Always stand up to shake someone’s hand. (NEVER shake a person’s hand while sitting.)
Always get up out of your seat to greet a guest and walk them to the door when they leave.
Sometimes when you win, you lose. And when you lose, you win. Meaning that sometimes when you get what you want it doesn’t work out well. And sometimes wonderful things happen as a result of a failure or disappointment.
Chin up. There’s a million paths to happiness and fulfillment. If one doesn’t work out your will find another.
You are always responsible for how you act, no matter what you’re feeling. (Or whether you’re drunk or in any way impaired.)
Hammer this point home for the next 10 years!
You were THREE years old when you caught sight of a half-dressed beautiful woman. You didn’t have much of a vocabulary yet but when your eyes got wide and you said “BAM BAM” I knew exactly what you meant. (Woman was Jessica Biel in an Adam Sandler movie.)
Marriage vows won’t “fix” anything about a relationship. They won’t change how a person communicates. Never start out a relationship with the hope or expectation that your partner will change (or if they are hoping you will change.)It’s not fair to either of you. Everyone deserves to be loved for who they are, not who they could be.
Instead of focusing on finding love, focus on DOING what you love. When you're thriving and in your element Love will find YOU.
Besides, love isn't just about finding the right person it's about being the right person.
On marriage: Your spouse will change. You will change. Some for the better, some parts for the worse.
Tastes, plans, health, body shape, education, needs, beliefs... all change throughout our lives. It’s growth. (It’s also decay!)
Support each other through both.
Encourage each other to be true to yourselves. Don’t sweat the small stuff. Be kind. Pray for each other. Have fun together. Keep learning about each other. Be your partner’s biggest fan.
Work towards your goal. If you screw-up, fix it. The worst thing you could do is give up just because you made a mistake. Nobody’s perfect. Keep going!
I want to talk about when NOT to join in. Friends are great and feeling like we belong feels so good. But there are times I hope you muster the courage not to go along: Never cause anyone or anything pain in order to be liked. Don't confuse cruelty for humor. Never participate in things that may cause harm to yourself or others.
Can you think of some things you want to make sure you don't go along with?
Major life events such as the birth of a baby, graduations, new job, (lost job) are a big deal. Make a fuss. Take an interest in loved ones’ experiences. Acknowledge their feelings. Express a sincere interest in others (young and old) will profoundly affect your relationships.
“Where you stand depends on where you sit.” It means your personal situation informs your stance on issues. Try to imagine how you’d vote if you were sitting at a less privileged place.
Sometimes the job will require you to do menial tasks. Do them enthusiastically because nothing is “beneath you.” If the good Lord can wash people’s feet, you can make coffee at the office. Get over yourself.
Third or fourth grade is usually a time of friendship drama. Hurt feelings abound. Treat yourself and them gently. Hold space for sadness and frustration. The last thing we ever want to do is to change who we are (what we like) in order to fit in. Good friends encourage you to let your light shine, they don’t mock your light, or imply you should dim it. I don’t care who’s popular, good looking etc, beware of anyone who thinks mean is cool. Gravitate towards kind, weird, talented, interesting, funny, etc. Good vibes are always better than “cool.”
Honesty without kindness is brutality. Kindness without honesty is manipulation. (That said, when anyone asks if that outfit makes them look fat, the answer is “you look perfect.”)
Institute a “leave by” time instead of a curfew. That way they won’t panic / speed if something out of their control happens to make them late. “Leave Riley’s house by 10pm.”