Check in on your friends. Even the ones that seem fine.


14-21



1

Always have a 5 year plan. Be thinking of goals you want to work towards, however big or small. What inspires you? What drives you? What do you want to accomplish or cure or solve?


15, 17, 21



Inevitably you will make mistakes in your career. Someone will dress you down for it. It stings. But they are doing you a favor. Thank them for it. We all have to learn, and we can’t do that if our pride gets in the way. Be humble and accept constructive criticism.


16, 21



Practice not putting stuff off. If it takes 10 seconds or less do it now. Then move up to 30 seconds or less. Keep going up to ~3 minutes. Good example is putting away laundry or emptying dishwasher, etc.


15



For parties, collect cell phones and put them in a basket. "Parent calls only. Enjoy the people here! They're pretty awesome!"


12



I hope you become more of yourself with every passing year. I love you so.


21



Before speaking (or texting) ask yourself three questions: Is it kind? Is it true? Is it necessary? If not all three, don’t speak. (PS “kind” isn’t the same as good news. You can deliver bad news with kindness.)


11, 14, 20



I want you to remember that for the first three years of your life I couldn’t take a poop without you on my lap. So there will be no shirking hugs from Mom now that you’re a teenager. xoxo


14



Let's talk about what armor you choose. People use all kinds of props and attitudes to try to protect or soothe themselves. Often it's that armor that ends up being much worse than the scary problems they were trying to avoid in the first place. Developing a healthy set of armor is crucial. Let's talk about some healthy ways to make ourselves feel better. Reference Brene Brown wholeheartedness.


12-16



It's very important to me, the idea of the scale of good and bad, of beauty and suffering. I think we should do everything we can to increase the beauty and to take away from the suffering. We have to work hard to tip the scale in the direction of good.


1Infant-14



A simple blessing to silently pray over someone: “May he (she) be healthy, May he be safe. O Lord bless him with peace and joy.” Pray for people you know, for strangers on the elevator, for teachers, world leaders, friends or foes, etc. It’s one way to make the world a better place, and it turns your heart closer to God.


15



“I beseech you, in the bowels of Christ, think it possible that you may be mistaken.” - Oliver Cromwell ……. Great example of this is the story of Dr. Anthony Fauci with regard to his HIV/$@!#% research and corresponding dealings with the gay community. They started out adversarial but Fauci wasn’t above hearing their concerns and working together. Life-saving drugs got approved as a result. Dr. Fauci is one of my heroes. Huge brain, big heart and tiny ego.


15



Let's find little ways to practice self-control and build that muscle.


11



Spend 20 minutes a day watching a show you like in Spanish (or whatever your target language is) with reactionary subtitles. You’ll pick it up in no time!


13, 16, 19



Sometimes you have to put aside how you feel about a person and objectively look at how their actions show how they feel about *you.*


16



If someone doesn’t want your attention or warrant your attention, don’t give it.


15



Men worry about getting laughed at or rejected by a woman. Women worry about getting killed when they reject a man. Let that sink in.


15, 21



Make a separate piggie bank together for money to donate. Talk about how we manage what we have thoughtfully: Save some, spend some, donate some.


5-8



Look into language school. Now is a good time to start learning Chinese, Spanish or Arabic.


5-8



Talk about how to act respectfully and be inclusive of children with disabilities and facial deformities, etc.


5-10



Never trust your tongue when your heart is bitter. Hush until you heal.


12, 18



Don’t let someone have to tell you twice that they don’t want you. Nothing good comes from hanging on after that.


15, 21



Enrich your mind. Refresh your body. Renew your spirit. - Andrew Weil, MD.


13, 16, 19, 21



When things get scary, look for the helpers. This is true in physical crises and existential ones. SCOTUS just passed down a few truly horrifying rulings, including reversing Roe v Wade. I’m disheartened in all that’s going on, but was reminded to look for the helpers, the activists, etc. Look for them…and join them.


10, 15, 21



When trying to make a u-turn with a tight turning radius, go VERY slow. .You’ll be more likely to make it and if you don’t make it you won’t cause damage.)


16



“You don’t get what you deserve. You get what you negotiate.” - name escapes me


15, 19, 21



Practice “doing without” (or “going without.”). Even young kids can learn the concept. Nobody get everything they want. Sometimes it’s harder than others, but it’s not the end of the world when we have to do without something we want.


4-11



Turn on the closed captions on tv. Reading them is almost unconscious. Even better, set the audio to a language other than English and turn on English captions.


4-9



Build something beautiful.


13, 21