My Nana, born around 1913, used to decry “some people think the world owes them a living.” A hundred years later I agree. Nothing worse than entitlement.
We all have dark thoughts and moods every once in a while. That’s part of being human. But any sustained ideation or inclination to hurt yourself or someone else is a red flag and needs mental health intervention.
Choosing to take the easy way out will create a life that’s difficult, disappointing and dull. Don’t shy away from hard work. Mind, body, spirit, relationships, community engagement, serving others - all of these things require a ton of effort on your part. But the more you choose to invest your time and energy into what is important to you, the more your life will take shape. Take the easy way out and you’ll see things start to disintegrate. Hard work makes you who you are.
The problems with pornography: When you’re young and have yet formed a basis for healthy and mutually satisfying sexual relationships, your brain doesn’t know what to do with that input. It becomes part of your brain, imprinted as normal or the way sex should be. When you’re older, the brain can see something that’s outrageous and recognize it and discard it. Also it’s incredibly misogynistic, will do horrible things for the way you see women. While some is fairly harmless and totally normal, even too much of a good thing is a bad thing. Too much of a bad thing is disastrous.
Someone else’s success doesn’t subtract from yours. Celebrating with them and encouraging them won’t make you the loser and them the winner. We’re all in this together.
Use timers to motivate and structure. "Better have your jammies on and teeth brushed by the time the timer goes off!" Using a simple timer helps things not drag on and on.
Violent thunderstorms can be dangerous. Avoid driving or being out in severe weather: car accidents, downed trees, high winds, lightning, flash floods, etc. are all potentially deadly. Don’t take your safety for granted. If the weather is severe, stay sheltered unless you absolutely positively have to be out and about.
Not all babies are born healthy. There’s grief over that, a painful letting go of hopes and expectations, but eventually parents begin to dream different dreams for their baby. You have it within you to love deeply
Sometimes our bodies can betray us. Something goes wrong and healthy cells are replaced with broken cells: Cancer, diabetes, heart disease, auto-immune diseases, etc. Mental health can become diseased too: Depression, anxiety, compulsive behavior, suicidal thoughts. The very good news is that good medical care is available for all of these things. That, along with the love and support of family and friends helps our bodies to heal. Physical illness is obvious. Sometimes people keep their mental pain a secret. Please promise me you’ll never keep any pain you’re going through a secret.
People want to be heard. Listen to your clients, even when they're upset. Don't make excuses or anything, just let them talk. They mostly just want to be heard. Once they're calm, you can solve the problem.
Failed?
Lift yourself up, or live there.
You know the work you need to do, be it physical, mental, emotional or spiritual, etc. So do it. Do the work.
The only bitterness in failure comes from not having the guts to get back up again.
It’s hard to accept that the world can be so cruel and unfair, but sometimes accepting it and focusing on what part of it you CAN change is - I’ve learned - the key.