Ask them “what would it take for you to_____?” (Keep your room clean, stay on top of your homework, feel like you had more control in this situation, etc.) Instead of nagging or lecturing, just ask.


13



When it comes to conflict- what is your part in things?


15, 21



Just love ‘em up. Be patient and kind. Be present. Listen. Play. Take care of their needs. Each one will be different and need you in different ways. That’s all, just fill them with love and security and they’ll grow up beautifully.


1-18



Go for walks together as a family before or after dinner. Sometimes we go for distance, sometimes we call them "safaris" and look for as many living creatures as we can find.


4



You should feel safe with friends. They shouldn’t try to get you hurt or in trouble. Anyone who makes you feel unsafe is not your friend.


8-15



Give books. Inscribe them. Just a line or two can turn a good book into a treasure. Great for any occasion.


17



College: you’re gonna do great! You’re also probably gonna want to quit at some point during your first year. Totally normal. If you decide college isn’t for you or now isn’t the right time, okay. But give it a year if you can. You’ll thank yourself later.


17



“The only way out is to love yourself. That’s it. That’s all.” - Valerie Bertinelli


10, 13, 17, 21



Never any point in arguing with drunks or fools.


17



Your intuition speaks in statements


17, 19, 21



Don’t worry about finding your person. Focus on finding your people.


15, 21



You an learn just about anything on Google or YouTube! Spend some time exploring together and caution about how to search safely.


9



Sometimes we outgrow relationships. It’s no one’s fault. It’s okay to move on. You’ve grown…Don’t abandon your healthier self for a relationship.


14, 16,



Practice staying calm under pressure. The pop-up game “Perfection” is a fun way.


10, 12, 15, 17, 21



Life is like the ocean: Filled with energy, beauty, scary schit, lots of interesting creatures and so much to be in awe of. We couldn’t possibly control it but we can be a part of it.


16



Just focus on shining on your own terms. Your shine is not dependent on anyone or anything else.


15



Alka-Seltzer is great for a hangover or even better, take it before you go to bed after partying. Disclaimer I’m talking about a few drinks. For the love of everything holy, please don’t ingest insane amounts of alcohol at a time. Buzzed is fun, drunk is stupid. And dangerous. Never drive once you’ve had a drink or weed.


18



Put a few drops of tea tree oil in their shampoo bottle to keep lice at bay. If there’s a outbreak at school, add more. (Or spritz their hair with a tea tree oil solution.)


5-7



Your spouse will be absolutely unbearable roughly 10% of the time. So will you be, by the way. Give grace. Receive it too. Also, physical distance helps, even for a few hours.


21



Let’s talk about how we can bless people - with what we have and by how we act.


7



Sometimes you can be so angry you don’t know what to do with yourself. It’s like being forced to keep your hand on a hot stove, trying to get through one minute at a time, one even one breath at a time. But there’s no need to white-knuckle it. The rage you feel is demanding to be acknowledged and validated. It needs to be processed, not ignored, stuffed down inside. A short list of some outlets for rage that’s begging to be heard are: art, music, physical activity, time in nature, anything creative or expressive. Baking, writing, improv, storytelling, stand up. Maybe try challenging yourself to do something difficult, something doable but you would have never thought you could do, like run a marathon, etc. Literally talk to the rage. Name it. Is it male or female? Young or old? Is it human or animal or alien, etc? Giving Rage a name, say for example Helen. Helen is a straight-up terrifying 8th grader. She has a few things she’d like to unload about. Dialog it in your head. And when you’ve heard her out, Helen will leave peacefully, if not painlessly. What do you do with yourself when the rage is gone? Give yourself permission to start over. Always remember I love you. xoxo


14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 21



Visit Aunt Janet in Morehead City for Seafood Festival in October


2-99



Action is the antithesis of anxiety.


18



It’s your civic duty to vote (including midterms!) Be an informed voter.


16, 18



Name a few male celebrities you would feel safe with alone in a room. Keanu Reeves, Jack Black, Barack Obama, to start us off.


11, 13, 15



YouTube Hank Green “Study Hall.” It talks about navigating the mess of college and career choices, like choosing a major (and what a major is!) What interests align with which majors, etc.


12, 15, 16



Never make someone feel bad for liking something. Not your kids, your friends or colleagues. Joy is a beautiful thing. Cherish it in yourself and in others.


8, 9, 12



Test


20



Resentment is a sign you are giving too much and are in need of replenishment. It’s a good example of how even the “negative” emotions are on your side, interpreting your experience in the world.


16, 18, 21