Kids make fun, it’s not nice but they just do. Just blow it off if kids make fun of you got something silly. They’ll drop it if they don’t get a ride out of you. ... But bullying is different. If kids are being mean, threatening or scary, tell me and your teacher.


7



If you sleep with a girl, always call or text the next day. Don't be a d-bag.


18



I want to talk about when NOT to join in. Friends are great and feeling like we belong feels so good. But there are times I hope you muster the courage not to go along: Never cause anyone or anything pain in order to be liked. Don't confuse cruelty for humor. Never participate in things that may cause harm to yourself or others. Can you think of some things you want to make sure you don't go along with?


11



“First things first!” It’s a constant struggle to get out of the house or complete a task. Hammer home “first things first!” After they’re dressed (or whatever task) THEN they can have screen time or playtime free-time, etc.


4



Participate in an exchange program - either through hosting or traveling yourself & immerse yourself in the new culture


17



Sometimes the only thing you can do is to show up. Be there.


13, 15, 17, 21



“Beer muscles” is when guys gain a sense of indestructibility, an exaggerated sense of their own strength. Fights and aggressive behavior ensues.


15



Sometimes it just takes a while to catch on. I had to watch Game of thrones 3 or 4 times before I could keep track of all the characters and subplots. Record your lectures so you can replay them a few times.


13,15,19



“If you want to be beautiful, make beautiful choices.” - (Greek philosopher whose name I can’t remember.)


10, 13, 17, 21



Home is where they love you.


13, 17, 21



I’m going to start you in Mathnasium or some other STEM (math) activity. Not because I want u to score high on your SAT but because I want You to be confident in your math skills you will use it every day and it will come in handy no matter what you choose to do for a living


7



You can love someone and still not tolerate their abuse. Protect your peace and safety.


17, 21



Rent kayaks.


14-16



“People speak of hope as if it is this delicate, ephemeral thing made of whispers and spider's webs. It's not. Hope has dirt on her face, blood on her knuckles, the grit of the cobblestones in her hair, and just spat out a tooth as she rises for another go.” -unknown


17, 19, 21



Let go of things that aren’t good for you. Anger, fear, prejudice, obsession, grudges, snark, etc.


16, 21



You’re getting stronger by the day. Use your strength to protect, never to intimidate. Abusers and bullies are cowards and just the worst of men.


14, 17, 21



“You don’t emerge from $@!#% empty-handed” a friend once told me. Even the worst periods of your life will bring gifts. Be thankful for those gifts, and enjoy them.


19



People learn all sorts of different ways. I found I learn best by repetition (drills) especially true for skills. And by listening for studying. Recording my lectures in college made a huge difference in my ability to learn and retain material. Let’s find what works for you.


14, 17



“A lot” is two words. (You wouldn’t write abunch as one word.) “Its” is a pronoun like his or hers (you wouldn’t write her’s) The contraction “it’s” ONLY means “it is.” They’re / there / their


10



Teach them what to do if they hit an animal while driving on the road. (First find out what you’re supposed to do, THEN teach them.)


16



Share Brene Brown's short video on Empathy vs. Sympathy: Be the bear, not the goat. Fantastic 3 minute video. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Evwgu369Jw&feature=youtu.be


12, 14, 18, 21



Look into summer jobs at national parks.


15, 17



“The Greatest Generation” by Tom Brokaw Listen to audio or read together


14



Reinforce this at every opportunity: “You matter.” Kids respond to this message deeply, whether it comes from a positive source (parents/teacher/coach) or people who are only trying to exploit them.


2-18



Shampoo their hair. Nice luxurious shampoo. It’s a treat. In “5 Love Languages” speak, its an act of service and physical touch.


5, 7, 9, 12



There is so much darkness in the world - keep pushing back against it every way you can. Be a force for good.


14, 16, 21



There are all kinds of ways people end up destroying their lives in an attempt to cope with fear, loneliness, stress, grief, boredom or anxiety, etc. A few: Drug/alcohol addiction, gambling, shopping/ spending addiction, hoarding, sex addiction, fundamentalism/ extremist politics, workaholics, deadbeats. Nobody starts out trying to be an addict or a nut. It happens when you continually choose to avoid dealing with the pain or anxiety you’re feeling. Choices become habits. Habits can form addictions. That’s why it’s SO important to find healthy ways to deal with difficult feelings or situations. What makes you feel better when you’re upset? A shower, a run, music, a game, friends, quiet time, being outdoors ... There are lots of ways to take good care of your spirit. Keep choosing them. Ask for help when you’re not able to make good choices on your own.


14, 17, 19, 21



“God is gentle and loving. He desires you to have a deep sense of safety in His love.” - paraphrasing Henri Nouwen


16



Start a tradition of setting goals for Ne Year. Keep a notebook in with the Christmas ornaments and each year we all add in whatever we want to focus on: such as our resolutions, goals, hope or plans, etc. That will be something fun to do at the end of the year when we’re taking down the tree and putting away all the holiday stuff.


8



Yes, push yourself and see how far / fast / high you can go (physically, academically, etc.) But remember, you have nothing to prove to anyone except yourself.


14, 17, 21