When making decisions or having a disagreement, it’s very easy to get stuck in defense of your position because we just feel so strongly about it. Without realizing it, we can discount good alternatives and or fail to see the strengths of other people’s viewpoints. As an exercise to avoid getting caught in this trap, make a habit of listing 3 reasons why you might be wrong. Stretch to accommodate the possibility that your strongly-held belief just may be wrong.


14, 18, 21



What I most want to teach you this year is that you can always trust me. I will always love you, take care of you and never harm you. You may not always like me, but you can always trust me.


1



Special occasion gift idea: put a video together of a ton of friends and family wishing them the best. Maybe it’s graduation, or wedding or big move, or for when she’s in labor, etc. Ask friends and family to film a short video of encouragement/congratulations/support/advice/etc.


17, 20, 21



“People speak of hope as if it is this delicate, ephemeral thing made of whispers and spider's webs. It's not. Hope has dirt on her face, blood on her knuckles, the grit of the cobblestones in her hair, and just spat out a tooth as she rises for another go.” -unknown


17, 19, 21



Remind them they’re safe to feel whatever they’re feeling.


2, 12, 21



Not all babies are born healthy. There’s grief over that, a painful letting go of hopes and expectations, but eventually parents begin to dream different dreams for their baby. You have it within you to love deeply


21



General rule for health and happiness: avoid excess.


10, 14, 17, 21



You think you’re smart now but just wait. Your brain is just getting warmed up. Feed it: books, travel, music, mushrooms.


14, 17, 21



Never say anything behind someone's back that you wouldn't say to their face.


11, 14, 18



You don’t have to have everything you want. Practice saying “no thank you” to dessert or passing on the purchase you’re considering. Benefits are plentiful: Build self-discipline (which is like a muscle) and you learn you’re really ok and often happier when you don’t indulge a “want.”


13, 15, 21



Always stand up to shake someone’s hand. (NEVER shake a person’s hand while sitting.) Always get up out of your seat to greet a guest and walk them to the door when they leave.


13



Crushes are fine but I beg you not to waste your time and energy obsessing about someone. Really it’s just a way to hide, to feel something without risking anything. F that. Turn your attention to something creative, constructive or productive. Make art, train for a race, volunteer or get a second job. Discover WHAT you love. Pursue that and your people will be there.


15, 17, 20, 21



Be weird. Be happy. Be you. xoxo


12



No one knows what they’re doing. Just be kind and brave and curious. You don’t have to have it figured out.


17



90 seconds or less. No one wants to hear you talk for more than that. (In a personal setting like giving a toast.)


17, 21



Universal Studios


12-18



To avoid miscommunication and misplaced expectations, tell your partner what you need from them. But if what you need is for them to be a different person, that’s not fair to them or to you. Let them go and set about finding the right person.


18, 20



Just remember sometimes you’re there for a good time but not a long time. Not every relationship (job, journey, experience) is meant to be permanent.)


15, 19, 21



Listen to the radio stations they listen to. Know their favorite songs and artists.


12



Choose to love despite the rage. See poem by Lucas Jones “ I Will Teach My Sons to be Dangerous Men.”


12, 14, 16, 19, 21



College: you’re gonna do great! You’re also probably gonna want to quit at some point during your first year. Totally normal. If you decide college isn’t for you or now isn’t the right time, okay. But give it a year if you can. You’ll thank yourself later.


17



Change is scary. But scary doesn’t equal bad. I don’t know what it’s going to look like but I know you will figure it out. You’re going to be okay no matter what curveballs you’re faced with. Stay calm. Be kind and respectful to everyone and every thing, including (especially) yourself. xoxo


5, 10, 15, 20, 21



Consider what you value. Act accordingly.


10, 14, 17, 20



You may end up being a big shot, Good for you! But check yourself. The good lord wasn't above washing his friends' dirty feet so please don't feel like you're above any task that needs to be done. Enjoy your success but stay humble.


20



“Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people.” - Eleanor Roosevelt


13, 19



Never take friendships for granted. Show up. Reach out. Be there when they need you. Friends are gifts; tend to those relationships with love.


15, 20



Encourage others!!!


13



Watch film “Radio” (2003) and talk about being brave. Teach them that doing what’s right takes courage.


8



Are they (we) getting enough quiet?


8, 12-14



Sometimes hookups don’t go well. The vibe is off for whatever reason. Stop. It’s okay to say “actually, let’s just call it a night.” Trust your gut. Be kind but never apologize for saying no-thanks.


15, 20