in the end anyway!
Avoid commenting on the number of children someone has (or doesn’t have.) Its none of your business to ask why a couple doesn’t have kids or remark if they announce they’re pregnant with their 7th (other than to say “Congratulations.”)
They can shower themselves if you install a hand-held shower head and install a suction cup wall-mount shower head holder lower on the shower wall. It’s easy to do and very cheap. They love it!
Challenge yourself every day, in one way or another. Mentally (read!) Is there any room for growth in an area you are struggling with? physically (take your pick but never take stupid risks with your safety), emotionally (allow yourself to be vulnerable. Apologize.), spiritually (pray/meditate/ fast.)
If they’re not doing anything dangerous, illegal or immoral, let them be. Give them space and independence. (Just first define dangerous/ illegal/ immoral. Then remind them that you are here and would love to hear about anything they want to share.)
Connect with people however you can, in whatever way feels natural to you: Talk, listen, perform, compete, create, laugh, pray, explore, share your truth, acknowledge the divine in yourself and in everyone you meet.