One regret I have is how sure I was that I was in the right. Looking back I can see now that there were plenty of times when I was the a-hole. I wish I had been able to be circumspect.


14, 17, 21



They’re not rejecting you, they’re just becoming who they are. Give them some space.


12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17



Just put your best foot forward and get on with it!


14, 17, 21



Theme this year: Self Control (Repeat every year until age 99)


6



I’m going to start you in Mathnasium or some other STEM (math) activity. Not because I want u to score high on your SAT but because I want You to be confident in your math skills you will use it every day and it will come in handy no matter what you choose to do for a living


7



Be generous in all things. That is my hope for you.


14, 18, 21



Share a few of our most embarrassing moments. Teach them it’s okay to laugh at yourself and even when you’re mortified in the moment being embarrassed isn’t fatal. (And it happens to everyone.)


11



Sit down together and write house rules on anger. We don’t hit or bite. Do we yell and slam doors? Name-call? Say “I don’t love you” ? Bad words? What’s appropriate anger and what’s unacceptable?


4-6



Spread kindness like confetti.


12, 21



Floss!!! All kinds of health benefits including decreased risk for heart disease and diabetes. Plus you get to keep your teeth. It's a no-brainer.


14, 18, 21



So what you can. If you’re overwhelmed or depressed, and I can’t get it together to brush your teeth, rinse with water. Tomorrow, rinse with mouthwash. In a few days, brush without bothering to put toothpaste on the brush. This is a pretty extreme example but u get the picture. If you can’t do a load of laundry, just pick up the clothes into a pile. Tomorrow separate the pile. If you can’t face doing a full leg day at the gym, do one rep. Just do what you can, and eventually you will get up to speed. Give yourself grace, my love.


15, 17, 21



I don’t remember much about my grandmother (Marie) but I recall her hands. Her ring fingers had a funny curve to them, bowed in a little at the top. My ring fingers do the same thing. I think of her every time I notice it.


19



One of my favorite scenes in a movie is James Bond with Pierce Brosnan. Bullets are whizzing by him and he just so of gives a mildly annoyed look while focusing on what he’s doing. It’s quintessential cool.


15, 21



Practice having difficult conversations. There’s no way to get around being on the giving or receiving end of unpleasant news such as breakups, firings, news of a loved one’s passing, etc. You need to get good at having hard conversations, or else you’ll end up in jobs and relationships you don’t want to be in.


15, 21



If there’s a ever a bird in the house, close the interior doors, open the doors to the outside and shoo it out with a broom.


18



Read “Lighter” by Yung Pueblo. Read it every year.


17, 19, 21



Institute “Family Night” a screen-free night of games and fun and togetherness. Can use these times for conversations about things you want to address / teach. Maybe make theme nights and build around a lesson so it’s fun and enjoyable. Continue through school years.


4-6



Sioux Nation quote: No one heals himself by wounding another.


16



No need to over communicate. Brief, simple succinct when conveying instructions or important information. Applies across the board personal/professional etc.


14, 17, 21



Little trick for acne treatment: dandruff shampoo. Wash your face with Head and Shoulders and watch your skin clear up.


13-17



Clip nails after bath. It’s easier to do when they’re softer. (Teach them the same thing when they’re old enough to do it for themselves.)


1, 10



If they’re not doing anything dangerous, illegal or immoral, let them be. Give them space and independence. (Just first define dangerous/ illegal/ immoral. Then remind them that you are here and would love to hear about anything they want to share.)


14



Motivation: Just start. Two minutes. You don’t need to feel good to get going, you need to get going to give yourself a chance to feel good.


16



You can’t hit ‘em all outta the park. Some days (dates, reviews, vacations, report cards, etc.) are just going to fall flat. No worries, the next one will be better.


15, 19



Soothe a newborn: Swaddle , shushing noise, swing, side/stomach position, suck on a binkie. Read The Happiest Baby on the Block by Dr. Harvey Karp (or watch the video.) It' a life-saver.


Infant



Changed behavior is the only real apology.


15



Small joys are what gets you through big grief.


14, 18, 21



Work Hard. Do your best. Keep your word. Never get too big for your britches. Trust in God. Have no fear


15, 21



A wise friend once told me "Don't dump grace down the drain." Respond to nudges: Speak up even if you're afraid, reach out to someone who's hurting, forgive someone (or yourself.) God is so good and so generous...accept his gifts.


15



The app "Bark" detects messaging containing cyber-bullying, sexting, signs of depression or suicidal thoughts, etc.


11