“Open your eyes and see what you can, until they close forever.” - All the Light We Cannot See by Anthony Dorr. See the world! Learn science, appreciate art and books, meet people and be genuinely interested in them. Engage in the fight for justice, resist fascism and dictators. Share what you have and who you are. Putting up walls is a waste of time. Yes, there will be pain. But you will be able to face it with grace, grit, courage and with the love of others. Make love! But remember if they’re too drunk to drive, they’re too drunk to consent. And be sure you’re both on the same page so you can avoid misunderstandings and hurt feelings (yours and theirs). Don’t kiss and tell. Be protective but never possessive. Just be a man, you know? (man/woman/grownup human.) Be safe - $@!#% is forever.


15, 16, 17, 18, 21



Zootopia is a good movie to illustrate what a bully is and how we should stand up to them when they are hurting or taunting other kids.


5-8



Never post a pic to social media that you wouldn't want Grandma to see. NEVER send or ask to receive naked pictures. It's tacky, gross, illegal and not worth it. Even if "everyone does it". It's rude and disrespectful.


11-13, 18



Think about God as the driver of our car or the pilot of a plane- He gets us through the storm, he shows us and encourages us to enjoy the beauty of the scenery. But all the while He keeps us with him. He doesn’t cause the storms, He gets us through them. We can trust in his goodness and wisdom even when the conditions are really scary.


5, 12



Appreciate other cultures when traveling or interacting among people from different cultures. Once on a mission trip, the locals brought coffee and cookies by in the afternoons, but I never took any. I regret that lost opportunity for connection.


14, 18, 21



The whole point of Pride is a recognition and celebration of the fact that you don’t have to be anything other than your truest nature (as defined by you!) No matter gay, straight, bi, trans, etc. Be proud of who you are.) xo


10, 14, 18, 21



Someone I admire is __________. Talk about someone you admire and why. Ask them to do the same. Do this often as you can. Reticket through age 18.


4



“Never be sorry for not knowing


17, 21



Go as a family to local high school musical productions.


9-13



1

Drunken shenanigans are part of life when you’re in college, etc. but it gets old fast. That kind of behavior as an adult is just sad. Drink responsibly. Don’t make an $@!#% out of yourself. I recommend this rule: Don’t have more than one drink at a work function.


21



Read J.R.R. Tolkien's The Hobbit together


11



Staying calm while under pressure or when you could scream in frustration - that is most of the battle. Sometimes the fact that you stayed calm qualifies as a win.


16, 21



C.S. Lewis books. (Children’s and adult.)


12, 21



Sometimes progress is slow - Keep working. Sometimes change is swift - hang on!


16



Gambling is designed to be seductive- Everything about casinos and online gambling sites is about getting you to hand over your cash. It’s a scam. Don’t fall for it!


15, 18



Practice sitting still and quiet. Make it a game. Helps with focus and impulsivity.


4-7



You were THREE years old when you caught sight of a half-dressed beautiful woman. You didn’t have much of a vocabulary yet but when your eyes got wide and you said “BAM BAM” I knew exactly what you meant. (Woman was Jessica Biel in an Adam Sandler movie.)


14, 21



Ask”How can I be a better parent to you?” Listen.


1Infant-18



Treat your subordinates as if you’ll be working for them someday.


21



Inevitably you will make mistakes in your career. Someone will dress you down for it. It stings. But they are doing you a favor. Thank them for it. We all have to learn, and we can’t do that if our pride gets in the way. Be humble and accept constructive criticism.


16, 21



Teach tuck to drive


15



Compete for the last meatball at Sunday dinner: Biggest burp, telling the best story, finished vegetables first, etc.


5



On a job interview, mention a high-level educational goal such as MBA or law school. Their estimation of you will go up without them even realizing it. Your offer will be higher. Also follow, up with a brief but we’ll-written (professional) thank you note/email whatever.


17, 19, 21



Watch the documentary Kelce (2023)


12



Be the kind of man that people feel safe around. Safe from harm, safe from judgment and safe from ridicule.


17



Kids who are a little different (maybe they make funny sounds, look different, or aren’t able to talk or walk very well, etc.) Remember that just because they might be different, they are never “less than.” Their feelings matter as much as yours. They like to play as much as you. Their families love them as much as your family loves you. Include them as much as you can. You could end up making a great friend!


6



Let's find little ways to practice self-control and build that muscle.


11



1

Marry for character, not just chemistry.


17, 21



When you feel hopeless that’s when you know it’s time to seek help. It’s a red flag in someone’s demeanor. Notify parents if you notice this feeling of deep despair in yourself or someone you know. Help really does help.


13, 15, 17, 19, 21



Just love them. With all your might, them for who they are, and where they are. Forget about the other stuff.


15