People always say “Be yourself.” That’s good advice but really what does it mean? I think it’s easier to explain what it DOESN’T mean: When you’re being yourself you’re not pretending to be interested in something or someone you’re not. You’re not doing something just to please someone else (or just to tick them off.) You’re not wearing anything that makes you feel uncomfortable. You’re not pretending to have fun when you’re not having fun. You’re not trying to impress anyone. You’re not trying to fade into the background. You’re not trying to change anything about yourself or someone else. I think that’s a good start. What does “being yourself” mean to you?


11-14, 18, 21



It's a skill to learn how to love people the way they need to be loved. I highly recommend reading the Five Love Languages.


18, 21



Let's find little ways to practice self-control and build that muscle.


11



1

Read Prefontaine.


13



“A lot” is two words. (You wouldn’t write abunch as one word.) “Its” is a pronoun like his or hers (you wouldn’t write her’s) The contraction “it’s” ONLY means “it is.” They’re / there / their


10



Always keep a can of WD-40 in the house.


21



Remember: “C’s get degrees.” Don’t tie yourself in knots over grades.


17, 18



You're about to come into a ton of energy and strength. It will seem like a lot to manage at first, but you'll get used to it and learn to use it constructively. Push your limits (within reason.) Challenge yourself.


13



You don’t have to lower your standards, just lower your walls.


12, 15, 21



Keep a pair of nail clippers in the car - much better lighting outside. Clipping tiny fingernails is terrifying!


Infant-1



1

Dress for energetic alignment. Screw what other people think. Your ability to live a creative, wholehearted life is inversely proportional to how much you care what people think of you. (Care what YOU think of yourself. Express yourself however you can as long as you’re not causing harm or breaking the law. Have fun. Be gentle to yourself.


13, 15, 17, 19, 21



Read “Spare” by Prince Harry.


20



“How we learn to hold what hurts shapes so much of who we are. What we choose to do with our pain defines us more than most things.“ -Chani Nicholas


11, 14, 17



You don’t have to choose to be single forever to enjoy being single for now.


17, 21



Drinking doesn’t work like climbing a hill, it works like surfing waves. “More” is not always better. Once you feel tipsy, drinking more will make you feel *worse*. Remember “more alcohol will ruin my buzz.” Coast, recover, then okay to start again.


14. 15. 17. 18. 21



There are all kinds of parenting and mommy blogs with good resources. A quick Google search will get you started.


Infant



“What do you think about keeping things PG-rated for a while? We’re both just figuring stuff out. The last thing I’d want to do is hurt you.” Or whatever spin you want to put on the idea that there’s no rush, and plenty of amazing sensations to experience and explore, long before things go further than kissing. Hang out in that PG range as long as possible. And if you can’t talk with your partner about that then you probably shouldn’t be having sex anyway.


13, 14, 15, 16, 17



Parent the way you want your children to behave. Compassion, patience. Loving.


1, 2, 3, 4



“It’s not as important how a message is received compared to how it is sent.” Sometimes you have to have uncomfortable conversations but the can always be kind and loving. Sometimes your message won’t land well, but if you expressed yourself truthfully and kindly, that’s not your burden to bear.


16



It's natural to avoid change. Try to learn to accept change, embrace it if you can! Change is good. :)


15



When someone hurts us or REALLY pisses us off... We have to pray for them. It’s hard to stay mad at someone you’re praying for.


8-18



Sponsor a child in a developing country. Write letters, learn about their country and their life.


8



When something is upsetting you...Name it...Take a deep breath...Imagine holding it gently in your hands. (This is a reminder to use this visualization myself and to teach it to you. I want to give you as many tools as I can to help you learn to cope with negative emotions in a healthy way.)


11



1

Give him a copy of The Secret Lives of Great Composers by Elizabeth Lunday.


14



ALWAYS pee before you sit down to nurse a baby.


Infant-1



“Just because you think it doesn’t mean it’s true. Your brain’s a little $@!#% and likes to lie to you.” -Elyse Myers


15, 21



Send thank you acknowledgemnt for gifts received


1-21



1

Gambling is designed to be seductive- Everything about casinos and online gambling sites is about getting you to hand over your cash. It’s a scam. Don’t fall for it!


15, 18



Book “Rainbow Relatives” is a great resource to be able to kindly, accurately and sensitively answer their questions about LGBTQ families.


6



Birthday traditions: 1) Plant something every year. 2) Birthday interview on camera or voice recording.


5