To paraphrase Chris Rock, “You don’t get points for NOT beating your wife.” Meaning, you’re EXPECTED to do the right thing. So do the right thing, without any expectation of praise.
14, 18
Talk about “don’t judge a book by its cover.” People come in all shapes, sizes, appearances. “Clean cut” is an outdated and misleading notion. Be open to who people are on the inside, they’re pretty amazing if you give the a chance.
9
You think you’re smart now but just wait. Your brain is just getting warmed up. Feed it: books, travel, music, mushrooms.
14, 17, 21
Have a yearly “review” right before school year. Raise allowance as appropriate. If they want more money, they’ll have to take on more responsibilities.
7-17
Pedestrians get hit all the time. Be aware when you’re driving OR walking. Wear reflective gear if walking at night. Stay off your phone when driving OR walking.
15
Super good-looking people often don’t develop good people skills because they’ve been able to get by on their looks. Listen! Beauty fades. Get curious about people who don’t necessarily catch your eye right away.
16, 19, 21
I would rather deal with a big truth than a little lie. Whatever it is you’re going through we can solve it together but only if we’re both honest.
14
Be teachable. If you walk around thinking you know it all, your career and relationships will suffer. Consider how much you have to learn and welcome any opportunity to learn. “Teach me” instead of “I don’t know.”
16
My mom used to proudly describe herself as an “Irish Catholic Democrat.” I think my dad voted for Reagan once but other than that we’re all pretty liberal.
18
Some men think if they just act like a total $@!#% then people will assume they’re uber intelligent. Just because someone is scary it doesn’t mean he’s scary smart.
15, 21
Ask them “what would it take for you to_____?” (Keep your room clean, stay on top of your homework, feel like you had more control in this situation, etc.) Instead of nagging or lecturing, just ask.
13
Set up a dog agility course in the backyard. Use household items or toys, etc and lots of dog treats for training.
8
If you have to pretend to be someone else to get or keep a relationship or job, etc. then that relationship/job is not for you!
15, 17, 21
Figure out a way to teach the concept of zero-sum game vs. how giving and sharing actually compounds love and goodness. Someone else getting a fair shake, or attention from someone you like, or well-earned rewards or recognition does not take away from us. Celebrate those victories and encourage others to reach for more instead of jealously guarding what you have.
8-12
Grandpa never wore a watch. (This was way before cell phones existed.) Still, he always knew what time it was, and he was never, ever late.
14
“Don’t ever let anyone tell you what you see with your own eyes isn’t happening.” -English teacher Read Diary of Anne Frank together.
12
On marriage: Your spouse will change. You will change. Some for the better, some parts for the worse. Tastes, plans, health, body shape, education, needs, beliefs... all change throughout our lives. It’s growth. (It’s also decay!) Support each other through both. Encourage each other to be true to yourselves. Don’t sweat the small stuff. Be kind. Pray for each other. Have fun together. Keep learning about each other. Be your partner’s biggest fan.
21
College: you’re gonna do great! You’re also probably gonna want to quit at some point during your first year. Totally normal. If you decide college isn’t for you or now isn’t the right time, okay. But give it a year if you can. You’ll thank yourself later.
17
make your own latch board / "busy board" for plenty of hours of learning and entertainment. Find lots of great ideas on Pinterest.
1-2
When you’re older, remember that stuff like video games, alcohol, junk food, gambling, porn, and a whole host of other vices can turn on you, and become an addiction that wrecks your health, relationships or even your life. You don’t have to give up all this stuff, but keep them to a minimum. How often and how much is a big difference. It’s the difference between meeting a friend for a beer or two and walking into work hungover most days. Remember: You decide- How often and how much.
13, 16, 19