Go as a family to local high school musical productions.


7-18



Gambling is designed to be seductive- Everything about casinos and online gambling sites is about getting you to hand over your cash. It’s a scam. Don’t fall for it!


15, 18



Sometimes hookups don’t go well. The vibe is off for whatever reason. Stop. It’s okay to say “actually, let’s just call it a night.” Trust your gut. Be kind but never apologize for saying no-thanks.


15, 20



Anything you wear on purpose is fashion.


14, 19, 21



Set up a 529 plan. Virginia has a great plan if you don't want to do too much research https://www.savingforcollege.com/


birth-age 3



When you meet someone for the first time try to clear your mind of any assumptions about physical appearance. Race, gender, age, handicap/disability, etc.


17, 21



Institute a “leave by” time instead of a curfew. That way they won’t panic / speed if something out of their control happens to make them late. “Leave Riley’s house by 10pm.”


13



You’re going to be okay if your relationship ends. You were a whole person before them and you’ll be a whole person after. - therapy Jeff


15, 21



Remember that your tend to act like/ think like the people you hang around most. Choose your friends (and your spouse) wisely.


10, 14, 21



It’s possible (even common) to feel conflicting emotions simultaneously. You can be glad you’re not with a girl and still be jealous if she finds a new love. You can be glad you’ve moved on and still miss what once was. You can be sad that something happened and grateful for something that came of it. Humans are complex. Two or more conflicting thoughts can exist in our heads at once. It’s not a betrayal or a character flaw.


17



A friend of mine lost her son in a horrible accident. She wrote “I don’t believe God caused this but I do believe he can redeem it.” That has stayed with me for years. God doesn’t cause suffering... He showers those who suffer with his grace.


18



Talk about “don’t judge a book by its cover.” People come in all shapes, sizes, appearances. “Clean cut” is an outdated and misleading notion. Be open to who people are on the inside, they’re pretty amazing if you give the a chance.


9



Read up on the adolescent brain.


11, 13



“You don’t emerge from $@!#% empty-handed” a friend once told me. Even the worst periods of your life will bring gifts. Be thankful for those gifts, and enjoy them.


19



Dating advice: If they like you, you’re gonna know. If they don’t, you’re gonna be confused.”


16, 21



Let decency be like a religion to you. Practice it …but don’t preach it.


14



I did my best to guide you, but I’m sure there are many areas where my take is just not aligned with yours. That’s okay! Bunny please don’t feel any obligation to believe what I believe or take any advice, or continue any tradition mentioned in this Coda.


21



Kindness + Confidence = secret to success and “popularity.”


10, 12, 13, 14, 15, 17, 18, 21



Look into Kano (make your own computer)


7-11



Listen to records, a whole album at a time. 2 or 3 in a row. Bring friends, eat, drink, hangout, be goofy, dance, etc.


14-18



Roll-play confrontational situations so they can practice staying calm, not reacting in situations like road-rage, bullies, being screamed at by a boss or a customer.


11, 15, 17



"You think your pain and your heartbreak are unprecedented in the history of the world, but then you read." ~ James Baldwin


14, 19



Walk up the Washington monument. No elevator!


11



Focus on the lesson not the pain.


14, 21



Open a Bank Account


8-12



Ask them to think of foods that taste good and also foods that make them feel good. Involve them in lunchbox decisions, dinner planning and prep, etc. so they’re empowered by their food habits.


6-9



Watch the western “1883”.


13



You are 100% replaceable at work. You are not replaceable at home. A good work ethic is crucial but don’t drain yourself to the point that you don’t have anything left for your family and friends.


21



It matters more “how” you go to college than “where” you go to college.


16



Read “Attack of the Black Rectangles” by Amy Sarid King.


12