Get really clear about what you want so that you’ll be able to recognize it when it’s here. Get really clear on the kind of relationship you want so that you can realize when it’s not with the person you’re seeing.


17, 21



Stupid is as stupid does - it’s not something you “are” it’s something you do.


4, 7, 9, 11, 13, 16, 19, 21



Be generous in all things. That is my hope for you.


14, 18, 21



1

ALWAYS pee before you sit down to nurse a baby.


Infant-1



If you’re easily offended you are easily manipulated. So take a breath and turn off your ego.


14, 19, 21



The most important things I can teach you is how to love and be loved


14, 19, 21



The mind replays what the heart wants to heal.


16



Send them outside with an age-appropriate pair of scissors and have them “give the grass a haircut.” Fine motor skills!


2-4



It's a skill to learn how to love people the way they need to be loved. I highly recommend reading the Five Love Languages.


18, 21



Stop before you descend too far into the pain. Let yourself be loved. Rest. Eat. Shower. Breath. Sweat. Sing.


10, 11, 12, 14, 16, 19, 21



Learn to recognize invitations from the Lord - invitations to look at beauty. Invitations for compassion, for learning and for love.


9-15



Your mother and I would never want you to sacrifice the wellbeing of your own family for us. They should always be your priority. In the years ahead, make the choices that affirm that.


21



You will come to rely on whatever you choose to help you feel better. You may even become addicted. So choose carefully. Rely on creative, positive, spirit-affirming practices to replenish yourself. Don’t fall in to the trap of alcohol/ food/gambling/smoking/sex/shopping, etc. to numb your pain or avoid dealing with difficulties. ________EVERYONE feels stress, anxiety, loss, despair, frustration and a while bunch of crappy feelings at some time or another. It’s okay to feel those things. But how you choose to DEAL with those feelings will determine a great deal in how happy your life will be.


12, 14, 16, 17, 21



Put your purse, (wallet,bag, phone, or shoe) in the backseat with the baby. Unattended babies die every day and it’s my worst nightmare.


Infant-3, 21



Go as a family to local high school musical productions.


9-13



1

Getting your drivers license will depend not only on government requirements (age, passing tests, etc.) but also maturity and trustworthiness.


14



Not knowing what you’re doing is a lot less terrifying than not knowing who to trust.


14, 19, 21



“All the best things in life live on the other side of fear.” - Will Smith’s grandmother.


20



Always stand up to shake someone’s hand. (NEVER shake a person’s hand while sitting.) Always get up out of your seat to greet a guest and walk them to the door when they leave.


13



Painful or unpleasant emotions can’t grow if you stay in the present. (Easy way to do this is to focus on your breathing.)


10, 13, 16, 21



The next world is perfect and permanent. This world is neither, so save yourself the stress of trying to make things perfect (house, job, body, relationships, bank account, etc.) Embrace the impermanence by cherishing the good times. Know that the bad times won’t last. Remember that you are loved very much, and that God will shower you with the grace you need to handle whatever this imperfect life throws at you.


21



Sometimes hookups don’t go well. The vibe is off for whatever reason. Stop. It’s okay to say “actually, let’s just call it a night.” Trust your gut. Be kind but never apologize for saying no-thanks.


15, 20



Pour energy into what’s right with you and see what happens.


20, 21



Venting is crucial but not always appropriate. Make sure you’re in the right place (no chance whatsoever of being overheard), the right time (take care of business first) and that the person you’re unloading on has the mental bandwidth to listen to you vent your emotions. Avoid interrupting if they’re busy, or not in a good headspace. You’ll know this because you asked.


14, 17, 21



Before heading out for a good time, make a mental note on the ways you could wreck or end your life if bad stuff happened: Sick/hurt/dead from alcohol or drugs, unintended pregnancy, or being raped (or being charged with rape.) What do u have to do to protect yourself and keep things from going from good times to life-changing nightmare. Keep your wits about ya. And look out for your friends too.


15, 17, 18, 19, 21



Listen to the radio stations they listen to. Know their favorite songs and artists.


12



If car breaks down, if at all possible, avoid pulling over on the highway. Get off the highway and pull to safety.


16



They’re very teachable at this age. When behavior is bad, send to their room for a brief “time-out.” Then go get them by sitting and putting him/her on your lap. Talk (1-3 sentences) about why we don’t behave that way and how I expect you to behave instead. Then hugs and kisses. If the offense is really bad, introduce consequences (which have to be immediate, they wont understand missing out on something hours from now, won’t make the connection.)


3



Plants eat sunlight. Eat mostly plants.


14, 17, 21



Glennon Doyle described a conversation about explaining to a child what "sexy" means: “I think most people are confused about what 'sexy' means. Sexy is a grown-up word to describe a person who’s confident that she is already exactly who she was made to be. A sexy woman knows herself and she likes the way she looks, thinks, and feels. She doesn’t try to change to match anybody else. “And she knows how to use her words to tell people she trusts about what’s going on inside of her. When she’s angry, she expresses her anger in healthy ways. When she’s joyful, she does the same thing. “She doesn’t hide her true self because she’s not ashamed. She knows she’s just human—exactly how God made her and that’s good enough. She’s brave enough to be honest and kind enough to accept others when they’re honest. When two people are sexy enough to be brave and kind with each other, that’s love." (The quote is longer, Google to find the whole thing. Wise words on a tough subject.)


8