“It’s not your job to make people love you. It’s your job to show people who you are and allow them the opportunity to love you, if they want to.
If they don’t, please just let them walk away.
They were probably going to walk away anyway, they were just sticking around to see if you’d beg a little bit. Don’t even give them that.
Let them go.
You’re not a shape shifter. You’re not going to turn into the version of yourself that you think would be more lovable by the person you are trying to be loved by.
That’s not love, that’s exhausting.”
-Elyse Myers, one of my favorite Tiktokers.
You deserve to be loved for who you genuinely are.
I wish I’d read this when I was young. Would’ve saved me years of pain and frustration.
Summer Olympics for neighborhood kids. Create events in all kinds of sports, games and skills. Mix it up so the littler ones and the less athletically inclined have something they can succeed at too.
Use timers to motivate and structure. "Better have your jammies on and teeth brushed by the time the timer goes off!" Using a simple timer helps things not drag on and on.
There’s an art to speaking harsh truths in a delicate way. There’s an art in describing a ridiculous person or thing without being insulting. Mark Twain was a master at it. Read up!
Putting up the Christmas tree the weekend or next after Thanksgiving, then watching Polar Express in the glow of the lights. Maybe the smell of gingerbread cookies baking too.
If it’s the right thing, if something needs to be done…
Make yourself do it.
You’re never going to “feel like it.”
Practice daily with things big and / or small without complaining.
Taking care of your things, keeping them in good condition, putting them away, keeping them safe from harm or theft, etc. Charge your equipment, make your bed, respect your space, your clothing, your tools. Take the time to take care the things that bring you joy, the things that you need or may need. Especially things that are not yours, anything that you are entrusted with. Take good care of them. Treat them gently. Everything wants to be treated gently. xo
Lookout for the girls when you’re in a group. Some boys will try to take advantage or straight up r@pe them. Your responsibility goes beyond avoiding harming anyone. Your male privilege is a perk…earn it. Protect girls from sketchy dudes. No big deal, just help when you can and then move along. Don’t expect a cookie.
Be appreciative of people’s time. Send thank you notes after interviewing and applying for jobs, scholarships, etc. even if you don’t get picked.
It’s common courtesy and it’s a good way to make a good impression for next time.
Turn on the closed captions on tv. Reading them is almost unconscious. Even better, set the audio to a language other than English and turn on English captions.
You can’t hit ‘em all outta the park. Some days (dates, reviews, vacations, report cards, etc.) are just going to fall flat. No worries, the next one will be better.
Something to remember on those days when the kids are making you nuts and you’re at the end of your parenting rope:
“They love you no matter what.
They always want to be close to you.
Even when you’re screwing up, they still think you’re amazing.
They want to be just like you when they grow up.
You are their hero.
You may be their mom, but they’re constantly reminding you of your worth.”
Your great-great grandmother was a seamstress at Marshall Fields. Her husband was a firefighter in Chicago. The immigrated from County Wexford in Ireland.