Make a deal: flying lessons IF he takes dancing lessons. A man has got to know how to dance! In fact, tack on some other prerequisites like good grades and responsible behavior


16



“The beginning parts are always the scariest.” -Jackson Daily (kid reporter on Today Show.)


10, 12, 16



Listen to the radio stations they listen to. Know their favorite songs and artists.


12



Don’t have a clue? (Relationships / career / character, etc.) The solutions can be found in books. READ! Novels, biographies, history, religion, humor, politics, finance, sports, and whatever sparks your interests at the moment!) You’ll learn about the world, and you’ll learn about yourself. READ!!!! (or listen!)


12, 15, 18, 20



“A lot” is two words. (You wouldn’t write abunch as one word.) “Its” is a pronoun like his or hers (you wouldn’t write her’s) The contraction “it’s” ONLY means “it is.” They’re / there / their


10



It’s so tempting to write someone off, to dismiss them as “less than.” They’re too young or too old to be taken seriously. They speak a different language or have a different skin color. They may be poor, uneducated, disabled or just simply unattractive. RESIST that temptation. Remember that every human being is God’s creation, a masterpiece cloaked in dignity. No matter what they look like or even what they’ve done, everyone you meet is deserving (and in need) of respect. To be humble is to remember this. (Start lesson young, phrased age-appropriately, and reticket yearly. Look for opportunities to discuss.)


8, 10, 11, 12, 16, 21



My Nana, born around 1913, used to decry “some people think the world owes them a living.” A hundred years later I agree. Nothing worse than entitlement.


13, 15, 21



Sex isn’t something you “score.” It’s not a competition. Whether the encounter is casual or within a committed relationship it’s something that is shared.


16, 19, 20



Ask “What are you going to teach ME?” Let him work on something to teach.


11



Pay attention to what people do and what they say. Try to look past their appearance. This is especially true for women, who are almost always judged primarily on the way they look.


12, 15, 19



Work the problem backwards. Start with the solution (desired outcome) and count down from there each step. Some steps will be small, some big. But you’ll get there!


13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18



Spend time with people you admire, in person and biographies, documentaries, novels and movies.


14-17, 21



Grandpa always said everything boils down to how you treat people. Always treating people with kindness and respect is the most important lesson he wanted to get across to us.


12-21



Sometimes procrastination is part of the process. Eventually though, doing the thing is easier than stressing over it or hiding from it.


10. 12, 15, 21



Have family game nights this winter.


9



I love the quote “The call towards authenticity is sacred” by Paula S. Williams I think it means that a few things: Being called. We are called by something higher to grow and stretch, to evolve. That evolution is a journey that should be undertaken with humility, compassion and love. To impede one’s quest to be authentic, be it our own or another’s, is a grave injustice and should be avoided at all cost.


13-17, 21



One regret I have is how sure I was that I was in the right. Looking back I can see now that there were plenty of times when I was the a-hole. I wish I had been able to be circumspect.


14, 17, 21



Don’t offer them advice until you ask questions: What does a good outcome here look like for you? How much energy are you willing to put into this? Do you feel like you’re being asked to sacrifice a part of who you are if you do this? Is the fear you’re feeling maybe just that initial reaction we all get when something is new and unfamiliar? Stuff like that. Mostly they just need help understanding themselves and encouragement to stay true to themselves.


4, 7, 12, 15, 18, 21



Start a yearly “review” right before school year. Raise allowance as appropriate. If they want more money, they’ll have to take on more responsibilities.


8



Keep going. Push yourself. The struggle makes it all the more worth it.


17, 21



Sometimes grief looks a lot like anger. Are you upset about something you lost or had to let go of?


15, 21



Educate yourself. You can't solve a problem if you don't understand it.


14-21



Motivation: Just start. Two minutes. You don’t need to feel good to get going, you need to get going to give yourself a chance to feel good.


16



“We don’t see the world as it is, we see the world as we are. - Prince Harry Or to put it simply, wherever you go, there you are.


12, 15, 21



Stop before you descend too far into the pain. Let yourself be loved. Rest. Eat. Shower. Breath. Sweat. Sing.


10, 11, 12, 14, 16, 19, 21



Sometimes I think the best way to take care of them is to teach them to take care of others: Littler kids, sick or disabled, those who’ve been left out.


5-7, 1Infant-12



When someone introduces themselves as transgender, it’s no big deal. Simply say “nice to meet you” or “cool.” Then politely ask “What are your pronouns?” And then you know how they prefer to be addressed.


13



Practice making yourself do something you don’t feel like doing. Practice and it gets easier


10, 12, 15, 18, 21



Sometimes fear feels like a signal to get out of there, but being uncomfortable in a new situation is totally normal. Practice sitting in that discomfort and you’ll find it gets easier.


9, 12, 15, 17, 21



People always say “Be yourself.” That’s good advice but really what does it mean? I think it’s easier to explain what it DOESN’T mean: When you’re being yourself you’re not pretending to be interested in something or someone you’re not. You’re not doing something just to please someone else (or just to tick them off.) You’re not wearing anything that makes you feel uncomfortable. You’re not pretending to have fun when you’re not having fun. You’re not trying to impress anyone. You’re not trying to fade into the background. You’re not trying to change anything about yourself or someone else. I think that’s a good start. What does “being yourself” mean to you?


11-14, 18, 21