Just because you miss your ex that doesn’t mean you want them back. Of course you miss someone you had a deep connection with.
17, 21
If you get comfortable telling little lies it will be easier to tell big lies. Tell the truth, even on small matters. (Except if your friends ask if they look fat. Then it’s okay to lie!)
13, 18, 21
Have the first of many talks about what consent means. Tell them (boys AND girls) that consent needs to be informed, enthusiastic, sober, ongoing and freely given. Stress that, in no uncertain terms, the absence of consent is rape. Discuss the legal, moral and emotional consequences.
12
Tell them who they are: kind, creative, smart etc. A person of honor and integrity, a part of the divine universe. Demonstrate for them what it means to live according to your values. Encourage them to listen to their body, guide them on how they might best find (and align with) their truest nature. Listen to them when they’re exploring what that might look like. Support them when they decide.
1, 2, 5, 7, 12, 16, 18, 21
Zoom out! Perspective is your friend. At certain times in our lives we have the focus turned up so high that we don’t see beyond ourselves. (Adolescence is one of those times, totally natural.) Zoom out. You’ll feel better.
13, 15, 17, 21
Great reminders for how to deal with belligerent kids. https://mailchi.mp/ahaparenting/8-things-you-can-do-when-your-child-is-belligerent
4
Read article about Digital Learning/ transitioning to doing homework on a computer. http://community.today.com/parentingteam/post/it-doesnt-have-to-stay-on-the-screen
10
We all want to be liked. But consider what you’re willing to *not* be liked for: If things like kindness and loyalty and being genuinely yourself *cost* you friends, is that a bad thing? Were they really friends then? Try not to do or say anything simply out of a desire to be liked.
11, 13, 16, 21
When something is upsetting you...Name it...Take a deep breath...Imagine holding it gently in your hands. (This is a reminder to use this visualization myself and to teach it to you. I want to give you as many tools as I can to help you learn to cope with negative emotions in a healthy way.)
11
There are things you should not say: Never comment or ask a woman about her age or weight. Never comment on how many kids someone has (or doesn’t have.) The size, timing, composition, etc of someone else’s family is not your business to weigh in on. You never know who is struggling with loss or infertility, etc. And if someone announces they are expecting their seventh kid, the only correct response is “Congratulations” “How are you feeling?” etc. Just like you would if it was their first. Never ask someone how much weight they lost. If they’ve lost weight, just say “You look wonderful/amazing/ fantastic, etc.” And of course never comment on anyone having gained weight. Just say “You look wonderful.” And never never never ask someone how much money they earn or how much money they have, or how much they owe or paid for something, etc. People’s finances are personal, and are just not any of your business.
15, 20
Sadness means you need love. (From another person, a pet, yourself.) Someone whose presence brings you comfort. May be dead, living, fictional, historical figure, religious (god, saints, Buddha, etc.) Live and in person is best though. Let someone love you how you need to be loved.
19, 21
“You’ll never be alone when you carry a poet in your pocket.” - John Adams Bring a book with you wherever you go.
12, 19
To paraphrase Ted Lasso, it’s the people who think they’ve got it all figured out who delight in judging people and events. It’s better to be open minded, ask questions. Be curious, not judgmental.
15, 21
Give your all on the job, from your first day to your last day there. If you’re all caught up on your work help someone else with theirs.
17, 21
Time management skills. Look for current resources. Teach about making lists when you're feeling overwhelmed. Start with listing 5 to-do's. Tackle the top 3 of those. Then reassess. New priorities? If no, keep going down the list. If yes, add them to the list in whatever order of importance.
12
Professor Scott Galloway’s advice: Paraphrasing his standard wedding toast: “1. Express affection and desire. Everyone wants to be wanted. It’s healthy and it is part of what makes your relationship singular. 2. Never let your wife / girlfriend be hungry or cold. Two thirds of the really awful arguments you’ll have it’s because someone is hungry or cold. Carry blankets and protein bars. (You’re welcome.) 3. Don’t keep score. Decide what kind of friend / son / daughter / spouse / employee / human being you want to be, and practice being that. Put the scorecard away.”
21
Protect women from gross men: First, don’t be gross. Second, resist the urge to go along with the pack when they get gross. Third, and this is going to take courage, tell them to knock that sh*t off. Never make a girl feel uncomfortable to get a laugh. It’s not funny, it’s scary and demeaning and will teach her you can’t be trusted.
10, 14, 17, 21
Enroll in cooking lessons. We'll need to find you someone who knows how to cook. (Don't tell mom I said that.)
14
Be a good guest. Never arrive to a dinner or a party empty handed. Bring a gift: flowers, food, drink, etc.
18
"Discipline is helping a child solve a problem. Punishment is making a child suffer for having a problem. To raise problem solvers, focus on solutions, not retribution.”- L.R KNost
2-15