Healing doesn’t mean becoming the best version of yourself. It’s learning to love even the worst parts about yourself.


17, 21



School shootings are a result of blind rage and complete hopelessness. First, ban the f*cking guns. But we need to teach our kids how to handle big emotions. To expect them, how learning to navigate them is like learning to fly an F16. It will be tough, yes but you will learn how to fly expertly, safely, and with your own style and flair.


12-15



Sometimes there’s nothing else to do with the pain except to use it to build a new life.


13. 17, 19, 21



“When it comes to consequences, don’t speak what you won’t serve.” Meaning don’t threaten any punishment you’re not willing to enforce. This is helpful in terms of teaching the child a lesson and also an important lesson in not shooting yourself in the foot. (I took away your tv one day you were home on a snow day. Bad idea. That punishment was against my own interest! I got no work done.


2



Sometimes I think the best way to take care of them is to teach them to take care of others: Littler kids, sick or disabled, those who’ve been left out.


5-7, 1Infant-12



Happiness: Someone (or some creature) to love, something to do and something to hope for. Don’t get too caught up in the rat race, money doesn’t mean you’ve arrived.


20



Violent thunderstorms can be dangerous. Avoid driving or being out in severe weather: car accidents, downed trees, high winds, lightning, flash floods, etc. are all potentially just don’t take your safety for granted if the weather is severe, stay sheltered unless you absolutely positively have to be out and about.


12-14, 16, 21



Buy “Good Pictures Bad Pictures: Porn-Proofing Today’s Young Kids” by Kristen Jenson


8



When I say I want you to be happy I’m not talking about pleasure and ease. I mean purpose and pride you in yourself, meaningful work, and a solid group of friends and family who loves you for who you are, so you don’t ever have to pretend to be something you’re not.


21



“The Greatest Generation” by Tom Brokaw Listen to audio or read together


14



Replace “but” with “and.” “I love you but...” Becomes “I love you and that’s why...” etc.


9



When something is upsetting you...Name it...Take a deep breath...Imagine holding it gently in your hands. (This is a reminder to use this visualization myself and to teach it to you. I want to give you as many tools as I can to help you learn to cope with negative emotions in a healthy way.)


11



1

Read maps.


9-14



When it comes to judging your behavior at school/ sports/ work, ask: Was I fair? Was I kind? Did I put in the work? If the answers are all “Yes,” then rest well. If an answer is “No,” then fix it.


16



Check out Harmonia School on Mill St Music Art Theatre


6



“Natural” deodorant doesn’t work. Go with trusted brands here. There are times when it’s fine not to look your best, but stinky is never okay.


13, 18



When you apologize don’t offer excuses just acknowledge your mistake, apologize for the consequences, and assure them it won’t happen again.


12, 16, 21



Alka-Seltzer is great for a hangover or even better, take it before you go to bed after partying. Disclaimer I’m talking about a few drinks. For the love of everything holy, please don’t ingest insane amounts of alcohol at a time. Buzzed is fun, drunk is stupid. And dangerous. Never drive once you’ve had a drink or weed.


18



Go to minor league baseball games this summer. Better seats, less crowds, easier, cheaper. Great players. Kids won't know the difference.


9-15



“It’s best if we don’t speak for a while.” Practice it


19, 21



Sponsor a child in a developing country. Write letters, learn about their country and their life.


8



You never know what people are going through. Depression, PTSD, anxiety could look like avoidance, anger, risk-taking, promiscuity, etc. Look out for friends, coworkers and loved ones who may be in pain. You don’t need to solve their problem, just allow for the possibility that they’re going through something. Try to give them the benefit of the doubt and not write off “bad” behavior as a character flaw. Offer a non-judgmental ear.


15, 20



Shampoo their hair. Nice luxurious shampoo. It’s a treat. In “5 Love Languages” speak, its an act of service and physical touch.


5, 7, 9, 12



If you don’t know what to do ask yourself how you want to feel. Once you have a good idea of that you can find lots of paths to get you there.


16, 21



Most people are good. Some are bad. Many are crazy.


15, 21



When you feel sad, mad, confused or in any way upset, go to a quiet place to catch your breath. If you can sit with it and let it tell you what it wants to tell you, then you become its friend. But if you try to deny the feeling, or numb it, it grows much stronger and it fights you.


9, 13, 19



Keep stuff on hand for guests. Be ready to be a good host / hostess at any moment.


16-21



The $@!#% never ends. Dealing with the $@!#% IS your job. If you think you’ll ever reach a “post-$@!#%” stage in your life, you’re wrong.


14, 19



Read up on the adolescent brain.


11, 13



Some kids have trouble with learning how to managing their anger and other big feelings. We all do! It’s good to give them grace. But steer clear of those who think mean is cool. You don’t have time for anyone who actually tries to be an a-hole.


6, 9, 12, 16, 21