People always say “Be yourself.” That’s good advice but really what does it mean? I think it’s easier to explain what it DOESN’T mean: When you’re being yourself you’re not pretending to be interested in something or someone you’re not. You’re not doing something just to please someone else (or just to tick them off.) You’re not wearing anything that makes you feel uncomfortable. You’re not pretending to have fun when you’re not having fun. You’re not trying to impress anyone. You’re not trying to fade into the background. You’re not trying to change anything about yourself or someone else. I think that’s a good start. What does “being yourself” mean to you?


11-14, 18, 21



Drunken shenanigans are part of life when you’re in college, etc. but it gets old fast. That kind of behavior as an adult is just sad. Drink responsibly. Don’t make an $@!#% out of yourself. I recommend this rule: Don’t have more than one drink at a work function.


21



Sometimes (oftentimes) the truth is easier to find than to face.


14, 20



There’s a difference between looking cool and being cool. A person who wants to look cool is trying to impress other people. A person who is actually cool is true to himself /herself. Dress how it makes YOU happy! And fun fact, it’s those people who are the most well-liked because they sort of give others permission to be themselves…and everyone wants to be seen and liked for who they really are. So if you want to be popular remember three things: Be kind. Be yourself. Don’t judge


12,15



Teach them what to do if they hit an animal while driving on the road. (First find out what you’re supposed to do, THEN teach them.)


16



Change is scary. But scary doesn’t equal bad. I don’t know what it’s going to look like but I know you will figure it out. You’re going to be okay no matter what curveballs you’re faced with. Stay calm. Be kind and respectful to everyone and every thing, including (especially) yourself. xoxo


5, 10, 15, 20, 21



None of us should ever have to apologize for being who we are.


10, 14, 21



Staying calm is 90% of the battle. Practice.


13, 15, 18, 21



Purpose is more important than happiness. Having a purpose (or looking for it) will save you. (And sometimes finding a *new* purpose is what you need.)


16, 21



I would rather deal with a big truth than a little lie. Whatever it is you’re going through we can solve it together but only if we’re both honest.


14



You never know what people are going through. Depression, PTSD, anxiety could look like avoidance, anger, risk-taking, promiscuity, etc. Look out for friends, coworkers and loved ones who may be in pain. You don’t need to solve their problem, just allow for the possibility that they’re going through something. Try to give them the benefit of the doubt and not write off “bad” behavior as a character flaw. Offer a non-judgmental ear.


15, 20



When dropping them off at a dorm, leave them with. Cookie sheet and cookie dough. Make cookies/make friends.


15, 17, 18, 19, 21



There will be some losses or changes that completely shake you to the core. But remember that some bad experiences are like pooping your pants - Totally horrible but also kind of a relief.


19



Be generous in all things. That is my hope for you.


14, 18, 21



1

Be intentional. You don’t get to choose what they remember.


1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10



Talking to people you disagree with is sometimes difficult. But it doesn’t have to be. Enter every conversion assuming you have something to learn.


14, 18, 21



Let’s find an activity where you can work with your hands


11



Read "You Can’t buy a Dinosaur with a Dime" by Harriet Ziefert. Teaches kids about earning money through work, making choices, even paying taxes!


9



Keep porn to a minimum. Never at school or work. It's normal to be curious but it's really not a healthy representation of sex. Porn is a business. It's designed to get you off, not to be realistic or educational. That's not the way sex looks or how you're expected to behave. Try O.school instead.


15



Worst thing in the world is spending your life with the wrong person.


21



Staying calm while under pressure or when you could scream in frustration - that is most of the battle. Sometimes the fact that you stayed calm qualifies as a win.


16, 21



“Life is good when you are happy, but much better when others are happy because of you.” -Pope Francis Endeavor to make people happy by the work you do, by the way you treat them, by your contributions to the world. But don’t ever try to make someone happy by changing yourself.


13, 17



Life doesn’t need to be perfect to be beautiful.


20



If you’re waiting on someone to change for the relationship to work, it’s not gonna work. Love ‘em or leave ‘em. But forget trying to change them. (Same works in reverse. If someone wants you to change something about yourself before they commit, don’t walk away…RUN!)


14, 18, 21



Sad but important fact: You’ll never be enough for some people. Never. -Chasten Buttigieg


18



Sometimes hookups don’t go well. The vibe is off for whatever reason. Stop. It’s okay to say “actually, let’s just call it a night.” Trust your gut. Be kind but never apologize for saying no-thanks.


15, 20



Read J.R.R. Tolkien's The Hobbit together


11



Begin planning trip for 10th bday. Maybe to Atlantis in Bahamas or someplace he’d be excited about._____Get him involved in planning and saving.


8



“Forget about sex. Just play first.” Forget about making a move and just have fun. Dance, listen to music together, go somewhere exciting, look at something beautiful, read to each other, play sports, let yourself be seen and encourage them to do the same. Communicate in a hundred ways: talk/send texts/ post on social media, pass notes, whatever. Sex isn’t the door to intimacy, feeling safe to be yourself around your partner is.


15-20