Remind them they’re safe to feel whatever they’re feeling.


2, 12, 21



My love for you will never run out - neither will God’s love / patience run out. I will always instruct, discipline and give consequences for bad behavior- because it’s my job to teach you. But there’s nothing you could do to lose my love. Remind them daily.


5-20



Misquoting someone here: “It’s not about getting everything you want, it’s about giving everything you have.” Stuff will never satisfy. Pouring yourself into something heart and soul will.


16, 21



“Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people.” - Eleanor Roosevelt


13, 19



Physical contact between two people is only fun / appropriate / legal / healthy if both people are into it. If one party objects, demurs or even acts less-than-interested, that’s the ballgame. Stop physical contact immediately. Be kind and respectful at all times.


15, 18



Curate a presentation on heartbreak. Talk about heartbreaks endured by people we know, fictional characters, historical figures, etc. Point is to normalize it, prepare them for it and teach them that they will come out the other side.


14, 20



Are you proud of the work you did today? Were you respectful and kind? Did you tell the truth and look out for the little ones? If so, I’m happy. I don’t care one bit about grades.


5



Be a good guest. Never arrive to a dinner or a party empty handed. Bring a gift: flowers, food, drink, etc.


18



Reinforce this at every opportunity: “You matter.” Kids respond to this message deeply, whether it comes from a positive source (parents/teacher/coach) or people who are only trying to exploit them.


2-18



When it comes to judging your behavior at school/ sports/ work, ask: Was I fair? Was I kind? Did I put in the work? If the answers are all “Yes,” then rest well. If an answer is “No,” then fix it.


16



It’s so tempting to write someone off, to dismiss them as “less than.” They’re too young or too old to be taken seriously. They speak a different language or have a different skin color. They may be poor, uneducated, disabled or just simply unattractive. RESIST that temptation. Remember that every human being is God’s creation, a masterpiece cloaked in dignity. No matter what they look like or even what they’ve done, everyone you meet is deserving (and in need) of respect. To be humble is to remember this. (Start lesson young, phrased age-appropriately, and reticket yearly. Look for opportunities to discuss.)


8, 10, 11, 12, 16, 21



There IS such a thing as coming on too strong. Err on the side of leaving them wanting more.


15, 18, 21



Sometimes (oftentimes) the truth is easier to find than to face.


14, 20



End of August by Robert Frost is one of my favorite poems.


20



There is an expression “God only gives you what you can handle.” I think that’s backwards. I think that God gives you the grace you need to handle whatever comes your way. He is faithful and generous. I think that’s what “Be not afraid” means.


17



Healing happens when you give up the hope that the past could have been any different. xoxo


20



What do you think about the word “refugee?” Let’s talk about what it means. Personally, I don’t understand all the complexities of immigration policy, but I figure anyone who escapes violence and walks hundreds of miles with kids in tow, trying to get to safety and gain an opportunity for a better life for their family can live next-door to me anytime.


13



“If you want to be beautiful, make beautiful choices.” - (Greek philosopher whose name I can’t remember.)


10, 13, 17, 21



You can get into big trouble (with school and the law) even by fake / joke threats of violence (bomb threat, etc.) No jokes or pranks that have anything to do with violence.


11



You’re not going to be everyone’s cup of tea. What’s something worth being hated for?


11, 14, 17, 21



Buy life insurance when you're young.


21



Respect people’s privacy. No snooping, eavesdropping, peeping, etc.


11



“Pick a problem - any problem,and do something about it. Because to somebody who is hurting, ‘something’ is everything.” -Oprah Winfrey


12-16



Spend 20 minutes a day watching a show you like in Spanish (or whatever your target language is) with reactionary subtitles. You’ll pick it up in no time!


13, 16, 19



Difficult conversations are…difficult. If you have to deliver bad news, don’t beat around the bush but prepare them for what’s coming rather than just blurting it out. “I have some news that’s going to be difficult to hear…” Or “Is this a good time to talk?” Those are just a couple examples, but many more are available. Look it up or ask people who routinely have to give bad news.


20



Listen to albums. Two of my favorites came out the very same month: Cowboy Carter by Beyoncé and The Tortured Poets Department by Taylor Swift.


12



Two words: Kinetic Sand.


3



Sometimes the job will require you to do menial tasks. Do them enthusiastically because nothing is “beneath you.” If the good Lord can wash people’s feet, you can make coffee at the office. Get over yourself.


16, 21



In marriage there will be times or occasions when one of you will be “pilot” and the other “copilot” (depending on skills, abilities, circumstances, etc.) Both pilot and copilot are good! But never be a “passenger” in a relationship.


21



“The more you sweat, the less you bleed.” True in boxing and in life. Put the work in. No shortcuts.


14, 18, 21