Dress to people will listen to you, not look at you. (This is especially true at school and work.)


15, 18, 21



Have a yearly “review” right before school year. Raise allowance as appropriate. If they want more money, they’ll have to take on more responsibilities.


7-17



1

Never open someone else's mail, or listen to their conversation, etc. If it's not your business to know, don't snoop.


14-21



Keep your pants on until you (and your partner) are at least 18. Keep your pants on if you or your partner are drunk. Keep your pants on if you or your partner are not 100% enthusiastic about going farther.


15



Avoid love bombing.


15, 17, 21



Listen to The Moth (storytelling) together.


15



Let go of things that aren’t good for you. Anger, fear, prejudice, obsession, grudges, snark, etc.


16, 21



Teach car maintenance: Adding air to tires, checking oil, etc.


13-17



Give people the benefit of the doubt. Unless someone gives you a reason not to trust them, assign the best possible motive to their actions.


14-18



Never post a pic to social media that you wouldn't want Grandma to see. NEVER send or ask to receive naked pictures. It's tacky, gross, illegal and not worth it. Even if "everyone does it". It's rude and disrespectful.


11-13, 18



General rule for health and happiness: avoid excess.


10, 14, 17, 21



Say it early and repeat it often, so that it sinks way down deep: There is nothing you could do to make me stop loving you. No mistake, no failure, no decision, nothing. There is no hole so deep that if you fell into it I wouldn’t climb down to help you out of. I love you no matter what.


7



Teach them how to eat a chicken wing in one bite


12



A mommy-friend of mine gave me some good advice: "Count the wins." So what if you didn't clean the house, you showered! So what if she's wearing 9 different colors - she dressed herself! Great advice. So remember, especially on the difficult days - and there will be many: Count the wins.


1



Not knowing what you’re doing is a lot less terrifying than not knowing who to trust.


14, 19, 21



Remember what a teenaged sh*t you were before throwing in the towel on the next generation. We’re all self-centered, entitled and oblivious when we’re young. The goal is that they don’t *stay* that way. Be the parent they need, and they’ll listen. It may take a year or twenty, but they’ll see the light if you just pour love into them.


12-21



At dinner time, go around the table and share your “highs and lows” for the day. (Re-ticket up to 21)


5



"Tough times don't last. Tough people do."


11-14



To avoid miscommunication and misplaced expectations, tell your partner what you need from them. But if what you need is for them to be a different person, that’s not fair to them or to you. Let them go and set about finding the right person.


18, 20



“You don’t get what you deserve. You get what you negotiate.” - name escapes me


15, 19, 21



You never know what people are going through. Depression, PTSD, anxiety could look like avoidance, anger, risk-taking, promiscuity, etc. Look out for friends, coworkers and loved ones who may be in pain. You don’t need to solve their problem, just allow for the possibility that they’re going through something. Try to give them the benefit of the doubt and not write off “bad” behavior as a character flaw. Offer a non-judgmental ear.


15, 20



Conflict resolution tip: Are we talking about how we got here, or how we get out of here? Because those are two entirely different conversations.


14, 16, 20



Remind them they’re safe to feel whatever they’re feeling.


2, 12, 21



You are not your thoughts. Focus more on your choices / actions.


17



ABC's of video game addiction: Autonomy, Belonging, Control. Try to find ways to developing these things in areas outside of gaming. Games are great, but not at the expense of everything else.


1Infant-13



1

School shootings are a result of blind rage and complete hopelessness. First, ban the f*cking guns. But we need to teach our kids how to handle big emotions. To expect them, how learning to navigate them is like learning to fly an F16. It will be tough, yes but you will learn how to fly expertly, safely, and with your own style and flair.


12-15



Avoid bird seed or pet food near your home. It attracts mice, rats, ticks, etc. keep bird feeders that use seed a good distance from the house. Try liquid feeders near windows. Or use a feed tray or hulled seeds (little waste.)


20



“It’s best if we don’t speak for a while.” Practice it


19, 21



Anything you deny or fight will fight you back harder. Don’t fight the fear, pain, disappointment, etc. Let it in and let it teach you what it wants to teach you. Then you can part as friends.


15, 21



Be generous in all things. That is my hope for you.


14, 18, 21



1