Let people do what they want to do so you can see what they’d rather do.


16



Be the kind of man that people feel safe around. Safe from harm, safe from judgment and safe from ridicule.


17



Teach them what to do if they hit an animal while driving on the road. (First find out what you’re supposed to do, THEN teach them.)


16



Ask your emotions “why” three times.


14, 16, 21



Writing is thinking.


14, 17. 21



People always say “Be yourself.” That’s good advice but really what does it mean? I think it’s easier to explain what it DOESN’T mean: When you’re being yourself you’re not pretending to be interested in something or someone you’re not. You’re not doing something just to please someone else (or just to tick them off.) You’re not wearing anything that makes you feel uncomfortable. You’re not pretending to have fun when you’re not having fun. You’re not trying to impress anyone. You’re not trying to fade into the background. You’re not trying to change anything about yourself or someone else. I think that’s a good start. What does “being yourself” mean to you?


11-14, 18, 21



Micro-internships. Check out Parker Dewey for ideas.


16, 17, 18



Always hold the door open for the next person.


4-14



“Write hard and clear about what hurts.” - Ernest Hemingway


12, 15, 21



The kindest person in the room may not necessarily be the smartest. But the cruelest person is always the dumbest.


10, 15, 21



People have big feelings when they realize how unjust and unfair the world can be. Totally natural and healthy. The problem starts when they channel those feelings into destructive actions and beliefs: violence, war, crime and hatred. We will be so much better off if we can learn to deal with our collective and individual pain in a way that is therapeutic and constructive. Maybe we can help each other to be creative in the face of fear, grief, pain, anxiety, anger, betrayal, injustice.


14, 16, 19, 21



Remember the tool of “Yes. But first...” Kids ask for things they want ALL DAY. To avoid saying”no” all day, (and avoid tantrums) don’t say no. Little One doesn’t touch her dinner except for the applesauce. Then she asks “Mommy can I have more applesauce?” Tell her “Yes!” “After you finish your meat and vegetables.”


2



Check in on your friends. Even the ones that seem fine.


14-21



1

Get at least 2, preferably 3 estimates on any major expenses for home or car.


21



“You don’t emerge from $@!#% empty-handed” a friend once told me. Even the worst periods of your life will bring gifts. Be thankful for those gifts, and enjoy them.


19



Remember this: “It’s not always about you.” It’s a natural tendency to take things personally- someone’s bad mood, or not paying attention to you, or not calling, etc. But most times when we see people acting shy/aloof/crabby or mean - it has nothing to do with us and everything to do with them, and what they’re experiencing. Try (a) not to take things personally and (b) to have compassion for people, who are all going through something.


12, 16, 20



“Praise in public. Discipline in private.” This is good advice for when you’re a parent and for when you’re a boss.


20



Check out from the library or Amazon: “My First Money Book: A Guide for Parents and Children to Saving, Spending, Sharing, and Investing Your Money” by Reggie Nelson


8



Relationships can end beautifully and bravely. They’re not all going to be forever. It’s much better to grieve the end of a relationship than to endure an unhealthy one.


15, 19, 21



Marriage vows won’t “fix” anything about a relationship. They won’t change how a person communicates. Never start out a relationship with the hope or expectation that your partner will change (or if they are hoping you will change.)It’s not fair to either of you. Everyone deserves to be loved for who they are, not who they could be.


21



Never take friendships for granted. Show up. Reach out. Be there when they need you. Friends are gifts; tend to those relationships with love.


15, 20



“The flower does not dream of the bee. It blossoms


15



ADHD hack for studying or projects- Leave yourself notes about where you left off.


13, 21



Live a life of dignity and joy.


14, 21



Shampoo their hair. Nice luxurious shampoo. It’s a treat. In “5 Love Languages” speak, its an act of service and physical touch.


5, 7, 9, 12



On grief: CS Lewis said somewhere that it isn’t just that his friend died, it’s that the part of him that only his friend could bring out would never be brought out again.


17, 21



None of us sit high enough to look down on anybody.


11, 14, 17, 21



Remember to $@!#% the switch when you’re stuck: If you’re all up in your head, sad or anxious, do something physical. If you’re down with a physical problem, dive into your mind for diversion and healing.


11,14, 17, 21



Sojourner Truth's "Ain't I a Woman" speech.


10



Honesty without kindness is brutality. Kindness without honesty is manipulation. (That said, when anyone asks if that outfit makes them look fat, the answer is “you look perfect.”)


20