When you begin dating it’s all butterflies and moonbeams. Eventually you’re going to do or say something that hurts the other person and vice versa. For that matter, eventually you’ll disagree about something. It’s VERY important to consider how they handle it. Nobody is perfect, it may not be pretty but it had better be civil. If not, don’t think for a second that they will change. Get outta there.


15, 21



Eat at a local restaurant tonight. Get the cream sauce. Have a cold pint at 4 o’clock in a mostly empty bar. Go somewhere you’ve never been. Listen to someone you think may have nothing in common with you. Order the steak rare. Eat an oyster. Have a Negroni. Have two. Be open to a world where you may not understand or agree with the person next to you, but have a drink with them anyways. Eat slowly. Tip your server. Check in on your friends. Check in on yourself. Enjoy the ride." - Anthony Bourdain


18, 21



Keep screen time to a minimum.


2-8



Start a vegetable garden.


7



Ditch the serving bowls, plates, tablecloth and utensils. Cover middle of table in tinfoil for the food. Give each kid a tinfoil placemat in lieu of a plate. Let them eat with their fingers. (Works great with spaghetti, chicken, ribs, shrimp, etc. Try it with ice-cream and cake for a birthday party!


3-6



Sometimes we’re just not ready to appreciate or understand a book or film or piece of art. Revisit them as you age.


19, 21



Check out Harmonia School on Mill St Music Art Theatre


6



It’s hard to want something and not have it. Kids have to learn how to sit with that.


3-17



Read “Raising a Screen Smart Kid” by Julianna Miner before you consider giving him a phone.


10



Replace “but” with “and.” “I love you but...” Becomes “I love you and that’s why...” etc.


9



Be mindful of privilege. Discuss the concept, point it out where you see it.


11-18



When choosing a partner I think it's less important that you both "believe" the same things and more important that you VALUE the same things and share the same priorities.


20



Read blog post from Parent's Corner: The Letter Your Teenager Can't Write You By Gretchen Schmelzer June 23, 2015


13-17



“When it comes to consequences, don’t speak what you won’t serve.” Meaning don’t threaten any punishment you’re not willing to enforce. This is helpful in terms of teaching the child a lesson and also an important lesson in not shooting yourself in the foot. (I took away your tv one day you were home on a snow day. Bad idea. That punishment was against my own interest! I got no work done.


2



Explore the magic of Deer Valley YMCA Camp


07-13



White privilege doesn’t mean that your life hasn’t been hard, it means that your skin color isn’t one of the things making it harder.


14



“Enthusiasm is the answer to everything.” - Rodrigo’s father


15, 21



When I say I want you to be happy I’m not talking about pleasure and ease. I mean purpose and pride you in yourself, meaningful work, and a solid group of friends and family who loves you for who you are, so you don’t ever have to pretend to be something you’re not.


21



Be willing to say “I don’t know” if you don’t know! Don’t just make stuff up.


15, 20



Don’t use a bad word when you can use a good word.


10



Relationships can end beautifully and bravely. They’re not all going to be forever. It’s much better to grieve the end of a relationship than to endure an unhealthy one.


15, 19, 21



The Golden Rule is wrong. At least when it comes to relationships and especially when it comes to parenting. Instead of treating someone how you’d want to be treated, treat them how THEY’D want to be treated.__ Learn what THEY need to feel safe and loved, how THEY express big feelings like fear, anxiety, anger and frustration.___ Instead of assuming the friend/partner/child /coworker wants to be treated how you’d want to be, take the time to learn about them. Then when someone you love is in distress you can respond to them in the way they need. ___(Lesson learned from reading The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman. Great book. A little preachy but push past that. )


1, 13, 19



Teach car maintenance: Adding air to tires, checking oil, etc.


13-17



Shirts and pants don't go into the laundry inside-out. From now on, they will be responsible for turning their laundry right-side-out. Will help instill that laundry is not done by the laundry fairy.


4



Jumper cables 101


14



Bring Christmas cookies to local fire station and police station. (Annually)


6



1

Be extra careful when you’re parking or pulling out of a driveway. It’s hard to see little kids or pets.


16



There’s an art to speaking harsh truths in a delicate way. There’s an art in describing a ridiculous person or thing without being insulting. Mark Twain was a master at it. Read up!


17, 21



Best take on parenting: “My kid is never gonna not feel safe with me.”


1, 5, 10, 15