Being numb is not the same thing as being happy.


15-18



Read "A Wrinkle in Time" (me too.)


10



You have to be in a good place to be able to make good choices. If you’re run-down, sick, grieving, addicted or in a really bad relationship, etc. you won’t be able to make healthy choices. It’s a catch 22 I know. My point is that you have to take care of yourself (or get help) so you can be in a position to make healthy, good choices.


17, 21



Read JAMA article by Brooke Peterson Gabster.


18



Fact: when you drink to excess you are significantly more likely to cause harm to someone or be harmed yourself. Being drunk means surrendering your ability to keep yourself and others safe.


12, 15, 18



Take out your aggression on inanimate things, never on people or animals.


9



Trust me when I tell you that one day you’ll look back and realize you judged people unfairly and you held strong to convictions only to end up changing your mind about in the light of life experience. Leave a little space open for second impressions or the possibility that you could be wrong.


17



All behavior is communication.


2-6



Some relationships (or jobs) are f*cked, and cannot be unf*cked. Release them and move on.


21



Ask “What are you going to teach ME?” Let him work on something to teach.


11



When you’re at home in your own skin you invite people to be at home in theirs too.


14, 20



Book: “victory. Stand!” By Tommie Smith


14



You always have a choice. Always.


15, 19, 21



Talk about the difference between not feeling comfortable and not feeling safe.


7, 11, 14, 19. 21



When you apologize don’t offer excuses just acknowledge your mistake, apologize for the consequences, and assure them it won’t happen again.


12, 16, 21



“God is gentle and loving. He desires you to have a deep sense of safety in His love.” - paraphrasing Henri Nouwen


16



Try using “No doesn’t tell me your needs” when toddler / little kid disobeys. “Were you trying to be funny? Do you need a minute?”


3



“The flower does not dream of the bee. It blossoms


15



When you meet people in an intimidating situation, like a job interview, etc. An easy trick is to imagine them as they were in kindergarten. (Don't talk to them like they'r 5 year-olds! But relate to them on a human level. We're all human - filled with talents and fears and insecurities. No matter how "important" or "unimportant" our station is.


16-21



Start saving for retirement with your very first paycheck. Put away the MAX, you’ll never miss it. If the company doesn’t offer 401k then we’ll open a Roth IRA.


18



C.S. Lewis books. (Children’s and adult.)


12, 21



Don’t worry if they’re not listening to what you say...They watch what you do. They study it.


13



Grit.


14



Spend time with people you admire, in person and biographies, documentaries, novels and movies.


14-17, 21



If you see a kid sitting alone, he or she might be your next best friend. Go say hi! Ask him/her to sit next to you / play on your team, etc. No need to worry about whether that person is “too cool” or “not cool enough,” they’re just a kid. Like you.


8



Take heart. There are lots of terrible things in the world - Poverty, disease, injustice, natural disasters...Thankfully, good FAR outweighs the bad: Love, Faith, Art, friendship, healing, creativity, community, innovation, beauty and renewal to name just a few. Focus on the good. Relish in the countless expressions of goodness. Work hard to preserve, protect, and advance them.


18



Bring Christmas cookies to local fire station and police station. (Annually)


6



1

Resentment is a sign you are giving too much and are in need of replenishment. It’s a good example of how even the “negative” emotions are on your side, interpreting your experience in the world.


16, 18, 21



Your brain seeks novelty. Try new things as long as you live. Take risks (but not safety risks!)


20