Talk to them about how dangerous it is to buy pills online. Fentanyl is ubiquitous and lethal in small doses. Never never take a pull that wasn’t prescribed or purchased legally.


12



You may end up being a big shot, Good for you! But check yourself. The good lord wasn't above washing his friends' dirty feet so please don't feel like you're above any task that needs to be done. Enjoy your success but stay humble.


20



Never give unsolicited advice. Instead ask “How can I best support you?”


14, 20



There are always blessings hidden within heartbreak: a friend you would never have met otherwise, an opportunity that would never have come up, an experience, an encounter, a promotion, etc. Always look for the blessings.


9, 11, 18, 21



Sit down together and write house rules on anger. We don’t hit or bite. Do we yell and slam doors? Name-call? Say “I don’t love you” ? Bad words? What’s appropriate anger and what’s unacceptable?


4-6



No one knows what they’re doing. Just be kind and brave and curious. You don’t have to have it figured out.


17



“Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people.” - Eleanor Roosevelt


13, 19



People will speak or act in all kinds of unpleasant ways. Stay calm and kind.


14-21



Don’t worry about finding your person. Focus on finding your people.


15, 21



To paraphrase Ted Lasso, it’s the people who think they’ve got it all figured out who delight in judging people and events. It’s better to be open minded, ask questions. Be curious, not judgmental.


15, 21



Read at least one biography every semester. between winners and losers read about the failures read about the great men and women read about historical figures American icon stage and film to battlefields to business read all about how great men and women made themselves great and learn from them here are a few to start Ted Kennedy he gets north star am Kristin Chenoweth Tina Fey I’m reading one now on call baker from the Bush administration Barack Obama Jimmy Carter Ronald Reagan Kennedy Roosevelt all those guys as well as Michelle Obama Jackie Kennedy all of those. Draft


19



Book “8 Candles and a Tree” about celebrating interfaith holidays.


7



Difficult conversations: Break-ups, layoffs, etc. happen. Practice delivering bad news and getting bad news.


15-21



If your partner doesn’t want to commit to you, it’s not a matter of convincing them. Even if you get them to walk down the aisle that’s not the problem. It’s not that they don’t want to get married, it’s that they don’t want to BE married to you. And that is not a problem that will go away even if you manage to “get” them to commit. Walk away or spend the rest of your life pulling them along. F that.


21



Ask him for Christmas present: recite Andy Weir’s “The Egg.” Bonus points for memorization! Also great idea for audition tape. )I’m assuming you’ll be in theater!) xoxo


15



Try silence. Just sit with it (problem/feeling/etc.) invite the problem to sit next to you and just be quiet. Five minutes every day for a week or two. Your solution will appear. Stop running and just sit with it.


16



Teach him what to do and how to act if he gets pulled over.


16



A lesson from author Tom Zumba. I hope you’ll never need it: “There is nothing nothing easy about this thing called grief. Nothing. But I ask you to please please please say yes more often than you say no. Say yes to you. To possibility. To hope. To love. To life. To healing. Please choose the light more often than you choose the darkness. Not that there aren't gifts in the darkness. There are. But it's often so much easier to find them the gifts in the light. Do all you can to stay in the light. Please remember that the person you love so so so dearly lived. Don't forget that. He lived. She lived. Here with you. And your relationship continues. Always. Don't be so overwhelmed and paralyzed and pissed off that he died that she died that you spend most of your time focusing on their death. Focus on your life. Together. Say yes as often as you can. Choose light as often as you can. Remember that he lived as often as you can. Don't lose her in the details of her death. This thing called grief is hard hard hard work. But you are stronger than you think. His book is called Permission to Mourn


21



Never follow an “I love you” with a “but...” Instead, follow it with “and...” or “that’s why...” Remember this when they’re young, teach it to them when they’re older.


10, 20



Failed? Lift yourself up, or live there. You know the work you need to do, be it physical, mental, emotional or spiritual, etc. So do it. Do the work. The only bitterness in failure comes from not having the guts to get back up again.


12, 16, 18, 20, 21



Letting go isn’t something active. Rather, it’s something you stop doing. Stop hoping. Stop fooling yourself. Stop wishing things were different.


17, 21



Tell them who they are: kind, creative, smart etc. A person of honor and integrity, a part of the divine universe. Demonstrate for them what it means to live according to your values. Encourage them to listen to their body, guide them on how they might best find (and align with) their truest nature. Listen to them when they’re exploring what that might look like. Support them when they decide.


1, 2, 5, 7, 12, 16, 18, 21



Put a few drops of tea tree oil in their shampoo bottle to keep lice at bay. If there’s a outbreak at school, add more. (Or spritz their hair with a tea tree oil solution.)


5-7



“Pay yourself first” means save before you spend. You never know when you’ll need to tap into savings, so build it up early and heartily.


18



Just do the next right thing. One step at a time, you’ll get there.


13, 18, 21



Recipe for happiness that stands the test of time: Be who you are, and figure out how you are uniquely equipped to serve.


15, 21



You gotta play with them. Down on the floor, at the park, in the water, in the snow. Connect through play, it will be the foundation of your relationship.


1-4



“Your warmth can be an invitation that unlocks their own.” - Elizabeth Lesser. I love this quote because it’s so true that when you’re kind and genuine, people respond. They take it as a signal that you are a safe place for them to express themselves, which will enable a true connection to be formed. You both win when that happens.


15, 21



Super good-looking people often don’t develop good people skills because they’ve been able to get by on their looks. Listen! Beauty fades. Get curious about people who don’t necessarily catch your eye right away.


16, 19, 21



You will never have to hustle for your self-worth. You are worthy of love and respect simply because you exist. Same goes for every other human.


16