“Bullies are scared people hiding inside scary people.” -Michelle Obama


8-12



For parties, collect cell phones and put them in a basket. "Parent calls only. Enjoy the people here! They're pretty awesome!"


12



Read “Spare” by Prince Harry.


20



Read “Attack of the Black Rectangles” by Amy Sarid King.


12



Institute a “leave by” time instead of a curfew. That way they won’t panic / speed if something out of their control happens to make them late. “Leave Riley’s house by 10pm.”


13



When you feel like you’re on fire with anger or fear, if you can’t shake it, put that fire to good use.


14



Isometrics for “punishment” (wall sits, arm lifts, planks, etc.)


5



True masculinity is vulnerable, compassionate and confident. Vulnerability takes courage. Kindness/compassion takes strength. Confidence: when you’re not really interested in what others think about you. It’s a natural byproduct of living in line with your own values and priorities.


11, 14, 16, 19, 21



Always clean from clean to dirty. Wash glassware first, greasy dishes last. Sink and tub first, then toilet. Then floor. Top-to bottom is another general rule.


13, 18



Highly recommend book about math and multiplication techniques:“The Best of Times” by Greg Tang.


10



Sometimes we’re just not ready to appreciate or understand a book or film or piece of art. Revisit them as you age.


19, 21



change the wifi password often. Hold it hostage until chores are done. Work first, play later.


9-14



Typically, brains aren’t mature until about age 25. ADHD brains take longer


17, 21



I would rather deal with a big truth than a little lie. Whatever it is you’re going through we can solve it together but only if we’re both honest.


14



“When happy, be kind. When sad, be kind. When ever…be kind.” - Cory Booker


9, 12, 15, 19, 21



Intimacy is a feeling of safety. To let yourself be seen, touched, known, without defenses.


17, 21



People want to be heard. Listen to your clients, even when they're upset. Don't make excuses or anything, just let them talk. They mostly just want to be heard. Once they're calm, you can solve the problem.


21



Micro-internships. Check out Parker Dewey for ideas.


16, 17, 18



Give baby a banana before bed and they’ll sleep through the night. (Obviously once they’re on solid food.)


1



Be willing to say “I don’t know” if you don’t know! Don’t just make stuff up.


15, 20



The Golden Rule is wrong. At least when it comes to relationships and especially when it comes to parenting. Instead of treating someone how you’d want to be treated, treat them how THEY’D want to be treated.__ Learn what THEY need to feel safe and loved, how THEY express big feelings like fear, anxiety, anger and frustration.___ Instead of assuming the friend/partner/child /coworker wants to be treated how you’d want to be, take the time to learn about them. Then when someone you love is in distress you can respond to them in the way they need. ___(Lesson learned from reading The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman. Great book. A little preachy but push past that. )


1, 13, 19



When you begin dating it’s all butterflies and moonbeams. Eventually you’re going to do or say something that hurts the other person and vice versa. For that matter, eventually you’ll disagree about something. It’s VERY important to consider how they handle it. Nobody is perfect, it may not be pretty but it had better be civil. If not, don’t think for a second that they will change. Get outta there.


15, 21



Make a pound of ground beef go further by adding chopped cabbage or mushrooms.


19



Any thought about self-harm is like a “check engine” light going off for your brain. Seek professional help. You will recover.


12, 14, 15, 17, 19, 21



Adopting a “do it right now” mentality has done wonders for my organization


10, 12, 16



You’ll be finished with school soon. The most important thing I hope you learned is that there is still so much yet to learn.


21



Fact: when you drink to excess you are significantly more likely to cause harm to someone or be harmed yourself. Being drunk means surrendering your ability to keep yourself and others safe.


12, 15, 18



Marry for character, not just chemistry.


17, 21



Sometimes it’s easier to describe what a thing is *not* than to describe what it is.


14, 21



You should feel safe with friends. They shouldn’t try to get you hurt or in trouble. Anyone who makes you feel unsafe is not your friend.


8-15