“I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it.” - Maya Angelou


12, 15, 21



Appreciate other cultures when traveling or interacting among people from different cultures. Once on a mission trip, the locals brought coffee and cookies by in the afternoons, but I never took any. I regret that lost opportunity for connection.


14, 18, 21



So you want to be a writer- then write. Anything. Play around with it. Journal. Fiction, non-fiction, biography, obits, blogs, plays, tv pilots, whatever. You will probably suck at it. Keep writing. Write more and more. You will get better, you’ll find your flow. This w


16, 21



To my boys: Personally I believe the boy / man should pay when out on a date. Always be prepared to pay - but sometimes a girl / woman wants to pay or split the check. Don’t push back on that. Make sure she knows it would be your pleasure to pay because you want to show her a good time and spoil her, but that you understand that paying a check doesn’t put her in your debt. Instead, your motto should be “If you’re comfortable, I’m comfortable.” And that goes for a lot of categories including sex/ physical contact. And to my girls: Always be prepared to pay, offer to pay often. It’s a sad fact that some men feel they’re owed something if they spring for dinner. On a date you are never obligated to do or say anything you don’t want to. Never.


16, 21



Colin Powell’s 13 rules: 1. It ain't as bad as you think. It will look better in the morning. 2. Get mad, then get over it. 3. Avoid having your ego so close to your position that when your position falls, your ego goes with it. 4. It can be done. 5. Be careful what you choose. You may get it. 6. Don't let adverse facts stand in the way of a good decision. 7. You can't make someone else's choices. You shouldn't let someone else make yours. 8. Check small things. 9. Share credit. 10. Remain calm. Be kind. 11. Have a vision. Be demanding. 12. Don't take counsel of your fears or naysayers. 13. Perpetual optimism is a force multiplier.


11, 14, 18



I forget who said it but I love it: “I don’t know what I think until I write it down.” Paper and pen. Write. Keep it or burn it whatever you like. Journal or make a list or bullet points or narrative…whatever. Just write.


15, 21



Watch the local news together.


12



Help him practice having tense conversations without getting a tone of voice.


15



If it’s the right thing, if something needs to be done… Make yourself do it. You’re never going to “feel like it.” Practice daily with things big and / or small without complaining.


9, 12, 15, 21



People don’t abandon people they love, they abandon people they’re using.


19, 21



When driving in the car with your kids, ask them to count motorcycles, cyclists, pedestrians. Prize to the highest count! This will train them to be on the lookout for them.


10



Keep stuff on hand for guests. Be ready to be a good host / hostess at any moment.


16-21



1

When it comes to conflict- what is your part in things?


15, 21



“ It was my high school drama teacher who made sure I knew there was space for me in this world. Her kind words had a tremendous impact on my life. If you don’t know where to begin, start with “I see you. I love you. I’m so happy you’re here.”   -Chasten Buttigieg


12



Plan a trip to New York City to see Hamilton.


15



I think the term “find myself” simply means figuring out how much of what you do/think/want/believe/care about/ feel is there because some parents, siblings, family — or institutions — or ad campaigns — or political party, or whatever put it there and fed it, vs. how much ch of all that you present to the world and to yourself, is genuine…The good, the bad, and the ugly? (Go find yourself! Tell the rest of us to F off!) xoxo


18, 21



Attend a Pride parade.


9



Police officers and members of the military put their lives on the line to protect us. Be respectful of them and thank them for their service.


9



What I most want to teach you this year is that you can always trust me. I will always love you, take care of you and never harm you. You may not always like me, but you can always trust me.


1



“Courage is cheaper than Channel. It works better too.” - Scott Galloway


14, 15, 16, 21



“You can miss a person every day and still be glad that they’re no longer in your life.” — Oprah Winfrey


19



Like Cindy Crawford said, "I eat anything I want … I just don't eat as much as I want." Be mindful of portions. No need to eliminate the junk food but keep it to a minimum.


17, 21



Your great-great grandmother was a seamstress at Marshall Fields. Her husband was a firefighter in Chicago. The immigrated from County Wexford in Ireland.


10



Be appreciative of people’s time. Send thank you notes after interviewing and applying for jobs, scholarships, etc. even if you don’t get picked. It’s common courtesy and it’s a good way to make a good impression for next time.


18, 20



Sometimes big stuff happens. Big good, big bad, big change. It will take some time to adjust. Maybe a month, a season, a semester or maybe a year or longer. Gear up. Psych yourself up for a difficult day/month/year. You can do this. Stay present, don’t get ahead of yourself or get bogged down in what’s done. “What if?” and “if-only’s” are not your friends. Be good to yourself and be good to others. Rest, nourish, create, have fun and keep the faith.


15, 21



If a girl is drunk she cannot consent. Don’t even think about hooking up when your partner is intoxicated. It’s immoral and illegal. No excuses. No exceptions. . Break this law and you will be (rightfully) charged with rape and you will get sent to prison.


15



Your brain seeks novelty. Try new things as long as you live. Take risks (but not safety risks!)


20



Universal Studios


12-18