I’ve been trying to retrain my brain to deal with anxiety in healthy ways. It’s SO hard when these connections were fused decades ago. BUT I REFUSE to be a party to YOU laying down those same unhealthy neurological pathways. I’ll teach you better ways to handle stress and anxiety. Exercise/ Music/ warm showers/ creativity/ rest/ journaling/ meditation... WHATEVER! I promise to Somehow teach you what I never learned.


5-10, 14



There’s one thing I’ve noticed that makes the difference between an adult and someone who is over 18: That person’s proclivity for reading. Books make you smarter, yes but they also make you kinder, funnier, more empathetic and more tolerant of opposing viewpoints. Travel has a similar effect but is a lot more expensive! If you want to be a genuine grownup, read (or listen to) everything you can get your hands on.


10, 14, 16, 20



Typically, brains aren’t mature until about age 25. ADHD brains take longer


17, 21



Have dinner guests sign the under side of the dining room table. Let the kids’ friends sign too - or have their own version of a guestbook - the inside of a cabinet or the basement door, etc.


5, 12-14



Just focus on shining on your own terms. Your shine is not dependent on anyone or anything else.


15



Sweetheart you don’t have room in your life for people who don’t get you. Let your light shine…and f*@k anyone who doesn’t appreciate it.


14, 16, 18, 20



Go for walks together as a family before or after dinner. Sometimes we go for distance, sometimes we call them "safaris" and look for as many living creatures as we can find.


4



Put your purse, (wallet,bag, phone, or shoe) in the backseat with the baby. Unattended babies die every day and it’s my worst nightmare.


Infant-3, 21



Begin again. Whether by choice or necessity, sometimes there’s no other option.


15, 21



Purchase the card game CBT 123 on Amazon. (Cognitive Behavior Therapy teaches kids the connection between Thoughts/ feelings/ behavior)


7



Use Shutterfly or something like it to make Christmas books and birthday books each year.


Infant-21



They’re not rejecting you, they’re just becoming who they are. Give them some space.


12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17



I’m cool with “C”s. Do good work but don’t put too much pressure yourself.


14



Keep a pair of nail clippers in the car - much better lighting outside. Clipping tiny fingernails is terrifying!


Infant-1



1

Shampoo their hair. Nice luxurious shampoo. It’s a treat. In “5 Love Languages” speak, its an act of service and physical touch.


5, 7, 9, 12



Be mindful of avoiding the “race to nowhere.” No sense in stressing over school and work. We get one life!! LIVE it! Work hard at what you love. There will be seasons of busting your butt, and that’s good. Just make sure it’s in pursuit of something you’re passionate about. And I hope you take seasons of rest, too. Time to recharge, reflect and decide what’s next for you.


14, 16, 18, 21



None of us sit high enough to look down on anybody.


11, 14, 17, 21



Kids make fun, it’s not nice but they just do. Just blow it off if kids make fun of you got something silly. They’ll drop it if they don’t get a ride out of you. ... But bullying is different. If kids are being mean, threatening or scary, tell me and your teacher.


7



Be protective, never be possessive. watch out for your friends’ well-being, their good names, that’s what friends do. But friends don’t try to manipulate someone’s feelings, thoughts or actions.Same goes for romantic relationships.


10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 18, 21



Play to win but play fair. Be a gracious winner. Someone has to lose. Sometimes it will be you. Don’t whine.


10



Never say anything behind someone's back that you wouldn't say to their face.


11, 14, 18



Major regret: focusing too much on being liked (or loved.) You can’t *make* anyone love you. Some people just won’t like you… that’s okay. Make yourself proud. Do YOUR thing. Spend time on what matters to you.


14, 21



Keep stuff on hand for guests. Be ready to be a good host / hostess at any moment.


16-21



1

You are 100% replaceable at work. You are not replaceable at home. A good work ethic is crucial but don’t drain yourself to the point that you don’t have anything left for your family and friends.


21



Adopting a “do it right now” mentality has done wonders for my organization


10, 12, 16



Plants eat sunlight. Eat mostly plants.


14, 17, 21



Never trust your tongue when your heart is bitter. Hush until you heal.


12, 18



IMPORTANT: If you borrow money from someone pay it back as soon as possible. In full. If you borrow an item, return it in excellent condition. I’d say if you borrow a car, return it with a full tank of gas but hopefully by the time you’re driving there won’t be any combustible engines. So return it fully charged!


12, 14, 16, 21



Explain what “On my honor” means.


8



Educate About Risks of Driving


12-15