Offer gifts to the Lord. Maybe it's your school work, or your career, or the kid you raise, or your life in general. Wrap it up and make it a present to the Lord.


9-15



Discuss the concept that “It’s not always about you.” Some days need to be about supporting someone else in their joy - or sorrow. Your needs take a backseat.


11, 14, 17



1

Happiness comes from giving and helping, not buying and having.


14, 19



Relationship advice: Is she interesting? You’ll spend more time with her than anyone in your life. Does she make you laugh? Will she make a good mom? Life is long. These are the things that matter.” -Paraphrased quote from Barack Obama


21



You’re going to be okay if your relationship ends. You were a whole person before them and you’ll be a whole person after. - therapy Jeff


15, 21



People who have something to prove are dangerous to themselves and others. We are all worthy of love. Remember that.


11, 13, 17, 19, 21



Read “Spare” by Prince Harry.


20



Beware that when you’re first exposed to a new thing: a car, a college tour, house, etc. you will feel AMAZING and totally seduced by the shiny newness. Be cool. Remember that glitters is not gold. Things don’t need to be perfect and even if the house is it doesn’t mean life will be.


15, 18, 21



Write “thank you” notes, send pics of them wearing the outfit Grandma gave, etc. You get so many gifts...Be a grateful recipient.


7



Everything not saved will be lost. This is true for documents in Word and in life.


16



Take heart. There are lots of terrible things in the world - Poverty, disease, injustice, natural disasters...Thankfully, good FAR outweighs the bad: Love, Faith, Art, friendship, healing, creativity, community, innovation, beauty and renewal to name just a few. Focus on the good. Relish in the countless expressions of goodness. Work hard to preserve, protect, and advance them.


18



Action is the antithesis of anxiety.


18



Find an activity / sport that they enjoy and support it. Get them outside and in the fresh air.


6-16



None of us sit high enough to look down on anybody.


11, 14, 17, 21



Golf lessons. Grampa loved golf, if he were here he would have taught you himself.


9



Violent thunderstorms can be dangerous. Avoid driving or being out in severe weather: car accidents, downed trees, high winds, lightning, flash floods, etc. are all potentially deadly. Don’t take your safety for granted. If the weather is severe, stay sheltered unless you absolutely positively have to be out and about.


12-14, 16, 21



Buy “Good Pictures Bad Pictures: Porn-Proofing Today’s Young Kids” by Kristen Jenson


8



Look into Rustic Pathways to see the world and do some good.


15



I did my best to guide you, but I’m sure there are many areas where my take is just not aligned with yours. That’s okay! Bunny please don’t feel any obligation to believe what I believe or take any advice, or continue any tradition mentioned in this Coda.


21



You’re gonna want to quit, many times. Whether it’s a job, a marriage, a degree, a cause… whatever. I have no way of knowing whether or not you should quit, just know that feeling like you want to quit is normal when you hit a setback or disappointment, or rejection or betrayal. It doesn’t necessarily mean you’re going to feel that way forever. Sometimes it’s best to cut your losses, sometimes it’s better to stick it out. Treat yourself with patience and compassion while you consider what’s best.


14, 17, 21



Go as a family to local high school musical productions.


9-13



1

My worst fear is that I will be unable to reach you when you’re in pain. All I want as a parent, what my whole job boils down to, is to be there when you need me. How can I help you?


13



“Bullies are scared people hiding inside scary people.” -Michelle Obama


8-12



Just because you miss your ex that doesn’t mean you want them back. Of course you miss someone you had a deep connection with.


17, 21



Practice a neutral expression: Interested but not excited. A “poker face” is a good skill to know and will come in handy a lot!


13, 16, 18, 21



Puberty is like putting a 12 year old in the pilot seat of a fighter jet. A total sh*t show at first, then better but still erratic and dramatic until they really get a feel for the speed and the pressure, the gauges, etc. They’ll learn when to question or to trust their instincts. Tell him that he’ll fly this jet for the rest of his life and it will always be dangerous because it’s an effing jet, but he will learn how to fly it expertly. He’ll do good, have fun, accomplish missions and refuel.


12



A useful opening line in a conversation (personal, parenting or professional) is “What should I know about ...”. It shows you understand you have something to learn, and it makes people feel valued. “What should I know about what’s going on at football practice?”


14



Read (or listen to) A Fragile Stone together.


15



I stopped worrying about you by the time you were seven. (I’m not talking about your safety and health, that I’ll always worry about!) But I knew you were a joyful, generous, kind, smart and well-mannered person. You were a great friend, supportive and fun. You would be a good partner, and would contribute so much good to society. I could see you had a curious mind, an active imagination and more than a healthy dose of courage.


15, 21



Concussion testing - baseline


15