Taken from a friend’s Facebook post: You are holding a cup of coffee when someone comes along and bumps into you or shakes your arm, making you spill your coffee everywhere. Why did you spill the coffee? "Because someone bumped into me!!!" Wrong answer. You spilled the coffee because there was coffee in your cup. Had there been tea in the cup, you would have spilled tea. *Whatever is inside the cup is what will spill out.* Therefore, when life comes along and shakes you (which WILL happen), whatever is inside you will come out. It's easy to fake it, until you get rattled. *So we have to ask ourselves... “what's in my cup?"* When life gets tough, what spills over? Joy, gratefulness, peace and humility? Anger, bitterness, harsh words and reactions? Life provides the cup, YOU choose how to fill it. Today let's work towards filling our cups with gratitude, forgiveness, joy, words of affirmation


12, 17



When disciplining remember: First acknowledge the emotion, then address the behavior.


2-4, 13, 15



1

“I don’t give a rat’s $@!#% how much respect u garner out in the world if you don’t show respect and love and serve those you love at home.” ____loosely quoted from Glennon Doyle’s ‘Untamed.’


14, 19



Most brilliant TED talk I ever saw on living authentically. Step one: decide what you don’t give a f*ck about. Step two: don’t give a f*ck about those things. Always be kind and polite but never be sorry for not giving a $@!#% about stuff you don’t give a $@!#% about.


14, 21



“If you don’t know what hurts me, how can you say you love me?” From a story told by Rabbi Levi Yitzhak ....Do you know what causes him pain or anxiety? What he’s afraid of? In an age-appropriate way....Talk about our fears and the things that hurt us. He will see it’s normal to have fear and pain, and he will learn he can come to me with anything that troubles him.


8



Grit.


14



When you feel like you’re on fire with anger or fear, if you can’t shake it, put that fire to good use.


14



Help him practice having tense conversations without getting a tone of voice.


15



Trust yourself.


20



Make sure they have resources other than us. Hotlines for teens such as Boys Town National Hotline, National $@!#% Prevention Lifeline, etc.


12



An album is like a book, meant to be taken as a whole. It tells a story, has its own vibe. Let’s listen to an album together every week.


12



You’re getting stronger by the day. Use your strength to protect, never to intimidate. Abusers and bullies are cowards and just the worst of men.


14, 17, 21



Research says working with your hands is good for your mind and spirit. Even if it’s just folding laundry or doing yard work. Let’s find a hobby u might like working with your hands.


12



I wish I had heard this in my 20’s. https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMRtFBvGr/


20



Kitchen Commandment: She who cooks the dinner shall not clean up from dinner. I don't want to raise any of you to take housework for granted. It's hard. It's unfair and not cool to expect anyone (parent, spouse, roommate, etc. )to wait on you.


7-18



Sex: There's no single way to do it "right" but there are lots of ways to do it wrong. Not being respectful and tender towards your partner is usually at the root of "wrong" ways to do it. Also, there is no rush. You may think all your friends are "doing it." They're not. Take your time.


16



Institute a “leave by” time instead of a curfew. That way they won’t panic / speed if something out of their control happens to make them late. “Leave Riley’s house by 10pm.”


13



Teach them that when we hear sirens it means someone is in trouble but help is on the way.


2-5



When you know better, do better. No one is born a fully actualized human being! We are all in the process of becoming who we wish to be.


16, 21



A person’s friends are a reflection of their character. Pick friends who you can be yourself around. Look for partners who have close friendships, a circle of friends who think highly of them.


14, 17, 21



The Golden Rule is wrong. At least when it comes to relationships and especially when it comes to parenting. Instead of treating someone how you’d want to be treated, treat them how THEY’D want to be treated.__ Learn what THEY need to feel safe and loved, how THEY express big feelings like fear, anxiety, anger and frustration.___ Instead of assuming the friend/partner/child /coworker wants to be treated how you’d want to be, take the time to learn about them. Then when someone you love is in distress you can respond to them in the way they need. ___(Lesson learned from reading The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman. Great book. A little preachy but push past that. )


1, 13, 19



Just because you love someone doesn’t mean they feel loved by you. Meet the kids where they are.


2, 9, 21



“Never be sorry for not knowing


17, 21



Be a safe place. Teach them to be a safe place too.


12



Don't say anything out loud that you wouldn't want repeated or overheard. Don't email / text, etc. anything that you wouldn't want forwarded.


11-15



1

Re-Read Tim Russert's Big Russ and Me.


14



The thing about behavior is that if you practice you get better. That goes for good behavior and bad behavior. The more you lie, cheat, etc. the better u get. Decide What kind of behavior you want to be good at and then practice practice


7



If you don’t know where to begin, picture where you want it to end, and work it backwards.


15, 21



Japanese multiplication (counting lines.)


8



Build a backyard adventure camp


8