Other peoples’ expectations are the guard rails on the road. They keep you safe and guide you he way - literally. They keep you from driving off a cliff. So if you want to be safe, and if you do that’s great, stay within the guardrails. But if you want to fly, you’re gonna have to run right over them.
Sometimes I think the best way to take care of them is to teach them to take care of others: Littler kids, sick or disabled, those who’ve been left out.
Try silence. Just sit with it (problem/feeling/etc.) invite the problem to sit next to you and just be quiet. Five minutes every day for a week or two. Your solution will appear. Stop running and just sit with it.
A wise friend once told me that the kids will do as well as you do. You can’t be a good parent if you’re a miserable person.
Do what you need to do to stay healthy and sane.
Healing takes time. You can't rush it. Whether it's your body, your mind or your heart that's hurting... you just have to let it heal in its own time. What you CAN do is to take good care of yourself: eat, rest, stay close to loved ones. Do things that bring you joy. Revel in the smallest steps forward. You'll heal, things will get better. Trust. Love. Serve. Live.
Inevitably you will make mistakes in your career. Someone will dress you down for it. It stings. But they are doing you a favor. Thank them for it. We all have to learn, and we can’t do that if our pride gets in the way. Be humble and accept constructive criticism.
Sometimes you just have to let go. Let go of a relationship, or a dream, or plans. Let go of a person, a pet, or an object. It's hard. It takes a lot of trust.
Trust the Lord will heal the wound, no matter how deep. His goodness is infinite.
“You rarely have time for everything you want in this life, so you need to make choices. And hopefully your choices can come from a deep sense of who you are.” -Mr. Rogers
“Growth is painful. Change is painful. But nothing is as painful as remaining where you no longer belong, or where you’re unable to be yourself and thrive.” Mandy Hall (paraphrased.)
“It’s not your job to make people love you. It’s your job to show people who you are and allow them the opportunity to love you, if they want to.
If they don’t, please just let them walk away.
They were probably going to walk away anyway, they were just sticking around to see if you’d beg a little bit. Don’t even give them that.
Let them go.
You’re not a shape shifter. You’re not going to turn into the version of yourself that you think would be more lovable by the person you are trying to be loved by.
That’s not love, that’s exhausting.”
-Elyse Myers, one of my favorite Tiktokers.
You deserve to be loved for who you genuinely are.
I wish I’d read this when I was young. Would’ve saved me years of pain and frustration.
Some days it feels like your world is falling apart, but what's really happening is that it's falling into place. Make good choices. Be kind. Be brave. Trust.
“People speak of hope as if it is this delicate, ephemeral thing made of whispers and spider's webs. It's not. Hope has dirt on her face, blood on her knuckles, the grit of the cobblestones in her hair, and just spat out a tooth as she rises for another go.” -unknown
Don’t get discouraged in how slow change comes. Keep fighting for good. Some people will say it’s naive but they’re wrong. Every good thing we have in America is the result of good people fighting a seemingly impossible fight.
Start saving for retirement with your very first paycheck. Put away the MAX, you’ll never miss it. If the company doesn’t offer 401k then we’ll open a Roth IRA.
Putting up the Christmas tree the weekend or next after Thanksgiving, then watching Polar Express in the glow of the lights. Maybe the smell of gingerbread cookies baking too.
You don’t have to have everything you want. Practice saying “no thank you” to dessert or passing on the purchase you’re considering. Benefits are plentiful: Build self-discipline (which is like a muscle) and you learn you’re really ok and often happier when you don’t indulge a “want.”
Major life events such as the birth of a baby, graduations, new job, (lost job) are a big deal. Make a fuss. Take an interest in loved ones’ experiences. Acknowledge their feelings. Express a sincere interest in others (young and old) will profoundly affect your relationships.