Imagine a hundred different lives. Try a dozen of them. Fail at most of them. That’s part of what your twenties are for. Challenge yourself. Challenge your assumptions. Change your perspective. Grow.


20



Summers in Ireland and UK Drama camps? I could work from there while he did his thing.


12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17



On days when you wake up tired, sick or just not ready to deal with the morning, just get up and take a shower. Turn up the music. Rally!


17-21



Just because I forgive you, it doesn’t mean I trust you. Trust has to be earned.


15, 18, 21



Beware that when you’re first exposed to a new thing: a car, a college tour, house, etc. you will feel AMAZING and totally seduced by the shiny newness. Be cool. Remember that glitters is not gold. Things don’t need to be perfect and even if the house is it doesn’t mean life will be.


15, 18, 21



If they like you you’ll know. If they don’t you’ll be confused.


15, 21



Name a few male celebrities you would feel safe with alone in a room. Keanu Reeves, Jack Black, Barack Obama, to start us off.


11, 13, 15



Other peoples’ expectations are the guard rails on the road. They keep you safe and guide you he way - literally. They keep you from driving off a cliff. So if you want to be safe, and if you do that’s great, stay within the guardrails. But if you want to fly, you’re gonna have to run right over them.


18, 21



Relationships can end beautifully and bravely. They’re not all going to be forever. It’s much better to grieve the end of a relationship than to endure an unhealthy one.


15, 19, 21



If you don’t know what to do ask yourself how you want to feel. Once you have a good idea of that you can find lots of paths to get you there.


16, 21



Drill on stuff that will be valuable throughout their lifetime: Vocabulary, geography, addition and subtraction.


10, 12, 14, 20



Get really clear about what you want so that you’ll be able to recognize it when it’s here. Get really clear on the kind of relationship you want so that you can realize when it’s not with the person you’re seeing.


17, 21



The Golden Rule is wrong. At least when it comes to relationships and especially when it comes to parenting. Instead of treating someone how you’d want to be treated, treat them how THEY’D want to be treated.__ Learn what THEY need to feel safe and loved, how THEY express big feelings like fear, anxiety, anger and frustration.___ Instead of assuming the friend/partner/child /coworker wants to be treated how you’d want to be, take the time to learn about them. Then when someone you love is in distress you can respond to them in the way they need. ___(Lesson learned from reading The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman. Great book. A little preachy but push past that. )


1, 13, 19



Be a safe place. Teach them to be a safe place too.


12



One of the most important things I can teach you is to help you learn how to deal with big feelings without resorting to destructive behavior or violence. Everyone on the planet will experience loss, disappointment, grief, heartbreak, betrayal, etc. Tools to deal with these feelings: counseling, journaling, art, music, exercise, meditation, breathing exercises, yoga, being in nature, talking with friends, joining a support group, movement like dancing or skating, singing, acting, anthropomorphic dialogue with your emotions, naming your emotions and describe how they physically feel in your body. Asking the emotion what it needs you to know.


1Infant-20



Listen to albums. Two of my favorites came out the very same month: Cowboy Carter by Beyoncé and The Tortured Poets Department by Taylor Swift.


12



Let’s talk about hungry kids. What can we do to help? Donate? Volunteer? Start a Little Free Pantry?


7-12



Look into summer jobs at national parks.


15, 17



Keep stuff on hand for guests. Be ready to be a good host / hostess at any moment.


16-21



Be generous in all things. That is my hope for you.


14, 18, 21



1

Sex: There's no single way to do it "right" but there are lots of ways to do it wrong. Not being respectful and tender towards your partner is usually at the root of "wrong" ways to do it. Also, there is no rush. You may think all your friends are "doing it." They're not. Take your time.


16



End of August by Robert Frost is one of my favorite poems.


20



Check in on your friends. Even the ones that seem fine.


14-21



1

Golf lessons this year. Your grandpa loved golf. He tried to teach me when he first got sick, and those are some of my best memories of him. Great way to get fresh air and exercise too.


11



Before heading out for a good time, make a mental note on the ways you could wreck or end your life if bad stuff happened: Sick/hurt/dead from alcohol or drugs, unintended pregnancy, or being raped (or being charged with rape.) What do u have to do to protect yourself and keep things from going from good times to life-changing nightmare. Keep your wits about ya. And look out for your friends too.


15, 17, 18, 19, 21



Keep your pants on until you (and your partner) are at least 18. Keep your pants on if you or your partner are drunk. Keep your pants on if you or your partner are not 100% enthusiastic about going farther.


15



You’re gonna be misunderstood a lot. Some people just won’t like you. It’s okay. Wish them well and let it go.


10, 13, 16, 21



On a job interview, mention a high-level educational goal such as MBA or law school. Their estimation of you will go up without them even realizing it. Your offer will be higher. Also follow, up with a brief but we’ll-written (professional) thank you note/email whatever.


17, 19, 21



“Anger is a wonderful catalyst but a terrible companion.” - Brene Brown


15, 21