Read the instructions. Don't ask for help if you've been given instructions but haven't yet read them. RTFM. (Read the flippin' manual.)


14-21



Birthday traditions: 1) Plant something every year. 2) Birthday interview on camera or voice recording.


5



Don’t use a bad word when you can use a good word.


10



Yes, push yourself and see how far / fast / high you can go (physically, academically, etc.) But remember, you have nothing to prove to anyone except yourself.


14, 17, 21



Wintergreen snow sledding trip.


6



Sex isn’t something you “score.” It’s not a competition. Whether the encounter is casual or within a committed relationship it’s something that is shared.


16, 19, 20



Uplift your friends and surround yourself with friends who uplift you. In person and online. Encourage each other to let your lights shine brightly. Never bully or steal someone’s joy.


11, 15, 18, 20



When you’re at home in your own skin you invite people to be at home in theirs too.


14, 20



Action is the antidote to anxiety.


12, 14, 17, 21



Spend time with people you admire. Real-life acquaintances, biographies and documentaries, and fictional characters in novels, plays and movies.


13, 15, 18, 21



Work on controlling temper. Read books about how to reach this at a young age and keep updating the conversation as he grows. He needs to be able to control his temper.


4-7



To paraphrase Ted Lasso, it’s the people who think they’ve got it all figured out who delight in judging people and events. It’s better to be open minded, ask questions. Be curious, not judgmental.


15, 21



Purchase book "All Are Welcome" by Alexandra Penfold to prep him for kindergarten.


5



Don’t take criticism from people you wouldn’t take advice from.


16



“Pick a problem - any problem,and do something about it. Because to somebody who is hurting, ‘something’ is everything.” -Oprah Winfrey


12-16



Slow down and normalize making out without it leading to anything more. Physical intimacy can mean lots of things that aren’t sex: kissing should feel safe, personal and playful. ALWAYS be respectful and never assume that just because your sweetie is into it that they want to go farther. If your goal is to “score” do it by yourself.


15, 21



Respect people’s privacy. No snooping, eavesdropping, peeping, etc.


11



Let's find little ways to practice self-control and build that muscle.


11



Be the kind of man that people feel safe around. Safe from harm, safe from judgment and safe from ridicule.


17



Whatever your first knee-jerk reaction is, it’s not always the right one. Sleep on it.


14, 17, 21



You never know what people are going through. Depression, PTSD, anxiety could look like avoidance, anger, risk-taking, promiscuity, etc. Look out for friends, coworkers and loved ones who may be in pain. You don’t need to solve their problem, just allow for the possibility that they’re going through something. Try to give them the benefit of the doubt and not write off “bad” behavior as a character flaw. Offer a non-judgmental ear.


15, 20



Send them outside with an age-appropriate pair of scissors and have them “give the grass a haircut.” Fine motor skills!


2-4



Major life events such as the birth of a baby, graduations, new job, (lost job) are a big deal. Make a fuss. Take an interest in loved ones’ experiences. Acknowledge their feelings. Express a sincere interest in others (young and old) will profoundly affect your relationships.


15, 19



If it’s the right thing, if something needs to be done… Make yourself do it. You’re never going to “feel like it.” Practice daily with things big and / or small without complaining.


9, 12, 15, 21



Let’s find an activity where you can work with your hands


11



“Abhor what is evil. Hold fast to what is good.”


10, 12, 14, 16, 18, 21



Whether it’s a kid at school or a politician on tv, beware of someone who tries to blame the world’s problems on a minority or some other group of people who are different. It’s a cheap tactic to get people riled up and afraid.


13



No one knows what they’re doing. Just be kind and brave and curious. You don’t have to have it figured out.


17



A simple trick to calm your nerves: Name 5 things you can hear right now.


5-15



1