Remember that whoever you’re grieving would only want the best for you.


20



Just because I forgive you, it doesn’t mean I trust you. Trust has to be earned.


15, 18, 21



Practice being embarrassed. Tell embarrassing stories. Help them learn how to deal with the sensation.


9



Overflowing toilet 101: Teach how to turn off the water valve and how to plunge. From now on, you break it, you fix it.


11



There’s always a temptation to throw money at your problem. But remember there’s nothing you can buy that will make up for what is really needed. And the stuff that accumulates while you try to fix the problem just ends up being a problem on its own.


14, 19



Encourage others!!!


13



When you feel like you’re on fire with anger or fear, if you can’t shake it, put that fire to good use.


14



“First the pain. Then the waiting. Then the rising.” Glennon Doyle


16, 21



Institute a “Wall of Fame” for accomplishments and victories, big and small. AND a “Wall of Shame” for minor infractions such as not changing the toilet paper roll, etc. We have to be willing to put ourselves on the wall of shame too - and that’s the lesson: We all make mistakes but we own up to them, fix them if possible and learn from them always. Also good fun. Start our with actual paper version but transition to a shared iCloud album to post wall of shame pics once they are old enough for phones. Maybe even continue through adulthood if they “shame” themselves!


5-15, 18, 21



Look into "OK Go" videos.


7-14



To quote Harvard professor Adam Grant: “Argue like you’re right and listen like you’re wrong.”


15



Sometimes you don’t know what to do, can’t figure out what’s the right direction for you. That’s okay. Try thinking about what you *don’t* want to do. (See John Cusack career plans speech in 1989 movie “Say Anything.”


11, 16, 19, 21



If you’re anything like the rest of your family you will have a lot of opinions -and that’s OK! Just remember a couple of things: First: you have a right to your opinion but you do not have a right to your own facts. facts matter. seek the truth even if i it means you are proven wrong. And second, with regard to opinions ...it’s better to not express them so much if you can help it! You may be the first in the family to get this concept and put it into practice!


13-15



Kids Can Make a Difference is a great resource for teaching little kids about poverty and equality.


6-10



“The more you sweat, the less you bleed.” True in boxing and in life. Put the work in. No shortcuts.


14, 18, 21



Make a gift of Marcus Aurelius' Meditations.


15



My mom did laundry twice a week: Tuesdays and Saturdays. She separated colors! It never piled up and we all had clean clothes. I do laundry daily, it's never done and we can't find what we need. Ask Grandma what was her secret to the science of laundry. Because it's now your job to do all your own laundry!


14



Dress for the job you want, not the one you have. Unless you're a lifeguard. ;)


16, 21



"The idea that some lives matter less is the root of all that is wrong with the world." - Paul Farmer


15, 21



Institute “Family Night” a screen-free night of games and fun and togetherness. Can use these times for conversations about things you want to address / teach. Maybe make theme nights and build around a lesson so it’s fun and enjoyable. Continue through school years.


4-6



Look into going to college abroad. Research international universities. Spain, Netherlands, etc.


15, 16



True masculinity is vulnerable, compassionate and confident. Vulnerability takes courage. Kindness/compassion takes strength. Confidence: when you’re not really interested in what others think about you. It’s a natural byproduct of living in line with your own values and priorities.


11, 14, 16, 19, 21



Favorite bible verse: Psalm 143:8 “Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have placed my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I entrust my life.”


15



You can love someone and still not tolerate their abuse. Protect your peace and safety.


17, 21



Do feel like you’re where you’re supposed to be?


19, 21



Watch Ken Burns’ “The US and the holocaust.”


17



Change the furniture around in your dorm, apartment or bedroom every once in a while. It’s an easy way to break up a timeline like for a holiday a season or after a breakup, etc.


18



It’s not fair to resent someone for being exactly who they are.


17, 21



“If you want to be holy, be kind”. -Frederick Buechner


14, 19, 21



When you have no idea what you’re doing, just be kind. Be brave. Think critically and make the best decisions you can in the moment. If possible, find resources to learn what you need to know. Ask for help if help is available. Do your best and don’t sweat it.


18