Remember the tool of “Yes. But first...” Kids ask for things they want ALL DAY. To avoid saying”no” all day, (and avoid tantrums) don’t say no. Little One doesn’t touch her dinner except for the applesauce. Then she asks “Mommy can I have more applesauce?” Tell her “Yes!” “After you finish your meat and vegetables.”


2



Ladies, don’t waste a moment of your precious time trying to get a man’s attention. If he’s interested he will love heaven and earth to get YOUR attention. Save your energy for joy and work and learning and doing whatever floats your boat! Let him be the one to twist himself in knots.


15, 18, 20



Venting is crucial but not always appropriate. Make sure you’re in the right place (no chance whatsoever of being overheard), the right time (take care of business first) and that the person you’re unloading on has the mental bandwidth to listen to you vent your emotions. Avoid interrupting if they’re busy, or not in a good headspace. You’ll know this because you asked.


14, 17, 21



Getting your drivers license will depend not only on government requirements (age, passing tests, etc.) but also maturity and trustworthiness.


14



Sometimes our bodies can betray us. Something goes wrong and healthy cells are replaced with broken cells: Cancer, diabetes, heart disease, auto-immune diseases, etc. Mental health can become diseased too: Depression, anxiety, compulsive behavior, suicidal thoughts. The very good news is that good medical care is available for all of these things. That, along with the love and support of family and friends helps our bodies to heal. Physical illness is obvious. Sometimes people keep their mental pain a secret. Please promise me you’ll never keep any pain you’re going through a secret.


13



I wrestle with leaving the church but I want to save you a lifetime of feelings of unworthiness. It’s totally normal to feel like you’re not good enough. We all battle those kinds of insecurities, so the last thing we need is to be taught that God thinks it too. Know that in reality we are all precious, down to the subatomic level. So when you think you’re unworthy, shake it off! You belong in every room you enter.


13, 15, 21



With toddlers (or teens), first acknowledge the emotion. Then deal with the behavior. Validate their feelings. Once everyone is calm, address the behavior and discuss consequences if appropriate.


2, 13, 17



No one is ever really ready to be a parent. It’s definitely on the job training! But I’ll say this: If you’re prepared to put your family’s needs before your own, you’re as ready as anyone can be.


21



“The beginning parts are always the scariest.” -Jackson Daily (kid reporter on Today Show.)


10, 12, 16



If a girl is drunk she cannot consent. Don’t even think about hooking up when your partner is intoxicated. It’s immoral and illegal. No excuses. No exceptions. . Break this law and you will be (rightfully) charged with rape and you will get sent to prison.


15



Teach tuck to drive


15



Be kind. Be brave.


5-10



Don’t stay down too long.


16, 19, 21



“Those who cannot change their mind cannot change anything.” -George Bernard Shaw...... As you live and love and learn, your views will evolve. It takes courage to grow.


16



When they’re upset just ask what they need: space, distraction, or talk about it.


12



Have somebody take him skiing. I never learned to ski but I hope he learns to ski or snowboard.


6-11



Sponsor a child in a developing country. Write letters, learn about their country and their life.


8



Buy “Good Pictures Bad Pictures: Porn-Proofing Today’s Young Kids” by Kristen Jenson


8



Roll-play confrontational situations so they can practice staying calm, not reacting in situations like road-rage, bullies, being screamed at by a boss or a customer.


11, 15, 17



Re-Read "Girls and Sex: Navigating the New Landscape" by Peggy Orenstein.


13



When choosing a partner I think it's less important that you both "believe" the same things and more important that you VALUE the same things and share the same priorities.


20



Watch the political conventions every election year. Listen and decide for yourself.


17, 18, 21



Institute “Family Night” a screen-free night of games and fun and togetherness. Can use these times for conversations about things you want to address / teach. Maybe make theme nights and build around a lesson so it’s fun and enjoyable. Continue through school years.


4-6



Most times there isn’t a “right decision.” You make a decision and then it’s up to you to *make* it right.


12, 16, 19, 21



Be willing to say “I don’t know” if you don’t know! Don’t just make stuff up.


15, 20



All behavior is communication.


2-6



When trying to make a u-turn with a tight turning radius, go VERY slow. .You’ll be more likely to make it and if you don’t make it you won’t cause damage.)


16



Your intuition speaks in statements


17, 19, 21



“Your life unfolds in proportion to your courage.” -Danielle Le Port


15, 18



Drunken shenanigans are part of life when you’re in college, etc. but it gets old fast. That kind of behavior as an adult is just sad. Drink responsibly. Don’t make an $@!#% out of yourself. I recommend this rule: Don’t have more than one drink at a work function.


21