Save where you can. Spend when you have to. Splurge every once in a while.


15, 21



"You think your pain and your heartbreak are unprecedented in the history of the world, but then you read." ~ James Baldwin


14, 19



When COVID started my first thought was “Holy sh*t Trump is going to cancel the 2020 election because of pandemic.” Thank God I was wrong.


15



You have yet to meet so many parts of yourself. All kinds of different people, places and experiences will draw those parts out of you.


15, 18, 21



I hope you become more of yourself with every passing year. I love you so.


21



Never allow anyone to tell you who you are.


17



Remember to $@!#% the switch when you’re stuck: If you’re all up in your head, sad or anxious, do something physical. If you’re down with a physical problem, dive into your mind for diversion and healing.


11,14, 17, 21



Encourage creativity, science and engineering: Make a craft station / work bench for projects. Fill it with all kinds of art supplies, engineering kits, tools, pegboard, etc. Stock safety equipment like goggles and make sure the area has good lighting. Lots of ideas on Pinterest, etc.


8



Read books. Any kind. All kinds. It’s exercise for the brain and it feeds the soul. Start slow, that’s ok. As with many things, consistency beats speed.


6, 10, 13, 16, 17, 19, 20, 21



Book: “victory. Stand!” By Tommie Smith


14



Kids (and people of all ages) need attention, affection and appreciation. It’s not all they need, but it’s a start!


11



Talk about how to act respectfully and be inclusive of children with disabilities and facial deformities, etc.


5-10



At dinner time, go around the table and share your “highs and lows” for the day. (Re-ticket up to 21)


5



Be the kind of man that people feel safe around. Safe from harm, safe from judgment and safe from ridicule.


17



Listen to Celebrate Calm podcasts for help dealing with defiance.


4, 9, 15



Sojourner Truth's "Ain't I a Woman" speech.


10



Use Shutterfly or something like it to make Christmas books and birthday books each year.


Infant-21



Have them sort change, and eventually to count it. It teaches them to gather things that are alike, it's an introduction to money and it occupies them for 15 minutes! Just make sure they're old enough to be past the point of putting coins in their mouth.


3-5



It’s hard to want something and not have it. Kids have to learn how to sit with that.


3-17



Be a safe place. Teach them to be a safe place too.


12



Taken from a friend’s Facebook post: You are holding a cup of coffee when someone comes along and bumps into you or shakes your arm, making you spill your coffee everywhere. Why did you spill the coffee? "Because someone bumped into me!!!" Wrong answer. You spilled the coffee because there was coffee in your cup. Had there been tea in the cup, you would have spilled tea. *Whatever is inside the cup is what will spill out.* Therefore, when life comes along and shakes you (which WILL happen), whatever is inside you will come out. It's easy to fake it, until you get rattled. *So we have to ask ourselves... “what's in my cup?"* When life gets tough, what spills over? Joy, gratefulness, peace and humility? Anger, bitterness, harsh words and reactions? Life provides the cup, YOU choose how to fill it. Today let's work towards filling our cups with gratitude, forgiveness, joy, words of affirmation


12, 17



Read Harry Potter series to him / with him.


9-10



Focus on the lesson not the pain.


14, 21



Invest in a laminator, a label maker and a glue gun. You’ll be glad you did!


5



Sometimes big stuff happens. Big good, big bad, big change. It will take some time to adjust. Maybe a month, a season, a semester or maybe a year or longer. Gear up. Psych yourself up for a difficult day/month/year. You can do this. Stay present, don’t get ahead of yourself or get bogged down in what’s done. “What if?” and “if-only’s” are not your friends. Be good to yourself and be good to others. Rest, nourish, create, have fun and keep the faith.


15, 21



Jumper cables 101


14



Sesame Street has great resources on teaching finances to little ones.


4-5



Affection is to be shared, never taken.


14



Hand out tulip bulbs (or some sort of bulbs) at my funeral and ask people to plant a few in their yard. But NOT daffodils. I hate daffodils. And lilies, hate ‘em.) So tulips then.


21



Watch Abby Wambach's 2018 Barnard commencement address together.


16