Zero-cost method to reaching your goals (academic, career, fitness and health): Get up an hour earlier. You’ll be amazed how much you can get done and how “on top of it” you feel.


16, 18, 21



I read this quote in a blog when my oldest was little: "You will never be more needed or more loved than you are right now. You will long for the days when your kids were little." So true. These years are exhausting, but hang in there. You are their sun and moon.


2



Teach car maintenance: Adding air to tires, checking oil, etc.


13-17



Check out Travel for Teens for summer travel programs. Let them choose from themes like service, adventure, animal rescue, etc.


14



“You don’t emerge from $@!#% empty-handed” a friend once told me. Even the worst periods of your life will bring gifts. Be thankful for those gifts, and enjoy them.


19



On grief: CS Lewis said somewhere that it isn’t just that his friend died, it’s that the part of him that only his friend could bring out would never be brought out again.


17, 21



That trope “everything happens for a reason” is, I think, b.s. But I absolutely agree that you can find meaning in anything good or bad.


17



Put down your phone and be in the moment. Teach this. Model this.


7



Win some, learn some.


14, 17, 21



“Tell me something you want to be when you grow up.”


5, 8



When something is upsetting you...Name it...Take a deep breath...Imagine holding it gently in your hands. (This is a reminder to use this visualization myself and to teach it to you. I want to give you as many tools as I can to help you learn to cope with negative emotions in a healthy way.)


11



1

Honesty without kindness is brutality. Kindness without honesty is manipulation. (That said, when anyone asks if that outfit makes them look fat, the answer is “you look perfect.”)


20



Favorite bible verse: Psalm 143:8 “Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have placed my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I entrust my life.”


15



Whatever your first knee-jerk reaction is, it’s not always the right one. Sleep on it.


14, 17, 21



Adjust your expectations but never lower your standards.


12, 15, 18, 21



Go to movie Star Wars


12



Take out your aggression on inanimate things, never on people or animals.


9



You’ll miss me when I’m gone, but if I did my job right you won’t need me.


21



I’ve been trying to retrain my brain to deal with anxiety in healthy ways. It’s SO hard when these connections were fused decades ago. BUT I REFUSE to be a party to YOU laying down those same unhealthy neurological pathways. I’ll teach you better ways to handle stress and anxiety. Exercise/ Music/ warm showers/ creativity/ rest/ journaling/ meditation... WHATEVER! I promise to Somehow teach you what I never learned.


5-10, 14



Just love ‘em up. Be patient and kind. Be present. Listen. Play. Take care of their needs. Each one will be different and need you in different ways. That’s all, just fill them with love and security and they’ll grow up beautifully.


1-18



“If you want to be holy, be kind”. -Frederick Buechner


14, 19, 21



Let’s find an activity where you can work with your hands


11



If you’re having trouble finding your passion, read biographies and memoirs of people from all walks of life. There are so many worlds out there! You’ll find one that excites you, where your unique talents and skill set can shine.


19



Getting dumped from a bad relationship or fired from a job that’s killing you is kind of like pooping your pants: Horrifying...but also a little bit of relief. Keep your perspective and you’ll be fine. xoxo.


20



Never allow anyone to tell you who you are.


17



A useful opening line in a conversation (personal, parenting or professional) is “What should I know about ...”. It shows you understand you have something to learn, and it makes people feel valued. “What should I know about what’s going on at football practice?”


14



It’s okay if you don’t know how (or don’t want) to move on. Start with something easier…just don’t go back.


16



“When little people get overwhelmed by big feelings it’s our job to share our calm, not join their chaos.” L.R. Knost


1, 2, 3, 4, 10



No matter how successful you become you’re still expected to act with integrity and respect.


14, 18, 21



Sit down together and write house rules on anger. We don’t hit or bite. Do we yell and slam doors? Name-call? Say “I don’t love you” ? Bad words? What’s appropriate anger and what’s unacceptable?


4-6