It’s not a project, it’s a practice. (Health, fitness, keeping up with current events, prayer or meditation, housework, reading, etc.)


16



Your very existence is a miracle. Countless cosmic events and generations of ancestors had to come together in precisely the right way at precisely the right time for you to be here now. It’s an honor to be who you are. Act accordingly.


13, 15, 18, 20, 21



“In the middle of the pain you didn’t cause, the change you didn’t want, the reality you didn’t know was coming . . . your life can still be beautiful.” Lysa TerKeurst


20



“Natural” deodorant doesn’t work. Go with trusted brands here. There are times when it’s fine not to look your best, but stinky is never okay.


13, 18



“First the pain. Then the waiting. Then the rising.” Glennon Doyle


16, 21



Grandpa was a Marine, though you’d never know it. Slight in build and oh-so gentle natured. But underneath he had a good bit of grit. He never complained. He once told me “You can stand any amount of pain for a little while.” (Basically saying suck it up and hang in there until help arrives.) I’ve never forgotten it.


18



If you don’t have anything intelligent to say on a subject it’s fine (encouraged) to say nothing. Listen. Learn.


20



Listen to the radio stations they listen to. Know their favorite songs and artists.


12



You are 100% replaceable at work. You are not replaceable at home. A good work ethic is crucial but don’t drain yourself to the point that you don’t have anything left for your family and friends.


21



Book “8 Candles and a Tree” about celebrating interfaith holidays.


7



When someone hurts us or REALLY pisses us off... We have to pray for them. It’s hard to stay mad at someone you’re praying for.


8-18



If it costs you your peace it’s too expensive.


19



You’ve been entrusted with so much. Think about how much of an honor that is, and how big a responsibility.


16, 18, 21



Plan a neighborhood "Winter Olympics" for snow days. Create indoor and outdoor events.


8



The more you move, the happier you are.


10, 11, 13, 15, 18, 21



Begin again. Whether by choice or necessity, sometimes there’s no other option.


15, 21



Thomas Jefferson’s Ten Rules of Conduct. This makes a good exercise for penmanship or for writing “lines” as instructional punishment.


11



Devotion is revealed by behavior, not intention.


15, 17, 21



Purpose is more important than happiness. Having a purpose (or looking for it) will save you. (And sometimes finding a *new* purpose is what you need.)


16, 21



Mallomars in Christmas stockings. Mom NEVER buys Mallomars. But Santa does. (Reticket x 15 years.)


4



You’re gonna want to quit, many times. Whether it’s a job, a marriage, a degree, a cause… whatever. I have no way of knowing whether or not you should quit, just know that feeling like you want to quit is normal when you hit a setback or disappointment, or rejection or betrayal. It doesn’t necessarily mean you’re going to feel that way forever. Sometimes it’s best to cut your losses, sometimes it’s better to stick it out. Treat yourself with patience and compassion while you consider what’s best.


14, 17, 21



Piano


21



When it comes to conflict- what is your part in things?


15, 21



Never give unsolicited advice. Instead ask “How can I best support you?”


14, 20



So what you can. If you’re overwhelmed or depressed, and I can’t get it together to brush your teeth, rinse with water. Tomorrow, rinse with mouthwash. In a few days, brush without bothering to put toothpaste on the brush. This is a pretty extreme example but u get the picture. If you can’t do a load of laundry, just pick up the clothes into a pile. Tomorrow separate the pile. If you can’t face doing a full leg day at the gym, do one rep. Just do what you can, and eventually you will get up to speed. Give yourself grace, my love.


15, 17, 21



Go as a family to local high school musical productions.


9-13



1

Happiness comes from giving and helping, not buying and having.


14, 19



It’s hard to know how to support a friend who is grieving, but it’s a priceless skill / attribute. Some people just are naturally know what to say, but for the rest of us, it can be learned. If you don’t know what to say, just stay silent but be present. Or try something like “I’m so sorry.” Be mindful not to turn away because their pain makes you uncomfortable. Send a text just “thinking of you.” Grief takes a lot of energy and focus, and there’s not much you can (or should) do to help someone process their pain. So lessen their burden by taking some of the stupid everyday life stuff off their plate: Walk the dog, make a meal, make sure there’s food, clean clothes, toilet paper, etc. Help with school or work stuff if possible. Check in often but take your queue from them. Some people want company while others want solitude. Everyone processes pain and grief differently. Don’t force your way on them. Offer to look at pictures or hear stories about the person they lost. This time is about them, so avoid any comparisons with how what they’re going through is similar to something you or someone else went through, unless it was the exact same thing: Telling someone who lost a child that you understand their pain because your grandmother died last year is not okay. People mean well but they say really stupid sh*t sometimes. (If you ever say something that may have caused pain, just acknowledge it, apologize for it, and move on from it.)There are lots of resources. Grief is so isolating. You can’t make their pain go away, but that’s okay. You’re job isn’t to ‘cheer them up’ it’s to ‘keep showing up.’ Read up on current literature, there are tons of great resources.


19



You’re someone’s cup of tea. I don’t mean there is only one person out there for you, I mean someone is waiting to love you exactly how you are. Stop wasting time with fools who want to change you to fit their ideal.


15, 19, 21



You can be angry. But you can’t drive while angry or talk to a child or work, or do anything dangerous when you’re angry.


15, 20