There IS such a thing as coming on too strong. Err on the side of leaving them wanting more.


15, 18, 21



When dropping them off at a dorm, leave them with. Cookie sheet and cookie dough. Make cookies/make friends.


15, 17, 18, 19, 21



You will come to rely on whatever you choose to help you feel better. You may even become addicted. So choose carefully. Rely on creative, positive, spirit-affirming practices to replenish yourself. Don’t fall in to the trap of alcohol/ food/gambling/smoking/sex/shopping, etc. to numb your pain or avoid dealing with difficulties. ________EVERYONE feels stress, anxiety, loss, despair, frustration and a while bunch of crappy feelings at some time or another. It’s okay to feel those things. But how you choose to DEAL with those feelings will determine a great deal in how happy your life will be.


12, 14, 16, 17, 21



***Manners!! *** Etiquette is the secret sauce. Everyone appreciates being treated with respect. Etiquette is the art and science of respecting others. It’s timeless and universal. Customs change, hence the need for constant study, but respect is always the foundation. In summary: Be nice. Start with yourself. Study etiquette. It will help you in every single interaction you have, social, professional, financial, everything. Manners apply to every human, in every interaction, even on the hard days. Hence, the need for practice.


3, 5, 7, 10, 11, 15, 17, 19, 21



Be mindful of avoiding the “race to nowhere.” No sense in stressing over school and work. We get one life!! LIVE it! Work hard at what you love. There will be seasons of busting your butt, and that’s good. Just make sure it’s in pursuit of something you’re passionate about. And I hope you take seasons of rest, too. Time to recharge, reflect and decide what’s next for you.


14, 16, 18, 21



Get up early on a Saturday and go downtown. See how fun it is to be up before the rest of the world.


7-9



You were THREE years old when you caught sight of a half-dressed beautiful woman. You didn’t have much of a vocabulary yet but when your eyes got wide and you said “BAM BAM” I knew exactly what you meant. (Woman was Jessica Biel in an Adam Sandler movie.)


14, 21



Everyone has times when they don’t get their way. They lose, or fall short in competition. Everyone fails. Very few are able to fail gracefully, keeping conscious of their their dignity, not losing their sense of humor, etc. Cultivate a resilient mindset. Sometimes if you can’t beat them it really is a good thing to join them. Sometimes it’s better to go down swinging. As far as enduring a bad situation, the saying goes “If you can’t get out of it, then get into it.” Meaning, make the absolute best of it. Excel, delight in your circumstances as much as possible. You won’t stay down for long.


10, 11, 13, 15, 18, 21



Just because I forgive you, it doesn’t mean I trust you. Trust has to be earned.


15, 18, 21



Remind them they’re safe to feel whatever they’re feeling.


2, 12, 21



Marry for character, not just chemistry.


17, 21



Sometimes there’s nothing you can say or do to help someone feel better. In times like that, just make sure you don’t make it worse.


14, 18, 21



Pedestrians get hit all the time. Be aware when you’re driving OR walking. Wear reflective gear if walking at night. Stay off your phone when driving OR walking.


15



Get really clear about what you want so that you’ll be able to recognize it when it’s here. Get really clear on the kind of relationship you want so that you can realize when it’s not with the person you’re seeing.


17, 21



Let's find little ways to practice self-control and build that muscle.


11



1

Trying to avoid the real work makes the task 100 times harder. Do the work.


9, 15, 21



Just because someone is an a-hole it doesn’t mean they’re wrong.


17, 21



There is all kinds of darkness in the world- disease, accidents, natural disasters, etc. But the worst darknesses are man made: War, violence, poverty, injustice, indifference. Push back against all of it as much as you can. Light will beat the darkness in the end. Fight on the side of the light. Love, truth, beauty, creativity, connection and compassion.


20



Ask him to memorize and recite William Ernest Henley poem “Invictus” as a Christmas present for me.


15



Something to remember on those days when the kids are making you nuts and you’re at the end of your parenting rope: “They love you no matter what. They always want to be close to you. Even when you’re screwing up, they still think you’re amazing. They want to be just like you when they grow up. You are their hero. You may be their mom, but they’re constantly reminding you of your worth.”


2



Check out Long Lake Summer Camp in NY. Theater, the arts, etc.


12, 13, 14, 15, 16



Slow down and normalize making out without it leading to anything more. Physical intimacy can mean lots of things that aren’t sex: kissing should feel safe, personal and playful. ALWAYS be respectful and never assume that just because your sweetie is into it that they want to go farther. If your goal is to “score” do it by yourself.


15, 21



Cotillion and other social clubs abound in our area. They usually start around 5th or 6th grade. start looking into what might be a good fit. Lay the ground work that they will attend.


1Infant-12



Sailing lessons.


14



My biggest mistake was thinking that my life had to follow a singular path: college, marriage, kids, stay at home mom. I never imagined any other path: career, travel. I never questioned my assumptions. Never doubted that my way was the only path to happiness. It wouldn’t have occurred to my parents to teach me anything else, to encourage me to imagine a hundred different choices. But I’d like to encourage you. Take your talents, interests, passion, and potential out for a spin. See what sits right with you, where you feel most alive and most safe and most yourself. Feed your body, mind, heart and soul. I love you so much.


18, 21



You’re someone’s cup of tea. I don’t mean there is only one person out there for you, I mean someone is waiting to love you exactly how you are. Stop wasting time with fools who want to change you to fit their ideal.


15, 19, 21



You have yet to meet so many parts of yourself. All kinds of different people, places and experiences will draw those parts out of you.


15, 18, 21



Let’s talk about how we can bless people - with what we have and by how we act.


7



Watch the news together. Local and national. Today Show has both of mornings are easier than evenings.


12, 13, 14, 15



Take out your aggression on inanimate things, never on people or animals.


9