Failed? Lift yourself up, or live there. You know the work you need to do, be it physical, mental, emotional or spiritual, etc. So do it. Do the work. The only bitterness in failure comes from not having the guts to get back up again.


12, 16, 18, 20, 21



Go as a family to local high school musical productions.


9-13



1

Pour energy into what’s right with you and see what happens.


20, 21



Take heart. There are lots of terrible things in the world - Poverty, disease, injustice, natural disasters...Thankfully, good FAR outweighs the bad: Love, Faith, Art, friendship, healing, creativity, community, innovation, beauty and renewal to name just a few. Focus on the good. Relish in the countless expressions of goodness. Work hard to preserve, protect, and advance them.


18



Piano


21



I’m going to start you in Mathnasium or some other STEM (math) activity. Not because I want u to score high on your SAT but because I want You to be confident in your math skills you will use it every day and it will come in handy no matter what you choose to do for a living


7



“The next generation never learns anything from the previous one until it’s brought home like a hammer.” - Harry Truman


13, 16, 21



You can get into big trouble (with school and the law) even by fake / joke threats of violence (bomb threat, etc.) No jokes or pranks that have anything to do with violence.


11



Challenge yourself to excel at something. You’ll be astonished how good you can get by practicing consistently. There’s nothing magical about high school quarterbacks or drummers. Girls like boys who have something going on.


13, 14, 17



Have dinner guests sign the under side of the dining room table. Let the kids’ friends sign too - or have their own version of a guestbook - the inside of a cabinet or the basement door, etc.


5, 12-14



Getting your drivers license will depend not only on government requirements (age, passing tests, etc.) but also maturity and trustworthiness.


14



“Pain that is not transformed is transmitted.” Fr. Richard Rohr


14



Test


1-2



1

Everyone has times when they don’t get their way. They lose, or fall short in competition. Everyone fails. Very few are able to fail gracefully, keeping conscious of their their dignity, not losing their sense of humor, etc. Cultivate a resilient mindset. Sometimes if you can’t beat them it really is a good thing to join them. Sometimes it’s better to go down swinging. As far as enduring a bad situation, the saying goes “If you can’t get out of it, then get into it.” Meaning, make the absolute best of it. Excel, delight in your circumstances as much as possible. You won’t stay down for long.


10, 11, 13, 15, 18, 21



Three things you cannot change: The past, the truth, someone else.


18



Watch the news together. Local and national. Today Show has both of mornings are easier than evenings.


12, 13, 14, 15



Plan a few screen-free weekends every year. (Reticket until 16.)


7



“Pay yourself first” means save before you spend. You never know when you’ll need to tap into savings, so build it up early and heartily.


18



“When you are not fed love off a silver spoon you will learn to lick it off of knives.” Lauren Eden (poet)


0, 20



Read maps.


9-14



The opposite of depression is expression.


15



Screw “achievement.” Do things you enjoy, share experiences that expand your capacity for joy and compassion. It doesn’t matter if you’re any good, it just matters that you’re in your groove.


16, 21



“For better or worse means no matter what life throws at us, not no matter what you do to me.” - Brenda Linn


19, 21



Intimacy is a feeling of safety. To let yourself be seen, touched, known, without defenses.


17, 21



Every time your heart breaks, your vision gets better. You appreciate beauty and recognize and respond to others’ pain better.


12, 15, 18, 21



Be mindful of privilege. Discuss the concept, point it out where you see it.


11-18



1

You think you’re smart now but just wait. Your brain is just getting warmed up. Feed it: books, travel, music, mushrooms.


14, 17, 21



If they’re not doing anything dangerous, illegal or immoral, let them be. Give them space and independence. (Just first define dangerous/ illegal/ immoral. Then remind them that you are here and would love to hear about anything they want to share.)


14



Put together a PowerPoint project outlining addiction: substance, gambling, shopping, hoarding, eating, etc. Have them so the research and put it together. Discuss. Reward its completion with a fun activity or trip.


15



Behind every behavior is a need.


2, 3, 4, 13, 14