Your brain seeks novelty. Try new things as long as you live. Take risks (but not safety risks!)


20



Learn to tie knots.


10



Don’t let someone have to tell you twice that they don’t want you. Nothing good comes from hanging on after that.


15, 21



A hard day’s work is something to be proud of, not afraid of.


8, 12, 15, 20



Always keep a can of WD-40 in the house.


21



Watch “The Sandlot” together. Great story about friendship and showing up for each other.


8



“Just because you think it doesn’t mean it’s true. Your brain’s a little b*^tch and likes to lie to you.” -Elyse Myers


13, 21



Theme this year: Self Control (Repeat every year until age 99)


6



Plan a trip to New York City to see Hamilton.


15



Surprise! You’re not perfect. No one is. Do your best, but don’t expect perfection from yourself or any other human, young or old. Have compassion...We’re all in this together and we need each other to be kind and encouraging.


17, 21



To calculate military time starting at 1300, subtract 12.


15



Not all babies are born healthy. There’s grief over that, a painful letting go of hopes and expectations, but eventually parents begin to dream different dreams for their baby. You have it within you to love deeply


21



Dream big. Work hard.


18



Sometimes our bodies can betray us. Something goes wrong and healthy cells are replaced with broken cells: Cancer, diabetes, heart disease, auto-immune diseases, etc. Mental health can become diseased too: Depression, anxiety, compulsive behavior, suicidal thoughts. The very good news is that good medical care is available for all of these things. That, along with the love and support of family and friends helps our bodies to heal. Physical illness is obvious. Sometimes people keep their mental pain a secret. Please promise me you’ll never keep any pain you’re going through a secret.


13



One of the most important things I can teach you is to help you learn how to deal with big feelings without resorting to destructive behavior or violence. Everyone on the planet will experience loss, disappointment, grief, heartbreak, betrayal, etc. Tools to deal with these feelings: counseling, journaling, art, music, exercise, meditation, breathing exercises, yoga, being in nature, talking with friends, joining a support group, movement like dancing or skating, singing, acting, anthropomorphic dialogue with your emotions, naming your emotions and describe how they physically feel in your body. Asking the emotion what it needs you to know.


1Infant-20



Beware of people that try and rial you up. Who benefits from what they’re saying? Are they trying to sell you something? Are they trying to scare you or appealing to other base emotions or prejudice? Are they qualified on the subject, or do they just have an opinion? Plenty of good, smart people get radicalized


13, 17, 21



If you can’t afford to tip the server, you can’t afford to be there.


15



When they’re upset just ask what they need: space, distraction, or talk about it.


12



Marriage tip: King sized blanket on Queen size bed.


21



Purpose is more important than happiness. Having a purpose (or looking for it) will save you. (And sometimes finding a *new* purpose is what you need.)


16, 21



You think you’re smart now but just wait. Your brain is just getting warmed up. Feed it: books, travel, music, mushrooms.


14, 17, 21



“You will use up everything you got trying to give people what they want.” —- Nina Simone


17



A useful opening line in a conversation (personal, parenting or professional) is “What should I know about ...”. It shows you understand you have something to learn, and it makes people feel valued. “What should I know about what’s going on at football practice?”


14



Practice "shaking off the sleepy." It's hard to wake up when your body is screaming for more sleep. If you practice, you'll get better. Get up, get in the shower and shake off the sleepy. It works!


6, 7, 13-15



Don’t use a bad word when you can use a good word.


10



Practice a neutral expression: Interested but not excited. A “poker face” is a good skill to know and will come in handy a lot!


13, 16, 18, 21



Send thank you acknowledgemnt for gifts received


1-21



Work Hard. Do your best. Keep your word. Never get too big for your britches. Trust in God. Have no fear


15, 21



Try to avoid the temptation to reach a conclusion too quickly or cling to it too tightly.” (Paraphrasing James Comey from his book ’A Higher Loyalty,’ which I recommend as a fantastic lesson in leadership - and history, and public service.)


19