Work on developing a “no shortcuts” mode. Looking for a faster/easier/bare-minimum option isn’t always bad. People get paid a lot of money for creating efficacy. But there are times when that approach is wrong. Anything you want to grow from (relationships, school, work, wealth, health, knowledge, etc.) those things deserve your full effort, focus and dedication. Play. Definitely play! But don’t f*ck around.


12, 14, 15, 18, 19, 21



Give yourself a break from thinking about yourself.


13, 16, 21



There’s a difference between looking cool and being cool. A person who wants to look cool is trying to impress other people. A person who is actually cool is true to himself /herself. Dress how it makes YOU happy! And fun fact, it’s those people who are the most well-liked because they sort of give others permission to be themselves…and everyone wants to be seen and liked for who they really are. So if you want to be popular remember three things: Be kind. Be yourself. Don’t judge


12,15



Teach car maintenance: Adding air to tires, checking oil, etc.


13-17



When someone introduces themselves as transgender, it’s no big deal. Simply say “nice to meet you” or “cool.” Then politely ask “What are your pronouns?” And then you know how they prefer to be addressed.


13



Never tolerate abuse. But definitely learn how to throw annoying habits and stupid drama in the bucket of the 10% of things you don’t like about being in the relationship. Even the most beautiful stallions poo, everything produces waste. Clean the waste, deal with it as a constant byproduct of life. don’t $@!#% the horse so you don’t have to deal with poo.


17, 21



Talking to people you disagree with is sometimes difficult. But it doesn’t have to be. Enter every conversion assuming you have something to learn.


14, 18, 21



You tackled a big project and you're wondering if it will be a success. Ask yourself: "Was I fair?" Was I kind?" " Did I put in the work?" If the answer is yes, then rest well, no matter what the outcome. If the answer is no, go back and fix it.


17



Drinking doesn’t work like climbing a hill, it works like surfing waves. “More” is not always better. Once you feel tipsy, drinking more will make you feel *worse*. Remember “more alcohol will ruin my buzz.” Coast, recover, then okay to start again.


14. 15. 17. 18. 21



Consensual sex requires no persuasion, convincing or begging.


14, 17



Do feel like you’re where you’re supposed to be?


19, 21



“ A vocation is where our anger and our joy meet.” -Sarah Bessey


16



Let’s talk about hungry kids. What can we do to help? Donate? Volunteer? Start a Little Free Pantry?


9



1

Getting dumped from a bad relationship or fired from a job that’s killing you is kind of like pooping your pants: Horrifying...but also a little bit of relief. Keep your perspective and you’ll be fine. xoxo.


20



You may end up being a big shot, Good for you! But check yourself. The good lord wasn't above washing his friends' dirty feet so please don't feel like you're above any task that needs to be done. Enjoy your success but stay humble.


20



Someone I admire is __________. Talk about someone you admire and why. Ask them to do the same. Do this often as you can. Reticket through age 18.


4



To my boys: Personally I believe the boy / man should pay when out on a date. Always be prepared to pay - but sometimes a girl / woman wants to pay or split the check. Don’t push back on that. Make sure she knows it would be your pleasure to pay because you want to show her a good time and spoil her, but that you understand that paying a check doesn’t put her in your debt. Instead, your motto should be “If you’re comfortable, I’m comfortable.” And that goes for a lot of categories including sex/ physical contact. And to my girls: Always be prepared to pay, offer to pay often. It’s a sad fact that some men feel they’re owed something if they spring for dinner. On a date you are never obligated to do or say anything you don’t want to. Never.


16, 21



Monty Python movies.


12-15



So you want to be a writer- then write. Anything. Play around with it. Journal. Fiction, non-fiction, biography, obits, blogs, plays, tv pilots, whatever. You will probably suck at it. Keep writing. Write more and more. You will get better, you’ll find your flow. This w


16, 21



We do what we do and feel how we feel because we think what we think. Our thoughts are so powerful. Let’s take each one captive today and be sure they’re the kind of thoughts we want guiding and influencing the way we live our lives.” -Lysa TerKeurst


14



I did my best to guide you, but I’m sure there are many areas where my take is just not aligned with yours. That’s okay! Bunny please don’t feel any obligation to believe what I believe or take any advice, or continue any tradition mentioned in this Coda.


21



“First things first!” It’s a constant struggle to get out of the house or complete a task. Hammer home “first things first!” After they’re dressed (or whatever task) THEN they can have screen time or playtime free-time, etc.


4



No absolute restrictions on food but stress that some foods are “party food.” Chips, for example. (I love potato chips!)


4



“Your soul is more magnificent, beautiful, and gigantic than you can possibly imagine.” From short story “The Egg” by Andy Weir


1Infant-21



“People are in your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. Pain comes when we try to put them in the wrong category.” - random therapist I never met.


16



When you’re at home in your own skin you invite people to be at home in theirs too.


14, 20



Just let a sweet moment be. There’s a time for jokes or small talk, but sometimes silence is best.


15,21



Read Thanks for the Feedback by Heen and Stone. Crucial for ADHD and rejection sensitivity. Wish I had it when I was about to launch into my career!


15, 19, 21



Overflowing toilet 101: Teach how to turn off the water valve and how to plunge. From now on, you break it, you fix it.


11



Sometimes grief looks a lot like anger. Are you upset about something you lost or had to let go of?


15, 21