I stopped worrying about you by the time you were seven. (I’m not talking about your safety and health, that I’ll always worry about!) But I knew you were a joyful, generous, kind, smart and well-mannered person. You were a great friend, supportive and fun. You would be a good partner, and would contribute so much good to society. I could see you had a curious mind, an active imagination and more than a healthy dose of courage.
Change always brings feelings of unease. It’s easy to confuse that feeling of unease with the feeling that something must be wrong. Give yourself time to adjust before deciding if a new thing is bad..
Plastic stackable dresser - 5 drawers labeled for days of the week. Put outfits in each. No drama emergencies on school days, the week’s wardrobe is planned out.
You can’t grow in faith (or character or friendships) without learning to be humble. To forgive. To listen without agenda. To allow for the possibility you may be in the wrong.
Ask for help. God will give it.
“Where you stand depends on where you sit.” It means your personal situation informs your stance on issues. Try to imagine how you’d vote if you were sitting at a less privileged place.
I want to talk about when NOT to join in. Friends are great and feeling like we belong feels so good. But there are times I hope you muster the courage not to go along: Never cause anyone or anything pain in order to be liked. Don't confuse cruelty for humor. Never participate in things that may cause harm to yourself or others.
Can you think of some things you want to make sure you don't go along with?
You may end up being a big shot, Good for you! But check yourself. The good lord wasn't above washing his friends' dirty feet so please don't feel like you're above any task that needs to be done. Enjoy your success but stay humble.
I wrestle with leaving the church but I want to save you a lifetime of feelings of unworthiness. It’s totally normal to feel like you’re not good enough. We all battle those kinds of insecurities, so the last thing we need is to be taught that God thinks it too. Know that in reality we are all precious, down to the subatomic level. So when you think you’re unworthy, shake it off! You belong in every room you enter.
Sometimes fear feels like a signal to get out of there, but being uncomfortable in a new situation is totally normal. Practice sitting in that discomfort and you’ll find it gets easier.
Resource: the website Ask, Listen and Learn has great material about how to start a conversation about the dangers of under-age drinking. asklistenlearn.org
Go easy on the cologne, perfume, scented lotions, etc. People shouldn't be able to smell your perfume a mile away, only up close. Also, it's generally not appropriate for work.
When someone introduces themselves as transgender, it’s no big deal. Simply say “nice to meet you” or “cool.” Then politely ask “What are your pronouns?” And then you know how they prefer to be addressed.