Teach them what to do if they hit an animal while driving on the road. (First find out what you’re supposed to do, THEN teach them.)


16



Let's all go on a "complaining diet." See how long we can go without a complaint for a weekend. Repeat often.


9-15



Change always brings feelings of unease. It’s easy to confuse that feeling of unease with the feeling that something must be wrong. Give yourself time to adjust before deciding if a new thing is bad..


14, 18, 21



Sometimes (oftentimes) the truth is easier to find than to face.


14, 20



Be a good guest. Never arrive to a dinner or a party empty handed. Bring a gift: flowers, food, drink, etc.


18



When they turn 18 they should have a will, a financial power of attorney and a medical PoA.


17,18



“Your goals will kick you in the shins and steal your lunch money.” -Jon Acuff. You have to fight back, even though some days you lose. Failure is part of the process. Keep going.


19



Home is where they love you.


13, 17, 21



Family trip to a NASCAR race..


6



Find one or two scary documentaries on the dangers of gambling. Watch together. Betting on sports is a big thing in some schools and I want to scare the $@!#% out of him about how bad gambling can screw up his life. Check online tools from gamblers anonymous.


15



Before heading out for a good time, make a mental note on the ways you could wreck or end your life if bad stuff happened: Sick/hurt/dead from alcohol or drugs, unintended pregnancy, or being raped (or being charged with rape.) What do u have to do to protect yourself and keep things from going from good times to life-changing nightmare. Keep your wits about ya. And look out for your friends too.


15, 17, 18, 19, 21



Never consent to a search. Ask if it’s required. If not, no search. If yes, ask for your lawyer.


17, 21



Be respectful with regard to how you treat girls:. How you talk to them, how you talk about them, and even how you think about them.


11-14



When you feel sad, mad, confused or in any way upset, go to a quiet place to catch your breath. If you can sit with it and let it tell you what it wants to tell you, then you become its friend. But if you try to deny the feeling, or numb it, it grows much stronger and it fights you.


9, 13, 19



Get talking. Trade off likes, fears, hopes, dreams, pet peeves, etc. I like... I get mad when... I dream about... It makes me sad when I see... I’m afraid of... I wonder about...


4, 8, 14



If you want people to believe you, trust you and be able to depend on you, then you must have integrity. Integrity means that you tell the truth, don’t deceive or cheat, you keep your word and you pitch in to help with little things and big things without having to be asked. Who are the people you know who have integrity? Do you want to be a man of integrity?


13, 17



Make sure they have resources other than us. Hotlines for teens such as Boys Town National Hotline, National $@!#% Prevention Lifeline, etc.


12



Sometimes hookups don’t go well. The vibe is off for whatever reason. Stop. It’s okay to say “actually, let’s just call it a night.” Trust your gut. Be kind but never apologize for saying no-thanks.


15, 20



Listen to records, a whole album at a time. 2 or 3 in a row. Bring friends, eat, drink, hangout, be goofy, dance, etc.


14-18



Be weird. Be happy. Be you. xoxo


12



If you want to know what a woman wants in a man, I have a simple answer for you: watch the movie Scent of a Woman starring Al Pacino. Specifically, the tango scene.


14, 17, 21



That uneasy, uncomfortable or even downright painful feeling you get when you’re faced with something that challenges you ... resist the urge to run away from it. Take a breath and just sit with it for a minute. That feeling you’re feeling is growth. Growth always hurts a little bit. Give yourself a beat to get adjusted before you decide if you want to stay or turn back.


7, 11, 14, 18, 21



Let them borrow your calm. Little ones (grownups too) sometimes just need to freak out a bit. Stay there. Be near. Don’t judge or even help. Just be there, and stay calm. Your loving energy is all they need as they work through it themselves. Keep them safe but other than that don’t help or advise unless they ask.


2-6, 17, 21



Never make a decision from a place of hopelessness.


14, 16, 21



When something is upsetting you...Name it...Take a deep breath...Imagine holding it gently in your hands. (This is a reminder to use this visualization myself and to teach it to you. I want to give you as many tools as I can to help you learn to cope with negative emotions in a healthy way.)


9-11



I did my best to guide you, but I’m sure there are many areas where my take is just not aligned with yours. That’s okay! Bunny please don’t feel any obligation to believe what I believe or take any advice, or continue any tradition mentioned in this Coda.


21



We’re all just so delicate. It’s just our nature. Treat others (and yourself) accordingly. Even/ especially the ones that seem to be tough as nails or sharp as wire. Try not to lose sight of that.


13, 16, 20



When you’re getting serious in a relationship here’s something to consider- To what extent is your partner is willing to put others’ needs before their own?


21



Look into language school. Now is a good time to start learning Chinese, Spanish or Arabic.


5-8



Healing doesn’t mean becoming the best version of yourself. It’s learning to love even the worst parts about yourself.


17, 21