There's an old saying that goes something like "Don't focus on how big your problems are, focus instead on how big your God is." On a certain level, that's way too simple, even trite. But without discounting the real pain you might be experiencing in a moment of crisis, I encourage you to embrace that sentiment. You can't forget about the problem, but you can change your focus, and decide to cling to the goodness of the Lord.


15



“Whenever you think that some situation or some person is ruining your life, it’s actually you who are ruining your life. It’s such a simple idea. Feeling like a victim is a perfectly disastrous way to make go through life.” — Charlie Munger


13, 15, 19, 21



“First the pain. Then the waiting. Then the rising.” Glennon Doyle


16, 21



Compete for the last meatball at Sunday dinner: Biggest burp, telling the best story, finished vegetables first, etc.


5



Drunken shenanigans are part of life when you’re in college, etc. but it gets old fast. That kind of behavior as an adult is just sad. Drink responsibly. Don’t make an $@!#% out of yourself. I recommend this rule: Don’t have more than one drink at a work function.


21



Just because I forgive you, it doesn’t mean I trust you. Trust has to be earned.


15, 18, 21



Forget perfection. Nothing is perfect. No relationship, job, house, or day is perfect. Let go of expectations, be open to the mess.


18



You remember experiences, connections. Not stuff. Don’t get too caught up in stuff.


12, 15, 17, 21



Bottom line bible quote: Psalm 37:3 “Trust in the LORD and do good.” That pretty much covers everything.


13, 21



No matter how smart you are or how much you know, you still don’t know everything. ALWAYS be willing to learn and to change your position when faced with new information or perspective.


15, 20



You should feel safe with friends. They shouldn’t try to get you hurt or in trouble. Anyone who makes you feel unsafe is not your friend.


8-15



You don’t have to go to college, but whether you do or not, I implore you to read. If you’re like me a slow reader, pace yourself but keep at it. Read bestsellers and classics. Fiction, biography, history, art, every damn thing. A big regret of my life is that I never tried to love reading as a kid. Do yourself a favor and carve out time to read every day. Even if’s it’s just a few pages. Your mind will sharpen and your heart will be full and your soul will be fed.


10, 12, 14, 15, 16, 21



Isometrics for “punishment” (wall sits, arm lifts, planks, etc.)


5



“If you can’t figure something out, figure out how to figure it out.” - Paul Graham


18



Play up your strengths. What are your strengths? What are you really good at or love doing?


13, 17, 21



Plastic stackable dresser - 5 drawers labeled for days of the week. Put outfits in each. No drama emergencies on school days, the week’s wardrobe is planned out.


5



Tell them who they are: kind, creative, smart etc. A person of honor and integrity, a part of the divine universe. Demonstrate for them what it means to live according to your values. Encourage them to listen to their body, guide them on how they might best find (and align with) their truest nature. Listen to them when they’re exploring what that might look like. Support them when they decide.


1, 2, 5, 7, 12, 16, 18, 21



Being a professional means taking your work seriously not necessarily taking yourself seriously but take the job seriously, you’re there to do a job your income and the income of those around you depend on it is not a joke. It is not something to be played with you made a commitment, honor it. Show up, prepared and ready to work. Be there on time dressed well alert and positive..


16, 17, 21



Ask him to memorize and recite William Ernest Henley poem “Invictus” as a Christmas present for me.


15



Your emotional energy is sacred, and there’s nothing wrong with treating it that way. If connection is what you’re looking for, save your emotional energy for those who will cherish it and share their own. - Yung Pueblo from his book “Lighter”


12, 14, 17, 21



“You’ll never be alone when you carry a poet in your pocket.” - John Adams Bring a book with you wherever you go.


12, 19



Just love ‘em up. Be patient and kind. Be present. Listen. Play. Take care of their needs. Each one will be different and need you in different ways. That’s all, just fill them with love and security and they’ll grow up beautifully.


1-18



Re-Read "Girls and Sex: Navigating the New Landscape" by Peggy Orenstein.


13



Failed? Lift yourself up, or live there. You know the work you need to do, be it physical, mental, emotional or spiritual, etc. So do it. Do the work. The only bitterness in failure comes from not having the guts to get back up again.


12, 16, 18, 20, 21



Grandpa used to keep a hundred dollar bill stashed discreetly in his wallet “for emergencies.”


17



“Natural” deodorant doesn’t work. Go with trusted brands here. There are times when it’s fine not to look your best, but stinky is never okay.


13, 18



Watch movie Sky Walk (2019) it’s about a school paper.


14, 18



No threats, not even jokingly.


15



Sometimes I think the best way to take care of them is to teach them to take care of others: Littler kids, sick or disabled, those who’ve been left out.


5-7, 1Infant-12



Don’t offer them advice until you ask questions: What does a good outcome here look like for you? How much energy are you willing to put into this? Do you feel like you’re being asked to sacrifice a part of who you are if you do this? Is the fear you’re feeling maybe just that initial reaction we all get when something is new and unfamiliar? Stuff like that. Mostly they just need help understanding themselves and encouragement to stay true to themselves.


4, 7, 12, 15, 18, 21