I really want to see Totfino, BC. There’s no one I’d rather see it with than you. xoxo


20



Read (or listen to) The Greatest Generation by Tom Brokaw together as a family. It's broken up into small vignettes so it's easy to get through bit by bit.


15



Consider what you value. Act accordingly.


10, 14, 17, 20



Home is where people love you.


21



Watch Ted Lasso together.


16



“If the pain was deep you will have to let it go many times.” Yung Pueblo from book Lighter


15, 18, 21



Throw some love at a problem.


12, 15, 21



Watch the documentary Kelce (2023)


12



“1883” Season 1 episode 6 has one of my favorite scenes about grief. “When you love someone you trade souls with them. Part of them lives in you and part of you lives with them. When they die, part of you dies with them. But a part of them lives in you.” Beautiful thought.


17, 21



“Beer muscles” is when guys gain a sense of indestructibility, an exaggerated sense of their own strength. Fights and aggressive behavior ensues.


15



Of all the things I worry about, addiction is very high on the list. Begin talks (age appropriate) about addiction.


7



No one is ever really ready to be a parent. It’s definitely on the job training! But I’ll say this: If you’re prepared to put your family’s needs before your own, you’re as ready as anyone can be.


21



Never tolerate abuse. But definitely learn how to throw annoying habits and stupid drama in the bucket of the 10% of things you don’t like about being in the relationship. Even the most beautiful stallions poo, everything produces waste. Clean the waste, deal with it as a constant byproduct of life. don’t $@!#% the horse so you don’t have to deal with poo.


17, 21



There’s a difference between looking cool and being cool. A person who wants to look cool is trying to impress other people. A person who is actually cool is true to himself /herself. Dress how it makes YOU happy! And fun fact, it’s those people who are the most well-liked because they sort of give others permission to be themselves…and everyone wants to be seen and liked for who they really are. So if you want to be popular remember three things: Be kind. Be yourself. Don’t judge


12,15



Your job is to help your kids find themselves, not to implant an agenda of your own.


1, 5, 10, 15, 20



No need to over communicate. Brief, simple succinct when conveying instructions or important information. Applies across the board personal/professional etc.


14, 17, 21



This Coda is my creation. It’s what I wanted to accomplish as a parent. What you do with it is entirely up to you. I hope you never feel like you have to do the same. Make your own way. Make yourself proud. If you’re happy, I’m happy.


21



Ask “What are you going to teach ME?” Let him work on something to teach.


11



Octavia Butler’s “Parable of the Sower.”


14



Don’t waste big money on little things. Be intentional about what you spend.


16, 21



Remember the tool of “Yes. But first...” Kids ask for things they want ALL DAY. To avoid saying”no” all day, (and avoid tantrums) don’t say no. Little One doesn’t touch her dinner except for the applesauce. Then she asks “Mommy can I have more applesauce?” Tell her “Yes!” “After you finish your meat and vegetables.”


2



If you see a kid sitting alone, he or she might be your next best friend. Go say hi! Ask him/her to sit next to you / play on your team, etc. No need to worry about whether that person is “too cool” or “not cool enough,” they’re just a kid. Like you.


8



Always have a 5 year plan. Be thinking of goals you want to work towards, however big or small. What inspires you? What drives you? What do you want to accomplish or cure or solve?


15, 17, 21



I don’t buy Mallomars. But Santa does. Another Christmas stocking tradition is chicken flickin. Rubber chickens you shoot like rubber bands.


5, 21



Don’t worry about finding your person. Focus on finding your people.


15, 21



Newborn babies don’t know their tummy hurst because they have to pass gas. They don’t know how to fall asleep when they’re tired. We have to provide all that context and help them learn about themselves. And we have to be patient with them. It’s hard work being a baby!


0, 1, 2



Keep porn to a minimum. Never at school or work. It's normal to be curious but it's really not a healthy representation of sex. Porn is a business. It's designed to get you off, not to be realistic or educational. That's not the way sex looks or how you're expected to behave. Try O.school instead.


15



Keep a pair of nail clippers in the car - much better lighting outside. Clipping tiny fingernails is terrifying!


Infant-1



1

Read “Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child” by Dr. Marc Weissbluth


Infant



Appreciate other cultures when traveling or interacting among people from different cultures. Once on a mission trip, the locals brought coffee and cookies by in the afternoons, but I never took any. I regret that lost opportunity for connection.


14, 18, 21